Since the incident, my mother has become stronger, and her waist has straightened out as if she has become the master of the family. But my grandfather became unheeded, and he was very worried all day long, and he was sentenced to two people before. He talked to my mother a lot and always talked in two words, mostly listening to my mother, and then waved his hand and muttered, "Well, you can do whatever you like..."
Now, two houses in the front yard are for my mother. She often had guests in and out of her, most often the Maximov brothers: one was Peter, a tall officer, and the last time I had ripped off the bald old man, my grandfather had beaten me up in front of the officer; the other was Yevgeny, who was also very tall, pale, with a black moustache. He liked to speak in a low voice with a smile on his face, and every time he began, he always said, "You know what I think..." His mother always squinted her eyes when she heard him speak, with a little ridicule on her face, and often interrupted him: "You are a little child, please forgive me..." The officer patted his knee and shouted, "He's not a child..."
For more than ten days after Christmas, my mother's place was full of high-rollers all day long, all dressed in gorgeous costumes. The mother also dressed up and often went out with the guests. As soon as she left, the home suddenly fell silent, filled with a feeling of loneliness that was full of loss. After the festival, my mother began sending me and Sasha, the son of Uncle Mikhail, to school. Sasha's father continued the string, and within a few days of her mother entering the door, she began to dislike him and often beat him.
His grandmother, sad sasha, insisted that his grandfather bring him to his house. We were only in school for a month or so, and all I remember about what was taught in school was, people asked, "What's your last name?" You can't simply answer "Pishkov" and say, "My last name is Pishkov"; nor can you say to the teacher, "Boy, don't shout, I'm not afraid of you..." I immediately resented the school. The cousin was satisfied for a few days at first, and soon found a partner, but once he fell asleep in class and suddenly cried out in a terrible dream: "I dare not..."
He was thrown out of the classroom and ridiculed by his classmates the next day, when we both went to school and had just walked to the hill near Shenanaya Square. "You go to school, I'm not going!" I want to go for a walk. ”
He stopped and said to me:
Si Guo came down, put the book color mesh geography in the grass push, and ran to play. I was very anxious to go to school, and the next day he had a good reason not to go to school.
On the third day of farewell, his grandfather discovered his obsessive behavior. So we were both interrogated. Cheng Yi, my grandmother and my mother sat behind the table in the kitchen and began interrogating me and Sasha. I remember how Sasha laughed at answering her grandfather's question:
"Why don't you go to school?"
Sasha looked gently into her grandfather's face and replied unhurriedly, "I forgot where the school is." ”
"Forgot?"
"Yes. I looked for half a day..."
"Won't you follow Alexei?" He remembers! ”
"I broke up with him."
"Separated from Alexei?"
"Yes."
"How did it get scattered?"
Sasha thought for a moment, sighed and said, "There was a snowstorm and I couldn't see anything." ”
Everyone laughed because the weather had been sunny and there was no wind at all. Sasha also secretly smiled. Grandfather gritted his teeth and asked sarcastically, "Then why don't you take Alexei's hand and pull on his belt?" ”
"I was pulling, but the wind swept me away." Sasha explains.
He spoke lazily, with a look of despair on his face. Listening to his clumsy lies, I felt embarrassed. But his stubbornness did surprise me.
My grandfather beat us up solidly. After that, he hired someone to send us to school. This is an old man with a broken arm who used to be a firefighter. His task was to watch Sasha lest he run away on his way to school. But that didn't help.
Just the next day, as we approached the edge of the valley, my cousin suddenly bent down and took off one of his felt boots, threw it far away, and took off another one and threw it in the other direction. Then, wearing only socks, he ran as he pleased, and ran away from under the old man's eyes. The old man cried out, "Oops," and ran to retrieve his boots, and then led me home in a panic.
Throughout the day, my grandfather, grandmother, and my mother traveled the city in search of the escaped Sasha, until you could find him in the Gurkotian Tavern next to the monastery. At that time, he was there to entertain the customers, Sasha was taken home, and his grandfather did not beat him. Everyone was confused by the silence of the child's two reputations.
After dinner, he and I lay on the high-slab bed and whispered to me, "I don't like me in the aftermath, my father doesn't like me, even my grandfather doesn't like me, so why should I live with them?" I'm going back to grandma's robbers now, and I'm going to run to them... Let's run together. ”
I couldn't run with him because then I had my own plans. I decided to be an officer with a big pale yellow beard, so I had to go to school well.
