Out of the "Hudu Gate", the person is another self| noon mailbox

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1

Dear Noon,

Good morning/afternoon/evening!

Are idle young people always unable to escape self-pity? After a brief study of psychoanalysis, it was found that the psychological problems were nothing more than peeling onions in contradictions.

On the one hand, I am anxious about my age, on the other hand, I feel that I am just a 24-year-old young man, and so on... I believe that the editors also have different degrees of contradictions, think like this, feel that they have been worried that they are too unhappy, and exploring their hearts is not with their own car.

I am a member of this year's examination and research army, anxious about the dilemma of zero work experience after graduating at the age of 27, watching everyone in 96 have been working for almost two years, and I am still waiting for results. There is no intention of letting the editors take the time to enlighten, but this unspeakable dilemma makes me unable to talk to my friends very well, hoping that noon can reply to me with a sentence of "It doesn't matter, 96 years is okay." "It's just that people in our society should be very difficult not to seek the approval of others." In fact, I didn't graduate at the age of 25, it was caused by my own mistakes, thinking like this, there is nothing left, age is the price of suffering. However, this year has not yet scored points, I still don't daydream.

Youth is wasted, one year, two years, or even three years. Unfortunately, there is nothing that can be done, and as said in "One by One", there is no change in doing it again.

"Chicken soup" has seen too much, and I have become desensitized, and I am overly dependent on the influence of the outside world, even if it is a person in our society, it is very sad. So, hopefully, we can all find a balance between the inside and the outside.

It is always like this, and there is an urge to cry in exhaustion, but maybe it is the tears of emotion! You can start your life again at any time, and you can't compromise!

Have a nice day！

NN

NOON Reply:

NN Hello,

If you want to calculate the age account, you have to calculate the larger one. The effective working age of modern people, at least 70 years old. You have 46 years left.

At this length of time, you can think about whether there is enough time to do the things you want to do.

Tang Xiaosong

2

Hello Noon,

I am a medical student in my fifth year, and the arrangement of the first year of my freshman year is to intern in the hospital, and I have spent the last semester in the graduate school and internship, and the days are repeated day by day. It can be imagined that if there is no outbreak of pneumonia, there will be some certain things waiting for me to complete one by one in my life: follow the teacher in the ward to check the room, write and write about the case, ask questions in the outpatient clinic, after some routine training, practice some skill operations, prepare for the re-examination step by step, take graduation photos with friends in the middle, and imagine the graduation trip together.

The first time I heard that this pneumonia was in the intensive care unit of the pediatric department, the teacher mentioned that it was to be vigilant that the child's fever may be caused by "pneumonia of unknown cause". At that time, I heard only a few words in the news and a few words from the teacher's mouth, which did not attract my attention, let alone think that the illness was menacing and had such a great impact. Now that I think about it, the hospital in Wuhan was already facing a very serious situation at that time, and the medical knowledge learned in the past four years was as light as a feather because there was not enough practical experience.

A few days after returning home for the New Year, I thought that I would soon be able to continue to return to the hospital for internship, but I did not expect to receive a notice from the school prohibiting early return to school. During my time at home, I also imagined many times that if this pneumonia happened a year later, I would also put on a protective suit and go to the front line and participate in the battle. My friend cared about me and asked if I had been arranged to go on duty in the hospital, and I said that because of my lack of experience, I could not go to the front line, which was also the school protecting us, and he was very happy. I often have two mixed feelings in my mind, one is that I feel lucky to be able to live a healthy life, breathe freely, and not have to go through the risk of infection; the other is to feel ashamed of this sense of happiness. When I saw my friend express this happiness, it seemed that all I could do was shame in my heart.

My brain automatically activated the mechanism to avoid this feeling of shame, and I uninstalled Weibo and stopped paying attention to the news that reported the pneumonia epidemic, and instead I started watching many TV series, movies, stand-up comedies and novels, as if I could feed my soul with stories. But recently I've also come to realize that this isn't a long-term solution, because stories that are compelling are always great, and my life is full of boredom and even guilt.

Recently watching the anime "Rick and Morty", the counselor said to Rick, who turned into a cucumber: I can understand that you will be bored with psychological counseling, just like people will get tired of brushing their teeth and wiping their butts, because even if you do these things wrongly, it will not cause death, this is just a daily routine. The difference is that some people don't care, they can tolerate boredom, while some people prefer to go on a deadly expedition rather than put up with boredom.

For me, the foreseeable pieces of work, while boring, are bearable. What this pandemic has taught me is to endure the time after I don't need to complete the work I set out, and to think about the value and meaning of my own existence after stripping away my daily work.

Good health

ridikullus

Hello ridikullus,

Society has requirements for people, but individuals also have their own inner needs, and the two are not the same thing.

The inner needs of participating in social affairs are different for everyone. I think it's determined by human nature rather than professionalism. The heart is in the temple, and the heart is in the mountains. Everyone may actually find a suitable position for themselves, but most people will not understand this truth for a lifetime.

