No matter how we live our lives, there will be times when we want to change.
Some people have procrastination and want to be diligent. Some people feel fat and often think about losing weight. Some people often stay up late, and every day before going to bed, they think about going to bed early and getting up early.
When we want to work in a better direction, there is also a resistance in our hearts.
And these psychological states that prevent us from changing actually come from the psychological defense mechanisms in our hearts.
The psychological defense mechanism in our hearts, the pursuit of stability and stability, wants to make everything around us in our own control.
If we can understand how to overcome these difficulties, we can also tap our potential and become a better version of ourselves.
Learn to take the first step
The reason for accumulating a lot and accumulating over time is actually understood by everyone, but there are very few people who can really stick to it.
Because even if you know these truths, life and the future are always full of many unknowns and challenges.
At this time, the psychological defense mechanism will be activated, and we will always want to say that if we want to complete this thing, we will encounter this trouble, and we will encounter that dilemma.
Whenever we think about these risks, our hearts shake. The fear and anxiety that arises can also directly lead us to stay in our comfort zone and never be able to take the first step.
If you want to become a better version of yourself, you need to learn to take the first step, and only by taking the first step is the beginning of successful change.
In psychology, there is a way called "miracle questioning."
Don't think about what problems you will encounter on the road to success. In turn, imagine the picture of success, imagine that you have succeeded, and look back at your past.
How did you achieve your goals? What are the first conditions and behaviors that drive your own success?
This can help us find the first thing that can be done now from the confused future, and it can also give us a rough plan for the future and more expectations for the future.
Set small, accomplishable goals
In psychology, we call our confidence in accomplishing a job self-efficacy. The stronger a person's sense of self-efficacy, the more confident they will be in themselves when they accomplish something.
If you're a less confident person, set yourself small, simple, actionable goals in the beginning. Don't set yourself goals that are too high to be achieved.
Because self-efficacy will be constantly changing in our daily experience. After success, self-efficacy increases. After experiencing setbacks, self-efficacy decreases.
Success doesn't have to be a good result. Because it only takes a little success to give us a sense of accomplishment.
If you set your goals too high at the beginning, it will be difficult for yourself to complete. Then it is too difficult to complete, and constantly experiencing setbacks will make you lose confidence.
People who are stronger in their hearts may be more and more courageous. But no matter how strong a person is, he cannot withstand long-term setbacks.
Over time, people will inevitably doubt their own ability and doubt whether they are suitable for doing this.
Start by setting some simple goals for yourself, and when you experience success, then continue to increase the difficulty and challenge yourself according to your own situation.
Look for a more suitable environment
In the process of making efforts, taking the first step is not the most difficult, and it is more difficult to maintain this state of change for a long time.
Have you ever had a similar experience?
When I was a student, every Friday of the week, when you brought home your books, you would think, "This weekend, I'm going to review my homework." ”
But when you get home, computers, cell phones, and toys will always leave your reading behind. When we were studying, our teachers called this phenomenon "the temptation to go home."
Sometimes, the environment we are in is too comfortable and hinders our change.
If you want to make yourself better at persevering, you have to find an environment that suits you.
For example, in the college era, most students who want to study well will choose to go to the library or study room. Because in the study room, everyone is reading, and when we enter this environment, we will read more seriously.
If you also want to create an environment at home that is more suitable for hard work. Find a room or a table and make a rule for yourself.
Here, you have to put down your phone and just read or work. You can also post some words of motivation in this environment to create a more suitable environment for yourself.
If you want to rest and relax, you need to change the environment and can't rest in the place where you work.
As long as you stick to it for a short period of time, this environment will also become your perfect focus environment.
Believe that you are a person who is willing to work hard, if you can stick to this effort, I believe that success is not far away from you.
I hope you can find a better version of yourself.
I am a little bear, grateful for the unexpected encounter with you in the vast sea of people.
If you feel that the article is helpful to you, or if you feel empathy, I look forward to the cute you to like it.
You are welcome to share your opinion, and Bear is looking forward to finding a resonance with you.