Author/Pond Fish
When I met a girl, she asked me this question again: It's been two months, how can I forget the past and start over?
I told her that, actually, you miss someone and you start a new life, and the two are not in conflict.
One point I've always stressed is that loss of love is not the same as amnesia.
If you're with someone, as long as you've ever given it with sincerity, no matter how long you've been apart, you can't forget it. But it doesn't matter, you can take the memory of this person with you, and for the rest of your life, go on well, along with those beautiful fantasies that were unattainable in the past, you can also keep them well. After all, there will be another person who will give you the romance of love alone.
At that time, when you really remember everything, if you can look at every past encounter and miss with a grateful attitude, you can clearly realize that you have grown up, and you can rationally look at the separation.
Then, you will find that all the problems that have plagued you will be solved.
Regarding regrets in love, in fact, many times, it may be some shackles and difficulties that you have given yourself.
However, in this lifetime, what cannot be escaped is often the obsession with the individual.
Once on the Internet, I saw such a passage:
Over the years, his image in my heart has sometimes been extremely hateful, and sometimes it has become pure and incomparable. My love for him, in fact, has long disappeared, becoming nostalgia, pain, jealousy, sympathy, desire, and constant circulation. But not a second, my feelings for him, not a second.
At that time, when I saw this sentence, my heart was inexplicably sour. I think you can only feel this way if you have really fallen in love with someone and separated.
Believe it or not, in fact, many people in life, they have never really fallen in love with a person, and they have never been really loved by others, so when they talk about love, they are full of routines and lies, they are dismissive, they are sarcastic, they are crazy who think they are awake.
Yes, there may be some people who, indeed, do not need love, can live well. But as long as you need, I hope you can stick to your needs, but also be able to adhere to the expectations and beauty in your heart.
Sometimes, whether it is really missed or obsessed, everyone lives in the world, and there must be a period of stupidity and innocence. As for these days, whether it is good or bad depends on how you see it.
You don't have to care what outsiders say, because what you ultimately need to convince is your heart.
Suddenly remembered, last night I brushed a post on the Internet, is a boy told his affection for his first love, said that it is the first love, just his unilateral crush, the girl does not know that he likes her, he has never confessed, but he silently did a lot of things for her.
I read it at that time, full of emotion, the boy was just in his early 20s, I saw a teenager in the youth of the unbridled bright, brave to pay, just like once saw a sentence: this has never been my flower, but I in the best days, also passed through the bloom of flowers.
However, there is a netizen who said such a sentence: You are clearly called licking the dog.
I don't think so, I think every affectionate person deserves respect.
In fact, when he pays, not only is the licking behavior seen by others, but the most important thing is that he himself should be happy in this process.
It's just that those who have never been stingy in paying and paying too much attention to returns do not understand this truth at all.
As long as you can be relieved, no matter what you have paid in love, to put it bluntly, it is your love and my wishes, as long as you are happy and willing, as for what outsiders say, you can not care, because later you will understand: compared to the regrets after that, you are more pleased that you were fortunate to do something.
Because those years of life, will not be repeated a second time. Because of this, all experiences are worth remembering, even if they are lost.
What exactly is true love? In fact, when you really fall in love with someone, after separation, you will most likely leave a trace: this relationship, you will always miss.
But do you miss the person you were? Not. What you miss the most is actually the feeling that you liked this person when you didn't hesitate to do so.
Coming home for the New Year, meeting a high school classmate who had played well, sitting in a café and chatting for an afternoon, we talked about many things about each other, naturally including feelings.
She talked about the complicated psychology of her ex. She separated from her ex half a year ago, because she found that the other party and a schoolgirl chat particularly ambiguous, but also often delete chat records, their relationship of almost 5 years, and finally because of this incident became the fuse, more problems continued to erupt, and finally parted ways.
After the separation, everyone around her scolded her ex as a scumbag, and she followed the scolding at first, but later when she gradually calmed down, when others scolded the boy again, she subconsciously developed a psychology of maintenance.
Later, her girlfriend thought that she had not yet put it down, so she would defend the scumbag, she said no, her girlfriend firmly believed that she just did not put it down, so she did not explain too much.
In fact, I can understand her mentality, she should indeed not be unable to let go of her ex, just like when I talked to her, I asked her: Then do you really let go?
She still didn't hesitate: I thought I had let go. But I will not forget him, because in this life I should never like someone like him again.
Her ex, who is also her first love, she had no reservations, loved each other even more than she loved herself, so when she first came out of this matter, it can be said that she had half a life, and now she can finally be calm, sometimes she still thinks of the past of the two people, but now her heart is like water, she no longer shed tears and sentimentality.
What she maintains is the prototype of beautiful love that she has kept in her mind, this love, her ex was once a carrier, because she is still willing to believe in beauty, so she will subconsciously maintain him.
Yes, true love a person, after separation you will not denigrate, and you will not blame the other party for the mistake, and even with the lengthening of the separation time, the person's bad will gradually be diluted. When you think about it later, it is more of his good, his carefulness and gentleness, and the happy time you have together, you will let go of some of the bad things he once did to you, because you finally realized that you in the past were still not perfect.
The person who has truly loved and finally let go, no matter what the outcome, will give two people the best fulfillment of the past of love, and this is also the fulfillment of themselves.
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