When he was in school, Little Q did not dare to wear skirts, always wearing loose pants, even if there were many beautiful long skirts and short skirts in the closet. Although it is very cold in winter, Xiao Q is determined not to add a pair of cotton wool pants, preferring to freeze his lips purple. The reason is very simple, the male students in the class will coax and laugh at the girls who are not slender, sometimes not only the male classmates, but also some girls will join the ranks of laughing at others.
After adulthood, you will find that "self-confidence" is the best weapon and shield, when a person exudes a confident atmosphere from the inside out, and is not moved by the unfriendly evaluation of the outside world, it will form a unique personality charm and gradually dissolve unfriendly treatment.
These are the biggest takeaways I gained when I read Han Xie: Fearless Truth.
"Han Xie" is not like a book, more like a life message given to you by your neighbor's sister. The author Zhao Han (Caroline Han Hanjie) is a knowledge master with nearly 10 million fans on the whole network, the book includes the prejudice, bullying, gossip and help and love she encountered in her growth, involving family affection, love, learning, work, interpersonal communication and other aspects, you can find the answers to the problems that most girls will encounter when they grow up.
It's more like a growth manual for women.
Before I came into contact with Han Xie, I didn't know who Zhao Han was? What is her personality? What are her three views? If you have similar questions, through questions such as "How do you see yourself?" "How to describe myself in the past 10 years" Nine simple small questions and answers, the author has presented his own outline in front of the reader.
Loving beauty and thinking that I am beautiful, humorous, kind, and have a kind of open-mindedness unique to northerners, this is my first impression of Han Hanjie in the text. Later, I searched the Internet for a video of her book, and the above was verified, and unexpectedly, her voice was very soft.
We can also ask ourselves and answer ourselves on the nine questions in the book, stand in the perspective of strangers, re-understand ourselves, understand our current selves, summarize past experiences, and look forward to future lives.
"Xu, steam also." One is red, the other is warm. - "Sayings"
If the first chapter is about knowing yourself, then this chapter is about pampering yourself. People who love themselves will give people the impression that they are as hot as the sun and as warm as the sun.
No one is perfect, our strengths and weaknesses together make up a unique us, and some of the shortcomings we think of are not shortcomings, but only different from those around us. Like the little Q mentioned at the beginning of this article, isn't it thin enough to be fat? Is being fat a person's shortcoming? Ms. Zhao Han summed up in "Han Xie" that "any characteristic of growth can be a reflection of our own potential, and we must accept and understand the most authentic self." The only thing that accompanied us to the end was myself. ”
In 2008, an album called "19" came out, opening the legend of Adele dominating the major music charts, and the following year won the Grammy Award for Best Pop Singer and Best Newcomer Award, and won the title of British National Treasure Singer. Before experiencing marriage and thinning, Adele has always been shown to be plump and recognizable among many stars.
Her singing and live stage effects have a powerful aura, which is also the charm emanating from the confidence of the heart.
In addition to reconciling with ourselves, we must also be surrounded by many intimate people, lovers, family, friends... How to manage various intimate relationships is another difficult problem in growth.
In "Han Xie", the author combines his 8 years of "sister-brother love", experienced long-distance love to cultivate positive results, plus 6 years of rich experience in married life, and gives readers three pieces of advice:
1, build trust, less temptation, less testing. In fact, under empathy, no one likes the feeling of being doubted, if they are tempted and tested, how wronged and sad they will be, and they will not force others to do what they "do not want".
2) Earn money, maintain a family, and have emotional value, with at least one of these skills. The essence is the equality of both parties, if everything needs to rely on each other, psychologically it must be shortened, how can you develop a healthy intimate relationship?
3. Independent and complete from each other, jointly meet the needs of the higher level of Maslow's demand level. Only when we are comfortable and rich with ourselves will we hope to achieve emotional resonance with another person of the same frequency and obtain pleasure that cannot be achieved alone.
The author shares various life episodes encountered in studying abroad, and I believe that people who have had similar experiences will resonate.
Due to the error in English scores, he could not successfully enroll, and out of a correct understanding of himself, he bravely chose to review the results, and indeed obtained an evaluation that was in line with his own cognition.
Host family owners have some paranoid personalities, require police mediation when conflicts break out, and there is no reassuring place to live in a foreign country under the intense academic pressure.
Perhaps it is precisely because of facing various changes alone and solving them one by one that the quality of the author's independent self-confidence has been formed. As a reader, I also draw a little courage from it, no matter how difficult the situation, as long as you try to solve it, there will always be a day in the past, and one day in the future, these changes and dilemmas will become an impressive episode in the memory.
When I saw Han Hanjie's overseas experience and experience in Phoenix TV, I was reminded of an idol in my childhood, Hua Dan ZengZimo, the former boss of Phoenix Satellite TV. However, in contrast, it is not easy for Han Hanjie to achieve today's results, the failure of the college entrance examination, the car accident and the physical discomfort caused by family genetics... It can be said that compared with ordinary people, it is also very bumpy, but she can say that "what should be yours will eventually come to your life." "Such an open-minded attitude to face.
Cultivation contains too much content, it seems that this big sister next door is eager to teach everyone who reads the book "between one page" in her life. Soothe your heart, be grateful for everything and laugh at your attitude towards everything; the small details of interpersonal communication that make others comfortable, the persuasion to keep independent thinking without being humble and unobtrusive... After reading her previous life experiences, I think it is precisely because of the author's own character that is worth learning, so that she can find "a little sweetness" in suffering and twists and turns, and find the strength to let her grow, without becoming a "Xianglin sister-in-law" who complains about the world every day.
Psychological writer Huang Qituan recommended that "the value of reading lies not only in obtaining knowledge, but also in experience, and only experience can enrich our lives." In the process of reading, I also experienced one more life and one more life solution. ”
If your life has been going well, or if you are a man, it is not a way to read Zhao Han's (Caroline Han Hanjie)'s "Han Xie: Fearless Truth" book, all you should watch a text movie, have more life experience, and open up a little breadth of life.