I confided this idea to my cousin, who thought about it for a moment, approved of my plan, and said, "That's fine." In the future you will be an officer and I will be the leader of the bandits. You'll come and catch me, and we'll both not know who will kill whom, or who will capture whom." If I catch you, I will never kill you. ”
"I won't kill you either."
The two of us are all set on our word.
Then my grandmother came in, and she climbed onto the stove, looked at us, and said, "What are you doing, little rats?" Alas, the two orphans, what a pity! ”
My grandmother pitied us for a while, and then she scolded Sasha's stepmother, Nadezhda. Aunt Nadezhda was the daughter of a tavern owner and an obese woman. My grandmother scolded all the stepmothers and stepfathers in the world, and told us a story about my stepmothers.
The next morning I woke up and found red dots all over my body. Oh my God, out of the sky. Fearing smallpox, they moved me to the attic and tied me firmly to the bed. It was hard for me to see people all day, except for my grandmother, who came to feed me food. She fed me mouth-to-mouth like a baby and told me many new stories.
During this time, I was constantly having strange nightmares, one of which almost killed me. At that time, my illness was basically better, and the adults no longer tied me to the bed, but just wrapped my fingers with a thin band to prevent me from scratching the acne spots on my face. The dream scenario goes like this:
One night, my grandmother had not yet come very late, which disturbed me greatly. However, I saw her lying on the dusty steps outside the house, face down, on the road
Stretched out, the neck was cut open, leaving a deep knife edge, like Peter Uncle
The wound under the flower is like that. At this moment, out of the dark corner of the dusty, a big cat came out, and it walked up to the grandmother, staring greedily at a pair of green eyes...
I woke up, didn't think much of it, slammed open the window and jumped down, my rash move made my legs lose consciousness, and I was there again
Completely forget that it was a dream.
For three months, you raise the same. My teacher's home was getting more and more noisy, and there was often a sound of laughter coming from behind, and it seemed that there were many people walking around there.
On a snowy night, the melancholy wind blew on the roof, the crows chirped, and the wolf in the middle of the night was accompanied by the sound of the night, and my body and mind were slowly growing. At the same time, the timid spring also came to me from the window carefully.
My grandmother still came to see me a lot, and I found that when she spoke, she often emitted a strong face from her mouth. One day, she brought a large white teapot. She hid the teapot under my bed, squeezed her eyes at me and said, "My heart and liver baby, you must not say it to your grandfather!" ”
"Why are you drinking?"
"Don't talk too much! You'll know when you're older..."
She took a sip of wine from the spout of the pot, wiped her lips with her sleeve, and with a sweet smile on her face, asked, "Oh, my little darling, what did we talk about yesterday?" ”
"Tell me about my father."
"Where's it going?"
After I reminded her, she didn't hesitate to tell the story. Her words are melodious and rhythmic, like a stream flowing through.
About my father, my grandmother took the initiative to tell me. Once she came to me, without drinking, with a tired face and a sad look, and said, "I dreamed of your father, who was walking alone in the wilderness, holding a walnut stick in his hand, whistling as he walked, followed by a long-haired dog... For some reason, recently I have dreamed of Maxim Savajeevich, whose soul is still wandering around and has not found a place to rest..."
My grandmother told me my father's story for several nights in a row. These stories are as interesting as the others she tells.
My father was the son of an officer. My grandfather was grumpy and was later exiled to Siberia for abusing his subordinates, where my father was born. My father's life was terrible, and he often ran away from home at a very young age. Grandfather always took a few hounds into the forest to find him, like catching rabbits. Once my grandfather caught him and beat him to death, thanks to his neighbors taking him away and hiding him, it was impossible to be beaten to death.
"Do all the children have to be beaten?" I asked my grandmother.
She replied calmly, "Yes, they all have to be beaten." ”
My grandmother died very early, my father died when he was 9 years old, and my grandfather died. Since then, the father has been raised by his godfather. His godfather, a joiner, began teaching him carpentry early on. But not many fathers ran away from him, wandering the market, serving as a guide for the blind man.
My father arrived in Nizhny at the age of 16 to work as a helper for a carpenter on a steamship. 20% of fathers became good carpenters, framers and decorators. The carpenter's shop where he was on Leha Street, next to his grandfather's house.
