In 1943, Yang Wei's life fell into difficulty, and to add insult to injury, the script he created also sank to the bottom, and the double blow of life and career silenced the originally optimistic Yang Wei.
At this time, Zhang Ailing was infinitely beautiful, and her works were highly sought after, and Yang Wei listened to Zhang Ailing's name every day, and her heart tingled.
Years later, she did not forget this feeling, and in a letter to a friend, she said: "Zhang Ailing looks ugly, has a peanut face, and the article is humble."
Zhang Ailing was born in a traditional official family, her grandmother was the daughter of Li Hongzhang, and her mother Huang Suqiong was the daughter of Huang Zongyan of Yanfa Dao, Guangxi, which can be described as a prominent family.
But such a rich family did not bring happiness to Zhang Ailing. His father was a young man and did not want to make progress, and his mother could not look at his style, and when Zhang Ailing was four years old, she went abroad to study. Father remarried.
As the saying goes, no mother and children are like root grass, Zhang Ailing lived under the rule of her stepmother and was bullied, so Zhang Ailing developed a taciturn personality and was seriously unsociable.
This misfit has left her with mixed reputations.
Because of the misfit, Zhang Ailing had a lot of time to read books, but she did not expect this move to inspire Zhang Ailing's writing talent.
In 1932, Zhang Ailing studied at Santa Maria Girls' School, and she often published works in the school magazine, but her words were deeply liked by her classmates.
For this reason, she became a popular figure in the school, and her name is well known. However, this fame did not bring her friendship, but slander.
It turned out that Zhang Ailing's life was in a mess at this time, her parents were divorced, her father was immersed in clouds and mist all day, her stepmother was cold, and her home was like an ice cellar.
Zhang Ailing wears an old cheongsam of her stepmother forever, and one is the color of ground beef, like having frostbite, and this loveless environment has left her with psychological trauma.
Zhang Ailing is sensitive and inferior, but she shows arrogance and does not care about people, so what the students see is that Zhang Ailing is wrapped in a cheongsam all day long, rejecting the cold.
Zhang Ailing is still informal, often throwing things around, and even the left and right feet of shoes can be worn wrong, this sense of separation between appearance and behavior makes her an outlier in the eyes of her classmates.
At this time, Qian Zhongshu's niece Shi Dingguo was studying at this school, and Shi Dingguo was a traditional girl who could not appreciate Zhang Ailing's maverick.
So not only did the two not become friends, but Shi Dingguo also had an inexplicable disdain for Zhang Ailing in his heart.
One day, Shi Dingguo went to visit Qian Zhongshu and Yang Wei, and when she talked about life in school, she told Yang Wei her disdain for Zhang Ailing like a joke:
"Zhang Ailing wants to be in the limelight, deliberately dressed up strangely, and wants to attract people, but she looks ugly, with a "peanut rice" (acne), and her classmates look down on her. ”
Yang Wei disdained these gossip, just as the little nature of her niece's little daughter, and she didn't care, but she didn't expect that Zhang Ailing would become a thorn in her heart in the future. It made her suffer for half her life.
Yang Wei was born into a family of scholars, the family is harmonious, nourished in love since childhood, and it is smooth sailing when he grows up, married to Qian Zhongshu, a famous talent in Tsinghua, the two are very loving, and life is smooth and peaceful for Yang Wei.
However, even the most successful life will have its ups and downs
In 1943, Qian Zhongshu had no means of work, and the burden of supporting his family fell on Yang Wei's shoulders, and Yang Wei went to teach in a school dozens of kilometers away from his home while writing scripts to supplement his family.
In the face of a difficult life, earning a living has become a top priority. She tried to create the script of "Happy Heart", and then created "Fake into True", and the response to both works was good after their release.
Just when Yang Wei was proud and wanted to show her strength in drama creation, a new female writer was born, directly extinguishing Yang Wei's dream.
This female writer is Zhang Ailing, in 1943, Zhang Ailing's writing potential exploded, she first wrote "Agarwood Crumbs First Incense", this article made Zhang Ailing a hit in the Shanghai literary circle.
She chased after the victory, and then wrote works such as "Agarwood Crumbs Second Incense" and "Love in the City", and Zhang Ailing became famous.