It's like in a disaster movie, you need to find a role that really suits you out of hundreds of thousands of characters. This is not an easy task. You need to know both the movie and yourself. In this way, it is possible to find the position that really belongs to you.

It will be a long and arduous process.

The relationship between man and society, in times of calamity, in times of peace, is the same.

3

Friends at noon:

Zhan Xin Jia!

To be honest, almost everything in my job allows me to express, to express this, to express that, but rarely to express myself.

Thinking about it, writing to you seems to be an outlet for me to express myself. Yesterday I came back from a business trip, the moment I left the airport, I saw the people who picked up the airport and held up the sign, and suddenly felt very sad. For a long time in the past, from college to work, whenever the other person was free, he would come to the airport to pick me up. But not long ago, we ended this long relationship, calm, no one complained, no quarrel, almost no retention, very kindly ended this relationship, in the others think, I myself also think, we will get married.

I know that this relationship has come to an end, and even every time I think about it, I feel as if I have witnessed the disappearance of my feelings, and I feel very sad to witness this disappearance. I don't know why, I often think of him recently, maybe because of the pressure of work, or maybe because of the recent poor health, I just secretly turned over his circle of friends, read a few, and it is sad to feel that he seems to be happier than when he was with me.

I'm good or bad, but I see that my circle of friends is also light, no different from the past. We who are adults are so hypocritical. I didn't expect him to have a bad time, but I felt so sad to see him live so easily.

Before going to a friend's house to play, she and her boyfriend had a very fierce argument because of some small things, I was very embarrassed at the time, they quarreled quickly reconciled, I couldn't help but think: I seem to have never had such a fierce quarrel with each other. Once he said that I was aggressive, and then when I was very angry, I held back and calmly talked to him, but it was useless to calm down and talk to him calmly. I thought that this was a relationship, and then I found that it was really sad that couples who did not even dare to quarrel were really sad, but I seriously and sadly managed this relationship for a long time.

After leaving him, I always wanted to fall in love, and I felt that it was very boring to fall in love, I did not do a good job of meeting the state of feelings, I was with him for too long, the most important period of my youth was spent with him, and I really felt really dazed after leaving. He was the most ordinary person, I was also the most ordinary person, we were the most ordinary couple under the heavens together, and then ordinary ended the relationship. But those encounters, companionship, sadness and hurt are all true, and I sometimes wonder if I have to meet the next person like this, that is really exhausting.

I'm really sorry, I'm so sad, if you make you feel unhappy when you see this letter, can you say sorry? I also hope that you who see the letter can meet a precious relationship and go on with the other party's preciousness.

I caught the wrong person and lost a long time, of course, very sad, but I do not regret it. Thank you for listening to me and wishing you all the best.

Not a chestnut jun of chestnuts

Not a chestnut chestnut jun, hello,

See if you want love or marriage. Love usually has to jump recklessly, and marriage usually has all kinds of protective measures.

For some people, at the age of twenty or thirty, love is a pit that brings the greatest pain to people. But after this age, you will find that there are still bigger pits after bigger holes, round after round of greater pain waiting for you. At that time, love will not be the only important thing in life. Many people also know how to face it.

That is, in the process of dealing with pain, people will slowly know themselves and become themselves.

4

Good afternoon,

Zhan Xinjia.

I have been paying attention to noon for a long time, the first time I wrote a letter, nothing else, I wanted to spit on myself. Same with many people. I'm an older single dog who doesn't seek motivation, is lazy, incompetent, and addicted to daydreaming. I am now doing a boring audit job that barely keeps me fed.

There are many choices in life, and I have made mistakes in every choice in life. When I took the college entrance examination, I did not do well in the examination, and I refused to re-read. When I graduated from college, because my family's financial conditions were not good, I gave up graduate school. When I was working, I entered a very famous state-owned enterprise, but because I worked too much overtime, I felt that the work was depressing, and I quit my job. And the work behind me, one after another, is not as good as before. After five or six years of work, without a dime of savings, I will always eat and eat. I was lazy, ugly, and the working environment was a group of girls, people and houses. Over time, looking at Ben San, he was still a single dog. My family urged me for a year or two, and now they have given up on me.

Many times, I often wonder why people live and why they live. I couldn't find the meaning of being alive. People have lived for almost thirty years, and I feel that my life is a failure. I have a bad temper and grew up with no friends. The only two friends, as they grew older, were completely out of touch. The work has not improved so far, there is no favorite, and there is no one who is good at it. My life summed up as a history of failure. Whenever I see colleagues around me, former classmates, one by one career love double harvest, I will think, like me, what is the purpose of living. Other people's lives are colorful, while my life is always gray. This is me, this is my failed life.

Residual wings

Hello Wing remnants,

No need to prove yourself to friends and family. Success at the societal level, don't do it.

But when you come to the world, when you face yourself, should you have an explanation? Or should we live religiously to achieve an inner peace and balance?

This is also possible after solving many problems.

5

Happy New Year at noon!

I have been paying attention to noon for a few years, and I like to look at the noon mailbox when I am depressed, probably because after reading it, I think that my occasional moody is actually very normal.