"The walls of our house are not high, and so is his boldness," my grandmother chuckled, "and Varia and I were picking marlin nuts in the garden when suddenly someone jumped over the wall and startled me." He's your father, a strong guy. He proposed! I had seen him sometimes walk by my window, and when I saw him, I thought to myself: When a young man waited for him to come to me, I asked him: 'Young man, why don't you go the right way, but you want to climb over the wall, but he 'grunts' and falls to his knees, saying: 'Akulina Ivanovna, please help us I want to marry Varia!' When I heard this, I was frightened and stupid, and my tongue did not listen to the call. The first time I looked at your mother, she was blushing with shame, like a marlin fruit, and was gesturing to him!
"I said, 'What the hell are you guys playing?' Varvara, are you crazy or what? And you, young man, think about it, do you deserve to pick this flower? At that time, your grandfather was still a big man, with four properties and a prominent reputation. Not long before that, he was commended by the government for being the president of the guild for 9 years, and he was very angry at that time! I said it very easily now, but I was trembling with fear.
"Looking at the sad faces of the two of them, I also pitied them in my heart. Then your father said: Knowing that Vasily will not marry Valia to me so painfully, so I will secretly marry her, and now I ask for your help! 'Actually begged me to help them!' I gave him a slap, he didn't dodge him and said, 'You just stoned me, and I have no complaints, just ask you to help us, I will give up this marriage anyway!' Then Varvara came up to him, put her hand on his shoulder, and said to me, 'We got married as early as May, and now we're just going to have a wedding.' It's a dizzying thing to say, oh my God! ”
At this point, my grandmother laughed and laughed all over the place. Then, she sniffed the snuff and wiped her tears, breathed a sigh of relief happily, and continued: "You don't know what marriage is, what is called holding a wedding, but you must know that if a girl's family has not yet held a wedding and has a child, it is a terrible disaster!" You must remember my words, when you grow up, don't tempt the girls to do this, otherwise you will create a great sin, the girl will be unhappy for life, and the children born will be illegitimate. You must remember
Beware! In the future, when you are with women, you must feel sorry for them and love them sincerely, not just
Momentarily. I tell you these are for your own good! ”
Her body swayed gently in the chair, falling into deep thought. After a while, she shook her head and said, "Hey, what do I do?" I tapped Maxim's forehead and tugged at Valva's braids, but he said reasonably: 'Hitting won't solve the problem!' Varia said too.
Think about what to do first, and then it's not too late to fight! "So I asked him, 'Do you have money?' He said:
'There was some money,
But I took the money to buy Varia a ring.
How much money have you saved, two or three rubles, right? I asked him.
"He said: 'No, almost 100 rubles.'" At that time, money was valuable and things were cheap. I looked at both of them and thought, these two young people are such a pair of fools! Your mother said, 'I'm afraid you'll see it, so I hid the ring under the floor, but I can't sell it!' ”
"Hey, what a kid! That being said, I decided to help them. We talked about it, but finally it was agreed: the wedding would be held in a week' time, and I would personally negotiate with the priest to deal with it. Alas, I couldn't help but cry a lot at that time, and my heart was always trembling, afraid that your grandfather would know that your mother was also frightened at that time. In the end, things were finally arranged!
"But on their way to church, an uneasy and well-meaning man informed your grandfather of this. Your grandfather was a crazy beast! He used to say that he was going to marry Varia to the noble lord! He bounced around the yard as if he were on fire, called out your two uncles, took a hammer and a shotgun, and immediately prepared to chase after him on horseback! Our horses are good horses, running like flying, and the carriage is brisk, I thought to myself, this is over, I can catch up with them!
"Just then, your mother's guardian angel pointed me in, and I found a knife and secretly cut the holster of the rut. I thought to myself, this is the way down to the road must be broken! Sure enough, the holsters broke, and they overturned the car on the road, almost killing your grandfather, Uncle Mikhail, and the coachman. They finally stalled. By the time they had repaired their cars and rushed to the church, Varia and Maxim had finished their wedding and had come out of the church. Hey, thank God so much!
"The gang from our house rushed up and tried to beat Maxim, but Maxim was so powerful that he threw Mikhail out a long way, and the coachman was injured. Your grandfather and Uncle Yakov were so frightened that they never dared to come forward again. Your father was also angry, but he did not lose his mind, and he said to your grandfather: 'Throw away the hammer, don't dangle it in front of my eyes.' I am a man of peace and self-preservation, and all I get is given to me by God, and no one wants to take it, but I don't want anything from you. 'Your grandfather, they don't dare to pester him anymore.'
