A 58-year-old woman who goes to work as a nanny and meets a well-equipped employer proposes to you, should she remarry happily and become a hostess by a nanny? Maybe this is the choice of most people, but some people have different ideas.
My cousin's approach surprised many people.
My cousin was a rural man, and it had been five years since his wife's death, and she had been living alone in her hometown. Last year I heard that she had come to town and found a wife with good conditions to remarry, but I had never seen her. Yesterday I went to the vegetable market, just met her, and carefully selected and bought vegetables in front of the vegetable stall. Then I went up and talked to her for half a day, and after listening to her story, I couldn't help but give her a thumbs up.
It turned out that her cousin did not have a pension in the countryside, and after her husband left, she did not want to go to other places with her children, so she was alone in her hometown. Last year, a good sister introduced her to a job as a nanny, and her employer was called Lao Zhang. Old Zhang 68, single for many years, retirement salary of 7, 8 thousand, there are two houses under his name, the economic conditions are quite good. The monthly salary for the nanny is 2800 yuan, which is hundreds more than other people's families.
But Lao Zhang is a more picky person, before retirement is a cadre, is used to being served, all aspects of the requirements are not casual can cope, eating requirements are light and nutritional collocation, hygiene should be clean and tidy, clothes should be washed separately, summer light-colored clothes should be washed by hand, what things are placed in what position, they have to follow his will. The point is that the nanny herself must also be dressed generously and decently, neither lari-la-la nor flowery.
There were four or five nannies hired in the front, all of whom were fired because Lao Zhang was not satisfied. Greasy cooking, untidy hair, and even unwashed socks are all reasons for him to fry people.
After the cousin went, her hands and feet were neat, her personality was cheerful, and she could speak the Tao, which won the favor of Lao Zhang. Lao Zhang became more and more satisfied, and gradually had further ideas.
The cousin did a very happy job, a year later, Lao Zhang proposed to his cousin, saying that he had discussed with his children, and they said that it was rare to have an aunt to satisfy Lao Zhang, and they definitely supported it. This can be done once and for all, saving them the trouble of worrying. This is simply an unexpected good thing, with Lao Zhang, the second half of his life will be relied on.
Lao Zhang thought that his cousin could not ask for his advice, but what he did not expect was that his cousin did not think about it and refused, she said three reasons:
First of all, as a nanny, I have working hours, rest days and holidays, and I can still get the respect of my employers, so I don't want to do it on any day, I live alone. Be your wife, still do the same work as before, even to do more, but there is no salary, no rest days, no freedom, become a free nanny, and I am a high climb, I must look at your face, pay more and harder, it is also a matter of course.
Second, your salary is quite a lot, but who can guarantee that the salary card will be in my hands, or that I am in charge, and the children will come to my trouble and settle the general ledger with me in the future.
If I want living expenses, it is my greed for money, if I don't, spend a point to ask you for a point, and it becomes that you are raising me.
No matter how many houses I have in my name, I will not transfer to me, and I will not use the rest of my life to fight for other people's property, fight to be blushing or even go to court, and I will give my children nothing to do. Although I don't have a building, I have housing in the countryside, maybe in a few years the countryside will be demolished, in the end I have a way out.
Third, I have served you comfortably, if one day I am sick, you basically do not do housework, you are accustomed to the days of being served, it is estimated that you can not take good care of me, when the time comes, your children will definitely let me go back to find my children. So what can this marriage bring me?
So, I'm still a babysitter, free and simple. I earn a salary with peace of mind, spend it with dignity, and live freely, so why bother with myself. In the future, if you don't want to go to a nursing home, you can either live with my children or go to a nursing home.
Listening to this, I really admired my cousin's insight, she lived not greedily, did not behave as a person and did not be humble, could see openly, and thought far. Women, no matter how old they are, must polish their eyes and live clearly.
Choose for yourself, bear it for yourself, and if you choose to remarry, you have to be prepared to face a lot of real people and things. And make long-term plans for the future.
Most of the remarried elderly, the other party's children are not willing to bear your side, when their old man passed away, your value is gone, you worked hard to accompany the old man for more than ten or twenty years, may be in the eyes of their families, you have never been a stepmother, but a nanny identity, did not think of being responsible for your future.
What's more, those once amiable stepchildren are afraid that you will worry about his family's property, turn their faces and be ruthless, and sweep you out of the house. On the Internet, I often see poor aunts asking for help everywhere, telling them about their years of grievances and efforts, but they can't get a place to live. Instead of being so messed up, it's better to be a free-spirited babysitter now.
This is a personal choice, different concepts of life, different needs, and different consequences that each can bear, but in any case, we must look at the long term, not only look at the surface and the present of things.
Of course, the remarried elderly are also very happy. It all depends on your own choice and creation. Think about it and decide, because there are no years to go back.
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