I've always wanted to contribute to the noon mailbox and write anything, so I wanted to talk to the noon newsroom. But this time, I really need the wisdom of noon to answer my recent confusion.

I am a Ben San girl who has been studying and working overseas for more than seven years, and recently suddenly returned from the United States because of work visa problems. During the period of visa problems, I actually had the opportunity to transfer to the company's overseas group to work for one to two years, and then apply for another visa and then return to the United States. The overseas groups that were recruiting at that time were Munich and Zurich. I gave up this opportunity. Although I am working in an Internet giant company with a pleasant and inclusive working atmosphere and good overtime and few benefits, if you want to keep this hard-won job and keep the green card you just applied for, this is the only chance.

I found myself a little resistant to exchanging this year or two for my comfortable, stable, smooth, and even happy American life.

How would you describe my life at that time?

I remember Shizushima writing in the preface to her first book, "There are always days in a year when there is a certain kind of collapse in my heart that is similar to writing poetry, getting drunk, crying for no reason, and giving up completely, and at that moment I understand that no matter how I treat my dreams with contempt, ridicule, and betrayal, the reason why a dream is a dream is that it is difficult to extinguish and cannot be forgotten."

That's how I live, trying to tick the list of N things that need to be done in life, but there are always a few days in the year when I want to give up the life I started all over again.

Like all literary and artistic youths who are a little bit sensitive to expressing their desire to express themselves, I have a dream of being a writer. Writing is the most effortless thing I've ever been able to stick to as an adult. It is my faithful listener, a shield against trivial life, a haven in times of frustration. Although I have never received systematic writing training except for online writing classes, and I have also studied engineering in college and graduate school, the little flame in my heart has never been extinguished, and I always feel that life will eventually deal with words.

It may be that you used to be young, carefree, always thinking about the opportunity to choose from a lot of options in the future. But at this point in time, suddenly the first batch of post-90s are 30 years old, and I began to fear that I would go on like this step by step, and if I didn't live according to my own heart, I would live my life in a muddy state.

So at that time, the visa was not smooth, and I did not have enthusiasm for work, subconsciously felt that I would change the environment and return to my native language country without identity restrictions, maybe there would be a different development. Now that I think about it, this mentality may also contain a certain kind of escapism.

After returning to China, there was suddenly no restriction on status (in the United States, in order to get a work visa, I could only find a job that was consistent with my major), and in the face of the vast job market, hundreds of jobs, I lost my direction.

Immediately switched to the print media industry? Regardless of the difference between my professional skills and the Chinese department of writing workers with work experience, can I withstand the sluggish market prospects and propositional composition-like work content (if I want to use this as a profession, I can't write what I want to write for a long time)?

Continue to do the old business - program yuan? Can I take the time to read, write and contribute at the 996 work cadence? Will it fall into the same predicament as before?

Maybe I can use my English foundation to start with book translation? This job is not bad, you can not only read happily, but also exercise your writing organization skills when translating, laying the foundation for writing your own work. After learning about the situation with some translators, I found that the original full-time book translators did not have enough to eat, and many of them were part-time.

Should I read another book, study a language major, and then engage in related work (interpretation, translation)?

I'm sorry to make the editor laugh, an old girl who will pass the threshold in two years, but what to do is a decision at the age of 18, what will be done in the future?

I'm easily moved by stories that encourage people to "have the courage to start over," but I don't dare to rely heavily on how I feel in the moment, and "love" is a subjective and uncontrollable thing, and neither of you nor I know when it will suddenly strengthen or weaken, or even disappear. A few days ago, I watched Imatoshi's "My Dream Road", and I was very envious of those who knew what they were going to do since childhood, those who "seemed to be given a mission" life trajectory, and the feeling of running towards the goal was reassuring even if it was tired.

Thank you for receiving the letter and listening to me so much! Hopefully, I don't let you who read the letter too disappointed. The beginning of this year is not peaceful, many things are more let people feel the smallness and preciousness of life, I hope that everyone is safe and healthy.

Very eager to receive a reply

Second Master Brother

Hello Second Master Brother,

When I first started working as a print media in 2001, I was very troubled. Later, I realized that shifting from personal literary writing to mass media writing requires abandoning the personal value system and using the value system positioned by the media when writing through self-hypnosis.

In Cantonese opera, the stage where the actor appears is called "HuduMen", and when he goes out of that stage, the person is another soul, and he has to put himself aside for the time being.

I have been working in print media for 13 years, and my personal mind and will have been greatly improved; I have experienced many life experiences throughout the ages. But there is very little improvement in literary accomplishment, and there is always a pain of not being able to do itself.

For your reference.

—— End ——

Tang Xiaosong, former deputy editor of GQ Magazine, has 13 years of experience in men's magazines. In 2015, he began to engage in various creations such as art photography and literature. 2019 China Port Museum "Port and Video II" Participating Artists. In 2019, a biographical book he participated in was selected as a sub-list of "Top Ten Good Books of Sanlian Bookstore in 2019".

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