Your grandfather got into the carriage and shouted, "Valvara, farewell forever, you are no longer my daughter, I don't want to see you again, whether you live or starve, it has nothing to do with me." He came home and beat me up and scolded me, and I didn't say a word. I thought to myself, everything will pass, anyway, raw rice is cooked to maturity!
"Later, your grandfather said to me: 'Listen, Akulina, you don't have this daughter anymore and remember my words!' I didn't say a word, thinking in my heart, you nonsense, red hair, this resentment like ice cubes and other warm weather, it will naturally melt! ”
I listened intently and listened with relish. But one thing that puzzled me was that my grandfather described it to me about my mother's marriage, which was not at all the case. He said that he had opposed the marriage and that after the wedding, he would not allow my mother to come home and live there. But according to him, my mother's wedding was not held secretly, and he also went to the church to attend. I don't want to ask my grandmother who said it more precisely, but I think what my grandmother said was more moving and made me like it.
My grandmother continued, "For the first two weeks, even I didn't know where Varia and Maxim lived, but then Varia sent a clever little ghost to tell me. On Sundays, I pretended to go to church for vespers and watched them go! They lived far away, in a small house in a large courtyard. The courtyard was full of craftsmen, full of garbage, dirty and panicked. But they both looked good, like a pair of happy kittens, giggling and playing.
"I brought them a whole bunch of stuff and had it all: tea, sugar, grains, jam, flour, dried mushrooms, and gave them some money, I can't remember how much. I stole this money from your grandfather, and as long as it's not for my own sake, stealing is okay! Your father didn't want to either, and said to me in a huff, 'Do you think we're beggars?'
"Varvara followed suit: 'Oh, Mom, why are you doing this?' I counted them down: 'Fool, who am I? It's your mother-in-law! And you, silly, I'm your mother! Do you want to make me angry? Hearing me say this, Maxim picked me up and walked around the house, dancing softly. This guy is so powerful, like a bear!
Varia walked around like a beautiful peacock, constantly praising her husband like a newly bought rag doll. She also told me about their housework in a serious manner, like a real housewife, and that look was really laughing!
"It went on like this for a long time, until you were about to give birth, and your grandfather didn't say a word. His temper is too stubborn! I secretly went to visit my daughter and son-in-law, and he knew it, but he didn't make a sound. He forbade his family to mention Varia, so everyone was silent. I didn't say a word, but I knew in my heart that the door of my father's heart would not be closed forever.
Sure enough, this long-awaited moment had arrived. One night there was a snowstorm, the windows seemed to be scratched by bears, and there was a chirping cry in the chimney, as if all the devils had broken free of their chains and wreaked havoc on the dark earth. Your grandfather and I were lying in bed, rolling over and unable to sleep. I said, 'On such a night, the poor are not happy, and the people who have a heart are even more upset!'
"Your grandfather suddenly asked, 'How are they doing?'
"I said, 'It's okay, it's fine.'
Your grandfather said, 'Do you know who I'm asking?'
"You have daughter Varvara and son-in-law Maxime between you!"
How do you guess I'm asking about them? ，
Come on,' I said, 'Old man, stop being stubborn, and don't do it anymore.'
Acting, if you are so stubborn, who can be happy?
He sighed and said, 'Oh, you guys, useless things!' Then he asked, that big bastard, and said your father, is he really an asshole?
I said, 'Those who are lazy and fed by others are bastards.' Can't you get our Yakov and Mikhail, isn't this exactly a pair of bastards? Who in our house? Who makes money? It's not all you. How much have they helped you? As a result, he scolded me fiercely, scolded me for being stupid and despicable, scolded me for indulging my daughter in adultery with others, and could not remember what else he had scolded, and finally he said: 'You don't know his personality at all, nor do you know his details, how can you easily believe him?' ’
"I haven't said a word. When he said he was tired, I said, 'You'd better see for yourself how they're doing, they're doing well.' ’
"He said: 'I went to see them?' It was too much to lift them up, and to see them was to let them come to me...' When I heard him leak this wind, I cried with joy. He stroked my hair and whispered, 'Don't cry, fool, I'm not a man without a heart!' 'Well, your grandfather used to be fine.' We, the old man, thought he was right, thought that no one was as smart as him, and since then he has become angry and stupid.
