"Min, you can trust me, but you can't rely on me completely..."
When this sentence came out of Xiao Min's boyfriend, Xiao Min was a little incredulous. But remembering the bits and pieces of getting along with him is indeed a practice.
When Xiao Min's work encountered a bottleneck and was anxious, he did not say boldly: "Isn't it just a job?" Just quit, I'll raise you later! Instead, like an elder, he said in a serious tone, "Min, don't give up!" Think hard about how to find a breakthrough, find a solution, and I'm sure you can overcome them! ”
When Xiao Min was examining for certified public accountants, he encountered a problem, scratched his ears and cheeks, and asked him for advice, he smiled and said softly: "I think you should check the information more and patiently solve it!" So be it! I'm going to boil a bowl of silver ear soup to refresh you. ”
Xiao Min's boyfriend is versatile and golden, and is a small business owner with a flexible mind. As Xiaomin's boyfriend, he does take care of her in life, but in other aspects, Xiaomin feels that he is a little unkind, such as in study and work, when he asks for help, he always asks Xiaomin not to rely on him, and always lets her find a way to solve it by herself. At the beginning, Xiaomin wanted to be a small finance in his small company, but he still resolutely disagreed and said that it was not suitable for Xiaomin's career development.
Xiaomin's boyfriend often said to her: "I hope you are a new age woman with independence, self-respect and self-love, and a career, if one day we are separated, I hope you live better and find a better partner than me." 」
After listening to the story of Xiaomin and her boyfriend, I suddenly came up with a classic confession of Jane Eyre to Rochester in the famous book "Jane Eyre";
"Do you think that because I am poor, low, unbeautiful, and short, I have no soul and no heart?" You're wrong! My soul is the same as yours, and my heart is exactly the same as yours! If God had given me a little beauty and a little wealth, I would have made it as difficult for you to leave me as it is for me to leave you now. I speak to you now, not through customs, conventions, not even through the flesh of mortals—but through my spirit speaking to your spirit; it is as if both passed through the grave, and we stand at the feet of God and are equal—because we are equal! ”
I think the most perfect love should be the same three views, equal strength, equality and independence, and each has its own pursuit. Like Xiaomin's boyfriend, he will not treat Xiaomin as a free nanny, nor will he use Xiaomin as a "canary" to keep in captivity. He hopes that Xiaomin has her own career, her own pursuits, and strives to realize the value of her life. Such a wise boyfriend, as a woman, should cherish it.
I remember a discussion before: if your husband gives you 100,000 yuan a month for living expenses, you don't have to do anything, just take the children, go shopping, buy clothes, do beauty, but your husband will never accompany you, are you willing?
As a result, many netizens who are bao moms said that such a life is really cool. But I personally think that in fact, such a life is "full of dangers", first of all, how can you be sure that this husband is not in accidents, and continue to give living expenses until the end of your life? Secondly, if you have been living in a series of consumptions such as taking children, shopping, buying clothes, and doing beauty. Well, I tell you, at first you may feel cool and fresh, but over time, you will get tired of this life. And while you are tired, your earning power will gradually lose over time. Of course, if you know how to plan this "easy" living expenses, that's a different story. However, you have to pay attention to the stem of this so-called problem contains the word "if", so in terms of probability, such a husband is actually very small. So, let's wake up and move the bricks well!
But if I translate the above questions into "Husband A gives you 100,000 yuan a month for living expenses, and Husband B gives you the ability to earn 100,000 yuan per month, which kind of husband do you choose?" ”
I'm sure the vast majority of sensible women will not hesitate to choose "B husband!" After all, "it is better to give them fish than to teach them to fish", relying on their own ability to obtain is always more confident than relying on others to give, and self-reliance and independence are always more dignified than relying on others to give.
But there are always people who want to get something for nothing, empty gloves white wolf. Therefore, there will be men in this world who are eager to find a free nanny who will not only make money but also take care of their families, while women are eager to become "canaries" that men keep in captivity in the golden nest. Blindly asking for each other will only quietly plant a "time bomb" in the feelings of both parties, and one day, it will explode and collapse. Therefore, as adults, we must be soberly aware that a relationship that continues to give but is not rewarded will not last long.
Therefore, regardless of men and women, we must be economically independent, do not try to ask each other indefinitely through love, and we must not kidnap each other because of love.
I would prefer that both men and women don't let the other person say, "You can trust me, but you can't rely on me completely!" Instead, he took the initiative to say to the other party, "I will trust you, but I will not rely on you completely!" "It sounds more warm and powerful, and shows that you are a cute person with independent self-esteem."
There is nothing more beautiful than love: I love you, but I hope that you will love yourself well, no matter when and where.
——END——
Author: Antarctic water, left hand piano and chess calligraphy and painting, right hand chai rice oil and salt, live with heart, with love to raise children.
The pictures in this article come from the network, original articles, plagiarism must be investigated, if you need to reprint, please contact this platform.