Three years ago, about the end of winter, Pig Pig took me to see a movie "Love and Blind Date", which made me nostalgic until now.
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At the beginning of the film, it is a parting of life and death.
When Grandma died, the only picture left in her mind was a happy time with her wife.
Although there was no mention of it, then the daughter Huiying understood: her mother wanted to be buried with her father.
To be honest, after watching the film, I don't know if this is really the old man's last wish, or the daughter's stubborn thought.
Maybe this is love, it may be difficult to be understood and recognized by others, but the person who loves must be trying to do what they think is right.
Huiying wanted to move her father's grave to the city to be buried with her mother, which was supposed to be a natural thing, but she was greatly hindered, and it turned out that there was another woman between her grandfather and grandmother: Azu.
Many years ago, Grandpa and Azu were arranged for marriage.
But before long, Grandpa went into the city alone, married his grandmother in the city, and formed another family.
He replaced his responsibility to Azu by sending money, and never returned to the village.
Azu closed the door of his heart and volunteered to live in the countryside.
The childless and childless waited for forty years, only to receive a grave of the husband's corpse.
Look, a woman has waited all her life, and a few short lines can be summarized.
But her life was too hard and too sad.
The film was shot in Zhengzhou, and there are a lot of familiar pictures in it, bars, viaducts, street scenes... Including the village where Azu waited all his life.
Grandpa's corpse and the towering chastity arch are Azu's only confidence, and their only thoughts, whether alive or dead: you can't be born with the same person, but you must die in the same cave - she has already prepared the coffin and put it in the sleeping house.
In the face of Huiying's menacing relocation of the grave, Azu silently resisted and stood in front of the grave.
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Who said: The person who is not loved in love is the third person.
Han Han also said: In addition to love, everyone else is a third party.
Of course, Grandpa and Grandma are in love with each other, and the letter of the Hongyan Biography is touching.
Grandpa and Azu also had letters, boxes of letters, but it was a family letter.
This is a typical Chinese story, which was not uncommon in those days.
Historically, the relationship between grandfather and grandmother and Azu was actually the relationship between Lu Xun, Xu Guangping and Zhu An, or between Chiang Kai-shek, Song Meiling and Mao Fumei.
In the movie, Azu is illiterate, but she uses an ancient script symbol, draws her grandfather's name, and frames it to the wall.
She stubbornly clings to the wrong marriage and injects meaning into it: "I can't live for so many years in vain." Thus sinking deeper and deeper, spending his whole life to hold on to his stupidity.
Vivi's arrival made her understand that love should not be a feeling that has no response, standing in place and waiting, self-touching.
When she walked into his home and looked at the pictures on the wall, it was not what she remembered, but she waited for him all her life.
She thought with trepidation and uneasiness: It's not like him.
If he wasn't him, what was the point of her waiting?
That day, she received a photo from Vivi's boyfriend, Ada: Ada had put her picture with her grandfather's P.
It was raining heavily and the picture was drenched, and she shuddered with her hands to wipe it, but accidentally took his face off.
Finally she had an emotional breakdown and cried.
In that cry was love, but also relief.
Perhaps from that moment she began to understand: false things, is so vulnerable.
Finally, when the grave removal team came again, she did not stop it, but said to the corpse grave, "I don't want you anymore", and then waved her hand and "entered the city".
What tormented Azu was not her grandfather's desperation, but the expectations she had always had fantasies about.
But some thoughts will never be echoed in their lives.
Instead of obsessively waiting and torturing yourself over and over again in an unforested relationship, let go and go and wait for someone who is willing to work with you.
Instead of missing a disease, it is better to give deep regret to the years.
Someday, those, you can't cross the hurdles, walk and walk to fill in.
What can't be forgotten is memory, and going on is life.
You have to believe that you don't have the luck to be with him because you have better luck.
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Huiying people reached middle age, strong and vulnerable, often hanging "for your own good" and "I know", which was a typical mother image of that era.
No one heard her grandmother's last words, but she insisted that it was the greatest hope of her mother's life, and she imposed this hope on everyone.
The early union with her husband also relied on a strong invasion: sweeping the floor for his parents and capturing each other with realistic benefits.
