On weekend mornings, I put on my journalist vest and double-sided storm jacket, put on a brown wig and black-rimmed glasses, reversed the bus twice, and went to the South City, ten kilometers away, and went straight to the wedding home selected in advance.
When greeting the bride's parents, they were dazed. I quickly explained that I was a foreign friend of the leader of the bride unit, traveled in the city, came to help with the fun, and experienced the customs and customs of the city.
They had a much kinder attitude, and hurriedly handed over cigarettes and poured tea to take dried fruits. I excused myself going to the balcony to see the view of the community, and when I passed the kitchen, I carried two bags of dried fruit into the pocket of the vest.
When the convoy arrived, the people in the house went downstairs, I pretended to answer the phone, casually slipped into the master bedroom, and saw two Chinese lines on the bedside table for hospitality, and I couldn't help but think about it.
After going downstairs, I took apart a Chinese cigarette and walked towards the welcoming motorcade. "Master driver, I'm sorry, the red envelope is small, and my family asked me to re-wrap it." I said apologetically as I smoked.
In the underground parking lot, I replaced the real money with the counting paper and sent the red envelope back. Several masters took the thicker red envelopes, happily stuffed them into their pockets, and talked to me enthusiastically.
I had a lot of chats, thinking about my next move. Who knew that there was a kind wedding car driver Xiao Liu, lest I not take his car to the wedding hotel, I couldn't help but drag me into his car.
When I got to the hotel bathroom, I stuffed the wig glasses vest dried fruit cigarette into the folding backpack. The coat was worn backwards, some blush was painted, and there was a red-faced balding uncle in the mirror.
Leaving the bag at the hotel bar, I entered the banquet hall and found the table of old and young women and children, and sure enough, the liquor was not cared for. I ate slowly, took the liquor apart, and poured it into the two drink bottles that I had drunk dry.
When the bride and groom began to toast from table to table, and the atmosphere was warm, I grabbed the drink bottle, ignored the contemptuous eyes on the table, and slowly got up and paced outside the banquet hall.
"Stop!" Shouting footsteps came from behind. It was the voice of the driver Xiao Liu. I pretended not to hear, quickened my pace, and was about to reach the door of the hall when a figure pounced on me.
My shoulder was hugged from behind, "He's the one who exchanged our red envelopes!" Xiao Liu shouted at everyone, "Don't let him run!" The bride and groom ran quickly toward me with a somber face.
"Release! You've identified the wrong person! I broke the driver's arm, smoothed the folded placket, turned back and squinted slowly around the angry newcomers and guests, dark and calm, with no fear.
"You old liar!" The angry bride waved her hand to slap me, and I grabbed my hand and threw it to the side, howling in pain. The groom kicked several times in quick succession, and I quickly dodged it.
"Stop! Don't move! I held my pocket high, and the crowd of onlookers did not dare to approach again. I stared at the driver Xiao Liu: "I changed your red envelope?" Is there any evidence? ”
"Evidence? Here you go! Xiao Liu excitedly took out the red envelope and tore it open forcefully, casually throwing it into the air, half-cut and half-cut slowly falling, not the banknote inspection paper, but the red tongtong hundred yuan bill!
Xiao Liu was dumbfounded, crouching on the ground while picking up money and saying to himself: "Am I reading it wrong?" Can't you? Trouble lifting feet! The bride and groom glanced at each other and hesitated.
"Don't you see that I brought some of your wine?" Back to you! I threw the drink bottle with my pocket at the groom, sneered and showed a press card, and pleaded indignantly:
"I am a native of Pengcheng, I came to the city to collect wind, spent two hundred red envelopes, ate your meal, and look at you, what quality!" When everyone was turning their heads and confused, they trotted out of the hall.
After taking my backpack at the hotel bar, I sneaked into the back kitchen of the hotel, and under the gaze of a group of stunned chefs, I found the back door of the hotel, went around the back of the neighborhood, and saw that no one was chasing me behind, and then I was relieved.
I shined the diamond ring I had been holding in my palm to the sun, smiled and put it on my shirt, hummed a little song out of the neighborhood, and saw a taxi on the side of the road, and the driver wore a duck-tongue hat.
"North City, Railway District." After saying the address, I closed my eyes and took a nap, and unconsciously fell asleep. When I woke up, I found myself sitting on the toilet in the bathroom partition of the wedding hotel!
The diamond ring, the money, the backpack were gone, the wig was on the head, the glasses were on the nose, the vest was on the body, the coat was worn back, and I hurriedly got up, but I felt that my hands and feet did not have any strength.
At this time, a bunch of drunkards coaxed into the bathroom, pulled the partition door one by one, and Xiao Liu's voice sounded: "That old liar, either the banknote detector paper or the counterfeit money, I will meet him and beat him to death!" ”
As the sun sets, a lonely figure walks on a dirt road on the eastern outskirts of the city with a bulging backpack, his duck-tongue hat obscuring his face, unable to see how old he is.
At the end of the dirt road is a piece of low occupancy of the farmhouse villa, one of the doors hung with a plaque Quiet Good Nursery, duck tongue hat put the backpack on the door, knocked the door.