For a while, Shanghai Beach was proud to be able to read Zhang Ailing's novels, and few people read the works of other female writers.
Yang Wei listened to Zhang Ailing's overwhelming reports all day, watching her unattended drama, and a feeling of ants eating floated in her heart, and this feeling was infinitely magnified by one thing.
Zhang Ailing got married, and the object of marriage was Hu Lancheng, at this time Hu Lancheng was 38 years old, Zhang Ailing was 24 years old, and Hu Lancheng was married, but these were not obstacles, Zhang Ailing said:
"When she saw him, she became very low, low to the dust, but her heart was joyful, and flowers bloomed from the dust."
At this time, love blinded Zhang Ailing's eyes, and she completely forgot Hu Lancheng's identity, at this time, Hu Lan became a Japanese writer and was an out-and-out cultural traitor.
In 1944, Zhang Ailing and Hu Lancheng got married, and when the news came out, the orthodox literati sighed for Zhang Ailing.
After Yang Wei read the report, she remembered her niece's evaluation of Zhang Ailing, and then looked at what Zhang Ailing did, and a sense of disgust arose. She told Qian Zhongshu about this disgust.
In her eyes, Zhang Ailing is a somewhat talented jumping beam clown, ugly and loves to show off, likes to wear strange clothes and fake Qinggao, a little talented and loves to show.
Zhang Ailing never imagined that she was disgusted by a woman she had never met, and her words were sharp and mean. Yang Wei is 9 years old and Ailing, and she puts on a posture that the elders are not accustomed to the younger generations.
Zhang Ailing didn't know that many years later, Yang Wei published a collection of essays "Six Notes on Dry School", and after Zhang Ailing read it, she greatly praised:
"Yang Wei's recent "Six Notes on Dry School" is so good, so diluted and humorous, and there is a faint and weird sense of the world."
Perhaps, this is Zhang Ailing's usual politeness to strangers, but in any case, Zhang Ailing pertinently recognizes Yang Wei's writing style.
But Yang Wei has never changed her prejudice against Zhang Ailing, perhaps Zhang Ailing stung her sensitive nerves, so that she could not let go, in her later years, Yang Wei vented this emotion on paper in letters to friends:
"I think you all think too much of Zhang Ailing, I am prejudiced against her, my niece and Zhang are both students of St. Mary's Girls' School, my niece said that Zhang Ailing wants to be in the limelight when she dies, deliberately dressed up strangely, and wants to attract people, but she looks very ugly, with a 'peanut rice' (youth bean also), and her classmates look down on her. Her writing is good, but her mood is humble. ”
After Mr. Yang Wei's death in 2016, her letter was made public, and Yang Wei's evaluation of Zhang Ailing was presented to the world, causing an uproar.
People would never believe how Yang Wei, who disdained to fight with anyone, could have such a big prejudice against Zhang Ailing, and not be unhappy.
But Zhang Ailing has long been ancient, after all, dust has returned to dust, and perhaps it is Zhang Ailing who disdains the world.
She only lived according to her heart all her life, lived transparently, and did not hurt anyone, but her talent inevitably hurt people.
Mr. Yang Wei once said: I don't fight with anyone, and I don't disdain anyone to fight. How could a person who lived so transparently evaluate Zhang Ailing so much? There are three reasons for this:
First, in literature, Zhang Ailing has always pressed Yang Wei, and Yang Wei's dramas "Happy Heart", "Fake into True", and "Game in the World" created by Yang Wei.
It was eclipsed after the publication of Zhang Ailing's work, which dampened Yang Wei's confidence in her talent.
The second is that Zhang Ailing is naturally beautiful, talented, and combines beauty and talent, and she is famous all over the country at a young age, so it causes the jealousy of other talented women.
Moreover, jealousy is also one of women's innate nature, no matter how reasonable a woman is, it will also produce jealousy, just a matter of how much, strength or weakness.
Third, there is a gap in age, which leads to differences in ideas. Yang Wei has family and country feelings, and Zhang Ailing lives herself, especially marrying Hu Lancheng, which makes Zhang seem to be indifferent.
Therefore, it is reasonable that Yang Wei does not like Zhang Ailing.