Record, live forever
Text/Hou Yaxuan
(Web Photo)
March 30 is different from usual, due to the epidemic, the school began online classes for the safety of teachers and students, and the student atmosphere was very different, and the voices of students were heard from time to time in the dormitory corridors. The only thing that does not match this is today's weather, the air is the smell of dirt left over from last night's rain, it is fresh, the whole sky looks gray, as if it is shrouded in an invisible net, for me who does not like rain, this scene is really not cheering.
At the end of the day, most of the class time is not boring, but I am a bit lazy compared to the classroom. In the evening, the sky is getting dark, there is always an unrealistic feeling in the dormitory in the early morning, the mobile phone message prompt tone pulls me out of this fantasy, looking at the information that jumped to the desktop, it was sent by my mother, three green dialog boxes, only a quick catch: LZ brother is gone. (Brother LZ is the grandson of My Mother's Uncle and a soldier I call my cousin!) ）
Seeing this sentence, I only felt that my brain "boomed" a blank, and then various pictures flashed, and Brother Z posted photos in the circle of friends on holidays, telling me to study hard in the video call... Every brightly colored picture tells me a bloody truth that we will never see again. In just a few seconds, I began to slowly accept this fact, and I also complained to myself that when a living life disappeared, our language was so scarce, this was the end of life, it seemed to be far away from us, but it did not know in which dark corner coveted our most precious things.
Looking back at my mother's message, I wanted to delve into a series of questions: Why did such a thing happen suddenly? What is the cause of death? But I can't get out the doubts in my heart, there is always a trace of luck, thinking that as long as I don't take this step, people will come back to life. Slowly found this idea a little funny, or asked the mother about the whole incident, Brother Z was in the army on a mission diving accident, the specific need to go to the army to understand, the heavy topic of this conversation did not last long, and the mother said goodnight, then lay down in his own small bed, trying to isolate himself from this noisy world.
Closing my eyes is the cold green dialog box, suddenly thinking that the book that Brother Z bought for me has not yet been read, as if I have found an outlet to vent, the pillow towel is getting wet, and the mood of family love has reached its peak at this moment, and I want to go home. If tomorrow is the end of the world, then I won't be able to see my mother, father and brother, but what about Brother Z? When performing organizational tasks, have you ever thought that there will be an accident, have you ever wanted to meet your family, have you had an unfulfilled wish... But these problems cannot be found now. The night is getting darker, more quiet, and the brain is groggy and gradually falls asleep.
The next day, he learned more details from his mother's mouth: Brother Z saw the courage of the righteous when he was on a mission, and in order to save his comrades-in-arms, he caused his oxygen cylinder to be broken, leaving himself in the cold sea. When I learned that the whole thing had passed, I did not have the joy of seeing the truth, and what came from it was pain and heartache, and more admiration. In that situation, Brother Z chose another life, but no one went to save his parents who were suffering from the loss of their son! They will be told that their son is brave and self-sacrificing, but no one wants to exchange their flesh and blood for these beautiful praises.
Only when the pain occurs to you, you will be deeply involved in it. I had never understood before that after this kind of thing happened, my relatives would still ask for compensation, and why should I mix interests in what was obviously a great and glorious thing. However, when I experienced it myself, I realized that no amount of compensation is equal, and if I can, I believe that every parent wants their children to be safe even if they give everything they have. But no, there is no room for redemption.
It has been two days since I wrote these words, but the emotions are even stronger. Brother Z is in the university to come to the troops, and then admitted to the military academy, subordinate to the Navy Special Forces, really good prestige, to come here Brother Z paid more than others, watching the target getting closer and closer must be happy! Brother Z's constant pursuit eventually took him away. A few words is a lifetime, nothing is born heroic, but some people choose to be fearless. I guess he didn't regret it, he dedicated his life to his life's goal, which is crazy, it is warm, it is worthy of being respected, and it is worth remembering!
The end of life means the disappearance of no news, so this is the beginning of another kind of life, comrades-in-arms will continue to walk in his footsteps, and will always exist in our hearts!
May the deceased rest in peace, the mountains and rivers be unharmed, and there will be no national martyrdom after the spring flowers bloom!
【About the author】Hou Yaxuan, a freshman girl.