Photo/ Stills from the movie "Antarctic Love"
As the saying goes: "A hundred years of repair must be crossed by the same boat, and a thousand years of repair can sleep together." If there is any fate under the heavens, I think there is nothing more than marriage.
But there are always some people who don't seem to cherish marriage very much. I always feel that the right is together, and the inappropriate is separated. Therefore, in marriage, there will always be people who complain from time to time.
Men hate their wives and are old and yellow, and their faces are aging. Women dislike their husbands more and more incompetent, can not earn money, a lot of shortcomings. In the midst of the quarrel, the marriage seemed less and less necessary, until the day when both people could not stand it, divorce was as simple as a common thing.
We always say that we want to help more people, but if even the pillow people can't help, how can we help others? Why sweep the world without sweeping a house? In my opinion, a person's greatest merit is not to help anyone, but to survive the pillow person.
So, how can it be considered to be a pillow person? In fact, it is nothing more than three aspects.
Between husband and wife, they should know how to make progress with each other
Have you ever found a phenomenon that around us, people tend to complain endlessly about their partners? Whether it is appearance, or career, or personality, as long as there is dissatisfaction, it will infinitely enlarge the shortcomings of the other party, and then when they are not happy, they will send anger to the other party.
It seems that no one wants to communicate with the other party about what they are not satisfied with, and no one will really help their partner to change some bad problems. Since when did we become so impatient?
I remember a friend once told me that the reason why he divorced was because he felt that his wife was at home for too long, so long that he did not have the ability to go out to work, he looked at the female colleagues around him, had his own career, reasonable, he felt that his wife was difficult, and he looked down on his wife from the heart.
The more you look at it, the easier it is to quarrel with your wife. He thought that by virtue of his wife,he relied on his nature for everything and would never say divorce. But the wife still chose to divorce and chose to leave the family with the children.
Later, in just half a year, he found that his ex-wife was different from before. She has her own job, pays a good salary, and is perfectly capable of supporting her children. The taste of dressing is also much higher than between.
He never imagined that a woman could have such a change in just half a year. From this time, he began to understand that in fact, it was never his wife who had the problem, but him.
He thought he could make money, so he consciously surpassed his wife. Even if there is really something wrong with his wife, he has always been cynical, never moving to make his wife better and better, remind her, and help her find herself.
After his wife left him, he realized his problems, worked hard to grow, and eventually became his true self. He wondered if he had been able to stand in the perspective of a bystander when he hated his wife, help his wife find herself, and find her original self, whether the end of the two people would not be the same as it is now.
People always know how to cherish after losing, and never realize that they have changed each other at the beginning of the problem. Husbands and wives should be like a mirror of each other, able to reflect each other's beauty, but also to reflect each other's shortcomings, and then point out to each other, change each other, and make each other better.
When couples understand this truth, they also understand what it means to be a person.
Between husband and wife, they should know how to support each other
After we fall in love, we are always obsessed with men taking care of women, men love women, and even some women's parents will go out of their way to educate their sons-in-law over and over again, and we must love their daughters in the future, let her eat well, dress warmly, and live a good life.
In fact, in my opinion, this is not right. When a woman marries a man, she does not treat the man as a daughter, but as a wife. The wife means that she should also take on the responsibility of the wife, not to unilaterally enjoy the good of a person, only the parents will be unconditionally good to the child.
Between husband and wife, they should support each other and help each other, rather than one party shielding one party from the wind and rain and becoming the other's safe haven.
A very good female friend of mine is very obedient to her parents, and she feels that if she marries her husband, she should live like a little princess, be spoiled and loved by her husband, and she doesn't have to do anything. Her husband was really good to her and spoiled her, but then because of business problems, he was busy every day and gradually ignored her.
At this time, as a wife, instead of understanding her husband and taking out her savings to help her husband tide over difficulties, she added fuel to the fire and found various reasons to quarrel with her husband every day.
And her husband, even if he spoiled her and loved her again before this, could not control himself at the moment when she was unreasonable, and proposed a divorce in anger.
After the divorce, he concentrated on his career and soon made a comeback. My friend, on the other hand, because of his perennial dependence on others, is not diligent and does not distinguish between grains and grains, and does not even have the most basic ability to live.
Who is the source of this tragedy that ended in divorce? I think it's probably not going to be the man. If my friend can choose to face her husband at a critical moment, even if nothing can help, just verbal concern, to the extent that her husband loves her, he will not choose divorce.
Therefore, the husband and wife should not be dependent, but more importantly, they should be comrades-in-arms who can fight side by side. For the love of each other, for the sake of the two people's common children, work together to support this family.
Between husband and wife, it is more important to rely on each other for their lives
I often think about the question of who in our lives is the one who will accompany us to the end. I used to regard my parents and children as more important than my husband, but until I saw my friend lying in a hospital bed, and only my husband was busy serving her, I suddenly felt that in our lifetime, it was my husband who could rely on us.
Parents will eventually grow old one day, always go first than we have to go, and children, one day, will be full of wings and leave us. Until the end, the person who can accompany us is the lover who once said that he loved us and proposed to us, which is a lifelong partner.
Therefore, husband and wife are dependent on each other. When you are old, you can not abandon you and push you out to bask in the sun. Based on these three points, can we really understand that being a pillow person is a person's greatest merit?
Husband and wife are the least likely to consume each other. Only when we really pay attention to the people around us, really realize the importance of partners, and can do the above three points, can we really get happiness, and can we manage the marriage to be happy in this life.
May we all be able to live the pillow people, and really be able to grow old with white heads and spend our lives together.
END.