"On the last Sunday of Lent, your father and your mother came. The two of them dressed up neatly and stood respectfully in front of your grandfather. Maxim said: 'Vasily Vasilyevich, God testify, please do not think that I have come to ask you for a dowry, I have come to ask for peace from my wife's father.'
"Your grandfather was so happy to hear this that he grinned and said, 'Hey, you stupid big man, good man in the green forest!' Come on, stop being naughty, move in and live together! Maxim frowned and said, "It depends on what Varia means, I don't care about myself!" 'Hey, these two guys, grinding their teeth as soon as they meet, how can they not fit!' I gave your father a look and kicked him under the table for a moment he wouldn't listen to anyone but me. I love him more than my own son. He also understands it in his heart, so he likes me very much. "At that time, your mother was a mischievous gossip, and she pounced on your father and shouted, 'How dare you say such a thing?' You salty-eared Permiak! The three of us were just playing like this, and the days were going to be happy, my heart and liver! Your father danced well, and sang a lot of nice songs, and he learned from the blind men, and those blind men were very good singers! He and your mother eventually moved back in, living in a cottage in the garden, where you were born. It was exactly noon, and your father came back for lunch, just in time for your birth. He was so happy that he went crazy, and your mother was exhausted by his commotion, this fool, he didn't seem to know how painful it was for a woman to have a baby! He asked me to sit on his shoulder and cross the yard to report the birth of your grandson to your grandfather. Your grandfather looked at him and couldn't help but laugh and say, "Hey, look at you monster, Maxim!" ’
"Alas, but neither of your uncles like him, for he never drinks, does not speak people, and has a clever mind and many ideas." Once, your father almost lost his life. You know, your uncle Mikhail, like your maternal grandfather, is narrow-minded and vengeful, and he has long planned to kill your father. It was just winter that year, and one day they came back from a visit, accompanied by four people: your father, your two uncles, and a church priest, who was later expelled from the church for killing the coachman.
"They came back from Post Street and tricked Maxim into going to Zyukov Pond, saying that they were going to skate for a while, not wearing skates, just like a child and just like a child. Your father went with them, and they took advantage of him not to push him into the ice cave. I've told you about it before..."
"Why are the uncles so cruel?"
"They're not cruel," said my grandmother, sniffing the snuff, calmly, "they're just stupid!" Mikhail is cunning and stupid, Yakov is not very cunning, but stupid... They pushed your father into the ice cave, but he quickly got out again, grabbed the edge of the ice with his hand, and they stomped his hand with their feet and broke his fingers. Thankfully he didn't drink, and they were all drunk. "As if God was blessing him, he actually straightened up under the ice,
Only expose your face to the center of the ice cave and gasp for breath in this way. They couldn't reach him, threw an ice cube at him and left, saying they were going to let him sink himself! Unexpectedly, your father climbed up, and he immediately went to the police station. The police station is away
That place wasn't far away, you know, just in the square next to the pond. The sheriff knew him, and he knew everyone in our family. He asks your father what the hell is going on.
When my grandmother said this, she quickly drew a cross on her chest and said gratefully. "Rest in heaven with the holy spirits of your sincerity, O God, for He is worthy of your blessing!" He was hiding the truth from the police, saying:
The ground walked into the pond and fell into the ice cave. Stumbled
"The sheriff said: You lie, you never drink!' Well, gossip aside, in the police station, people wiped him with wine, changed into dry clothes, wrapped him in a leather jacket, and sent him home. It was the sheriff himself who sent him, and two more policemen. At this time, your two uncles had not yet returned to the Yao Tavern. Your mother and I ran out to see Maxim, only to see that he had completely changed, his purple fingers were all broken, bleeding, and his sideburns seemed to stick to the snow, but they did not melt, and it turned out that the mane was suddenly white!
"When Varia saw this, she cried out loud: 'What are they doing to you?' The sheriff is very sensitive and does not let go of anything. At this point, I knew in my heart that something must have happened. I asked Varia to wrap her arms around the sheriff and quietly ask Maxim what had happened? He whispered, "Go find Mikhail and Yakov and teach them that they went to Pokrovka Street after they broke up with me on the street of the post, and I turned into the alley of Pulyajel." Don't say it's wrong or the police station will get in trouble! ’
"I went to your grandfather and said to him, 'Go and receive the sheriff, and I'll go to the gate to my son.'" I told him something was wrong. He was trembling with fright, and while he was dressing haphazardly, he nagged and said, 'I knew this was going to happen, and I expected it to be messed up!' He was talking nonsense, he didn't know anything beforehand! In this way, I intercepted my two sons outside the gate and slapped them head-on. Mikhail was startled and immediately woke up. Yakov's tongue was hard, but he was finally able to say something: 'I don't know anything, it was all done by Mihai, he is the boss!' ’
"We said it well, and finally reassured the sheriff.com. He was a good gentleman. He said, "Beware, if anything happens to you here, I will find out whose culpability it is." With that he was gone.