The taciturn husband once complained: Even if you live together for a lifetime, you can't say that you are in love.
In the face of a rebellious, selfish daughter, trying to walk into the other party is always counterproductive.
At first I thought that the unloved woman probably lived herself into a hedgehog, and once someone approached, she unconsciously propped up the thorn.
But looking at the back, I found that it was not.
The crisis of middle-aged marriage, each of them is distraught and tacit.
The silent husband, silently embracing everything, is almost responsive to his wife's needs. In the face of the quarrel between his wife and daughter, he always advised his daughter to give in.
Teacher's Day card to my wife:
hero:
In the past, the days were hard, and I always hoped to live better. Now that the days are better, the feelings are weaker. After all these years, what unhappiness has been in your heart, that is really my fault. Don't go through with yourself, take a shower and get some sleep, our road is still long.
Filial piety
The man in Huiying's dream is actually what her husband looked like when he was young.
At the end of the film, Hye Young and her husband drive a newly purchased car and finally go to realize their young dreams.
Do you remember that in 1990, when we both went to Beijing with Weiwei, there was a young man on the train, carrying a tape recorder, from this end to that end, from that end to this end, and played this song, don't you remember?
- Didn't hear you say you were going to buy a new car.
- I want to take you for a ride.
I don't want to go anywhere, how much did you spend?
- Don't you remember? You said at that time, after the two of us retire, buy a car of our own, and we will go for a ride together.
Now that you have a car and a song, you're not interested.
Maybe it's my fault, so many years, let you suffer so much grievances, if you want to, I can also let go, you can do it again.
I'm definitely going out myself, it's best to have you there, and if you're not there, I'll go by myself.
One of them was crying, the other was laughing, and there was happiness in their eyes.
They are not without love, but the trivialities of the world, so that they deviate from the direction, only remember how to "blind date", but gradually forget how to love.
Later, when I thought about this movie, I once forgot whether it was "love and love" or "love and love", and then I gradually realized that maybe this is the purpose of Zhang Aijia's use of "Love and Affection" to name this movie: to tell us that no matter when, do not forget how to love, especially between husband and wife.
Grandpa chose love, and Huiying's husband chose responsibility and family.
But they all had a happy ending.
So, what do you mean by happiness?
Probably not defined.
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Vivi's boyfriend, Ada, is a resident singer.
Grandpa did not send Azu a penny to support the family, and even sent 5 yuan more for her to make a jacket.
But Grandpa always regarded Azu as a relative and a family member.
Ada had also given all his savings to another woman.
But Ada is willing to stop chasing her dreams for Vivi and stay in a second-tier city to live in a bad mood.
So, when you say love and responsibility, which is more important?
Ada tried to lie in the coffin that Azu had prepared for himself, and he thought that he might enter a secular marriage, and since then he had buried his ideals and pursuits, and numbness and fear were deeply shrouded in him.
He cried and decided to leave.
Some people say that in a family, if the mother is too strong, the son will be cowardly, and the daughter will be as strong as her mother.
What Vivi is most afraid of hearing is: how do you look like your mother.
Girls who are in adolescence, rebellious and self-reliant, exalt the unique vitality of youth, but also have a deep uneasiness and confusion about the future at that age.
While she was sure she could support herself, she asked Ada over and over again how much she had saved.
She faced her boyfriend's departure from Beijing, saying "I will not wait for you", while telling her mother that I would wait for him for the rest of my life.
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Some people say: Watching "Love and Affection" is like drinking a cup of tea.
The taste is strong at first, and the middle section is warm. After the epilogue, the aftertaste is endless.
On its poster, it reads:
She believed all her life
I believe in one word
You only believe, for a moment
It summarizes the three states of three women in three eras.
They are similar in many places, but the subtleties are different.
This is a very good literary and artistic film, with a combination of parents and shorts, and reasonable law. Filmed in Zhengzhou, I personally feel that it is a good movie that has been seriously underestimated, and it is highly recommended to watch it.
When you are young, you always see what is what is, and you don't know how to look at problems with the perspective of development, such as a person, a city, a relationship.