Man always expects something unusual to happen, like a cat's eye, forever waiting for the moment when he catches his prey; in our hearts, we learn an inertia from nowhere, as if it must boil the calm air to be interesting.
Sometimes I feel that my heart is like some concubines living in the ancient mansion who are afraid of idleness and nothing to do, because the world is too peaceful and uneventful, the gloomy air in the deep mansion compound is idle and moldy, so I tried my best to make a storm, probing the east and provoking the west, so that I felt that I was alive and had something to do.
When you are busy panting, you will remember that there are some calm and trivial times in life, like duckweed on turbid water, a little green, so that the stagnant water has more breathing.
Trivial times, like commas in words.
Since childhood, I have been accustomed to the law that doing nothing is immoral. It prevents us from appreciating the beauty of doing nothing, or doing little things; not doing anything serious makes me feel guilty.
I think many people have a similar experience, do not want to do anything, but can not calmly face the tranquility, so turn away the TV, let the sound and light painting unconsciously occupy. You don't want to watch, and you don't want to close.
"It's better to have a sound than no sound." Some friends who remain single and live alone explain the behavior of turning on the TV when they return home.
Afraid of no sound, and afraid of too much involvement in their own real emotions of the sound; husbands shouting at their wives noisy, children crying, for them is a high decibel noise that will kill a good life.
Afraid of the cross-current of the seven passions and six desires, but unable to subdue the seven passions and six desires.
Talking about national events, life plans, and work plans, I don't know how to face the tranquility of a room on a night when I don't go home too early; how to plan alone after a certain sun-vicious Sunday.
This is also the dilemma I have faced. Ambitious, but full of sorrow for trivial life.
I used to be a workaholic. The best way to diagnose a workaholic is to see if he is afraid of weekends and Sundays, and whether he has the "don't know" when he faces the end of work.
It's not just single people who suffer so much, but many people who have become a family are also infected with "fear of weekend syndrome" and "after-work depression".
For a long time I didn't realize that I had this "disease". I work hard and never suffer from overtime; even when I get home, I sit at my computer desk as diligently as I try to accomplish something; I use busy worksheets to get through indigestible emotional blows, "I'm busy" to push off some "Hongmen Feast"-style meals, and "No time, I'm sorry, another day" to postpone certain results that will make me unhappy. Why don't I dare say no? Use "busy" to have a solid reason to say no!
I've used busyness as a barrier to cover up all kinds of real crux of the matter. However, it is like a person who suspects that he has diabetes, and when he walks into the medical laboratory, he tries to rush into the test cup with tap water, hoping not to test the real results - I will give this example, a doctor told me a real thing.
Busy, busy for your own ideals or not to disappoint others? There is a song that has been sung in the hearts of many urban people, I can probably add an additional question to it: Busy, busy, busy to cover up the truth of pain or not to let yourself panic? Busy, knowing that greed can not chew rotten.
I learned many skills since I was a child, trying to become versatile, but I didn't learn how to face myself when I was alone.
Almost everyone in our generation either grew up in a "rich family of index fingers", or they cried and were coaxed, some people scolded when they did wrong, and few people learned what to do when they were alone. Some people have lived for decades without being "truly alone" for more than five minutes — watching TV, videotape, playing on the computer, reading magazines or books alone to pass the time. When doing the above things, most of our hearts are in a hurry, but we just want to do something to pass the time and fill the emptiness, and we can't enjoy the beauty of trivial times.
I'm still learning about how to get along with myself. If I were to take it as a course, I would probably be the most unqualified student.
I was too anxious, too afraid of wasting time, afraid of not achieving anything, so for a long time, I used "busy" to waste time.
I began to learn to enjoy quiet times, trivial things. Because of a passage that Osho said: To be alive is such a wonderful gift, but no one ever tells you to be thankful for existence, on the contrary, everyone is unhappy and complains.
It turned out I was restrained. I always feel that what I am now is not enough, something is lacking, I should go somewhere and become some kind of person...
Osho says: Our natural instincts are thus turned and led astray. A calendula is anxious to bloom a rose, in addition to frustration only nervous, a little less, there is a sense of inferiority.
I felt like "five thunderbolts", so many years, I worked so hard, but I didn't know who I was. I live in a hurry, just as I just want to finish it when I drink coffee and have not enjoyed it; I only want to reach my destination when I walk, but I am not aware that I am walking.
I slowly learned the mystery of solitude.
When I discovered that "I still smile as a person," I began to appreciate that life is such a wonderful gift.
Life is such a wonderful gift. In Bali, where the seasons are hot.
An island that still devoutly adheres to the Pantheon Religion.
I often want to fly to that island, because the Balinese air is always filled with calm and warm air. I have not seen the inhabitants of any place who know better than the people here to enjoy life, not to the material riches or barrenness; the happy and unabashed smiles are always on their faces.
They have no idols, they worship God every day, they don't ask for anything concrete; they send them to death like a life, they celebrate happily, except for their dresses, which seem to be no different from weddings; they know how to live, and they will still smile at you if they don't make a bargain. Sleeping under a bamboo hut on a hot day, watching the dew on the lotus leaves on a rainy day, and bathing on the beach after the tide recedes, they treat strangers as good people. Tourism has developed for a hundred years, and there are only a few corrupt people.
They are happy. You see their yard is always full of flowers, they are natural gardeners.
Once, someone came back from Bali and told me what to recommend to that kind of "backward" country? He said that people in Bali have no bathrooms, and that men and women bathe in the same stream after the terraces, women wash upstream, men wash downstream, "pitiful"!
Only then did I realize that some people live in the same world as me on the surface, but in fact they live in two worlds, which cannot be said with each other, and when he still believes that the pursuit of civilization is the only right way, do not talk to him about the "people of Ge Tianshi". Where are they pitiful? We're pathetic!
They have been teaching me that life itself is a wonderful gift.
I'm learning, though it's not easy: I enjoy every word I write.
Drinking a cup of coffee is enjoyment, reading a book is enjoyment, having nothing to do is also enjoying life itself, and the trivial times in life are enjoyment.