"Then your grandfather walked up to Maxim and said, 'Hey, thank you very much, if it comes to the foot man, no one will give up, I understand this!' Thank you, daughter, for bringing you to your father's house as a good man! "Your grandfather, if he is happy, he can talk, but then he became stupid and locked the door of his heart."
When only our mother-in-law was left in the house, Maxim began to cry, as if in a dream: Why did they harm me? What am I sorry for them? Mom, why is this? "Why did he repeatedly talk to me, and what can I say?" I only had to shout "It's my kids, I really care about them." Your mother was so angry that she ripped off the buttons of her coat. The new curriculum standard of the Chinese language is required to read
His head sat there scattered, as if he had fought, crying, "Let's get out of here, Maxi's two brothers see us as enemies and can't provoke them, so let's get out of the way!" At this point, you sent two bastards to make up for it, and she jumped up and pounced on Miška, "snapping" at his face, and it was a few times that the matter was over! Afterwards, your father was seriously ill, lying for six or seven weeks, and sometimes I could say, "Hey, Mom, come with us to other cities. Soon they did go to Astrakhan. The Tsar is going to tour there in the summer, where preparations are being made for the ride, and your father accepts the task of participating in the construction of the Arc de Triomphe. As soon as spring began, they took the first ship and left.
"When I said goodbye to them, I felt terrible. Your father was also very sad and kept persuading me to go to Tayerrakhan. Varvara was so happy that she didn't even hide her happiness, this shameless girl... That's how they went. Here's the thing, I'm done..."
"Your father is not me
The grandmother took a sip of wine and looked thoughtfully up at the gray-blue sky:
Raw, but our hearts are connected! ”
When my grandmother told me stories, sometimes my grandfather would suddenly break in, raise his weasel-like face, look at my grandmother suspiciously, and sniff the air with a pointed nose. While listening to his grandmother tell the story, he muttered:,... Suddenly he asked coldly, Alexei, did she just drink? ”
"Nothing."
"Lie, look into your eyes and you know you're lying."
Having said this, he went out in disbelief.
Once, my grandfather stood in the middle of the room, looked down at the wooden floor, and asked softly, "Old woman?" Do you know why things have gotten to this point? ”
"It's fate, old man! Remember, didn't you always say you were looking for an aristocratic son-in-law? ”
"Yes, but it turned out to be a poor ghost. "You're here
Grandfather went out. I thought something was wrong with their conversation, so I asked my grandmother:
Say what? ”
"You have to ask everything." My grandmother rubbed my legs and replied without anger, "When I was a child, I wanted to inquire about everything, but when I was old, I had nothing to inquire about..." She shook her head and laughed.
"Oh, old man, old man, in God's eyes you are nothing but a speck of dust!" Be careful with your liver, I'll tell you — don't say it, your grandfather has completely stripped the family business! He lent a large sum of money to a grandfather, not wanting the old man to go bankrupt..."
She fell into contemplation and sat silently for a long time. Her wide face wrinkled, and her look became dark and sad.
My mother had a hard time getting to the top floor to see me, and even if she came, she wouldn't stay long, so she hurriedly said a few words to me and left. She became prettier day by day, dressed more and more beautifully. I felt that something new was happening in her, just like my grandmother's, and although she was hiding it from me, I felt it obviously. The stories my grandmother told were less and less of my interest, and even telling about my father did not bring me comfort. I felt a faint sense of apprehension and uneasiness, and this emotion grew in my heart day by day. "Why can't my father's soul rest?" I asked my grandmother.
"How can this be known?" She closed her eyes slightly and said to me, "This is god's arrangement, a heavenly thing, how can we know..."
At night, I often look up at the sky, and many tragic stories have sprung up in my heart, the protagonists of the stories are fathers, in the wilderness, he is alone with a stick to go forward, followed by a long-haired dog...