Man Forty: Epiphany is the beginning of confusion

At night, the bar street is full of colors on the road and noisy in the ears. As a forty-year-old man, I don't know when I started falling in love with the hustle and bustle. Turn a corner and flash into a small shop with a not-so-bright-looking façade. As an old customer here, first of all, I like the difference between this and those bars outside, and I dare to make a pure land in such a bustling place, which is really bold, and secondly, I talk to the manager.

In the small shop, you can leave life and work alone, experience life alone, and face your true self. Taking off the mask to face the world truly, only experiencing the present without considering the future, this simple and simple state cannot be experienced elsewhere. Although I also know that tomorrow should come and do, but after a busy work, a person who comes here to replenish blood can be regarded as a small reward for himself.

When I entered the store, I sat in a familiar position, and when the store manager saw me, a bright smile immediately poured into my face, just like an old friend meeting. He turned around, took out my stock of wine in the shop and handed it to me, pushed a plate of snacks, bent down and took the ice ball from the freezer and put it in the cup, while handing it to me, he smiled and said, "You haven't been here for a long time." Recently on a business trip? I took the glass, pulled out the oak plug and put the wine into my wine glass and his glass, simply shook it, the two of them touched the glass and drank it all, and said: "It's been a long time since I came, I was busy bidding for a project recently, and I lost it, and I was busy in vain!" "As he spoke, he added some wine to his respective glasses." Victory or defeat is a common affair. Not for the first time. Right? The store manager said half-jokingly. He smiled symbolically and thought to himself that it was indeed the case, where there was an undefeated general in the mall. Taking a sip of the wine glass, experiencing the smoky taste of the wine in the glass, with cold passing through the throat, an inexplicable pleasure washed away the haze of the day, waving at the store manager, "You go and do your business, I will go home alone." "Okay!" Every time the store manager said this, he always took the customer's phone with the kind of depression and frustration, and then went to greet other guests.

A person drinks quietly, and his mind flashes like a movie to communicate with customers. Every conversation, every activity, every phone call, I tried to find out where I was losing in this project. When I look at my experience in this third person way, three big words suddenly flash in my mind: Self-righteousness. Suddenly I understood something, in fact, in the whole follow-up process of the project, I was fooled by what I thought was an illusion. The customer's seemingly brother-in-law exchanges, the promises behind them are actually just what I thought. As it happened, the store manager walked past me with a trademark bright smile, and a sense of unreality came to mind, can I be considered a real friend with the store manager? This sense of unreality made me very uneasy, and an uncontrollable idea of the world's bustling profit emerged uncontrollably. I finally understood why the project was lost, and it was normal to lose it, and it was strange that I got it. Take a sip of wine and suppress the thoughts in your heart. When you see the truth, you are happy, but when you see the truth, you are very painful.

A man who is forty and not confused may be able to face the feeling of seeing through the red dust and bear everything brought by the world alone. Suddenly, I felt that I was not alone, and I had the family I could trust the most. Thinking of this, I immediately put down my wine glass and called for a substitute driver to go home. In a man's life, the last thing that can go with you is the woman who is waiting for you to come back at home.