Maybe youth is the unspeakable pain in the heart, and when the memories come in, there is one percent sweetness, ninety-nine percent sadness!
Chen Xiaoxiao always remembered that when he first met Lin Wei, he was only 17 years old.
Lin Wei was in front of her when she picked up the book, he was very tall, wearing a light blue plaid shirt and white sneakers. The retreating Fu Hou accidentally stepped on Ding Chen Xiaoxiao's foot and hurriedly turned back to dao. Chen Xiaoxiao felt ridiculous when he saw his panicked look, and Lin Wei also laughed. His smile was clean, revealing white teeth, and his brow was stretched out, very sunny.
Chen Yaoxiao is very careful, she knows that Lin Wei will sleep in geography class, like to watch martial arts and science fiction, like to play fierce fighting games, and play football on the court every day after school. She didn't know how she knew this, just peeking at him in class, she probably wouldn't know so much, right?
On the day of the Dragon Boat Festival, Chen Xiaoxiao heard Lin Wei and others say that his parents were on a business trip, and he did not have zongzi to eat this Dragon Boat Festival, so she secretly took an extra egg yolk zongzi in the morning when her mother did not pay attention.
Absent-minded in the morning class, during the recess, taking advantage of Lin Wei's absence, Chen Xiaoxiao quietly put the rice dumplings into his desk, and when she saw Lin Wei come over, she quickly returned to her seat. Lin Wei looked at her strangely, and then smiled at her with a flushed face.
Chen Xiaoxiao didn't dare to look back at Lin Wei for a day. When it was over, he would surely know that she had put the rice dumplings in. What would he do to her? But there was a slight sweetness in my heart when I thought about it.
After graduating at the age of 19, Lin Wei was admitted to a university in Beijing, and Chen Xiaoxiao went to Shanghai. Lin Wei left first, and on the day he left, Chen Xiaoxiao went to send him. Lin Wei was still tall and tall, grinning, "Goodbye." He was still the boy who was as warm as the sun, but he didn't seem to linger, thinking of a bright future, and looking confident.
"Goodbye." Chen Xiaoxiao said softly, although she wanted to cry sadly, she still tried desperately to hold back her tears and didn't say anything
Chen Xiaoxiao, who has just arrived in Shanghai, is very introverted. She rarely goes out shopping with friends, always goes to the library alone to read books, sometimes her eyebrows stretch, sometimes she soaks all day. This has been going on for more than a year.
That day, Chen Xiaoxiao's book fell to the ground, and a boy helped her pick it up. The boy was sunny, his brow stretched when he laughed, and then she felt some pain in herself. That pain spread gently and very quickly in the body. Chen Xiaoxiao knew that she had thought of Lin Wei, and she had never forgotten him for a moment.
When Chen Xiaoxiao returned to his bedroom and passed by the public telephone booth, he suddenly had the urge to call Lin Wei.
She didn't have a phone card, there was no phone in the school dormitory at that time, and all the long distances had to be called downstairs to the communication room. The school had only four public telephone booths, which were always crowded with people.
She rushed to the outside of the school as quickly as possible to buy a telephone card, and there was no 50 yuan, so she had to buy a 100 yuan denomination. Spending so much money at once is too luxurious for Chen Xiaoxiao.
Many people outside the phone booth were waiting, and Chen Xiaoxiao could only stand at the end of the line. The wind at night was very cold, and Chen Xiaoxiao hugged his arms tightly and was excited and timid. What should I say to Lin Wei?
When the phone was connected, she heard the familiar voice, she suddenly panicked, so that she could not say a word, Lin Wei asked patiently at that end: "Hey, hey, please ask who are you looking for?" Chen Xiaoxiao finally spoke, "Lin Wei, it's me."
Chen Xiaoxiao began to write letters to Lin Wei. She always felt that she had a lot of things to say to Lin Wei at any time, but she couldn't call him at any time, so she wrote a letter and insisted like a diary.
Chen Xiaoxiao's letter is very long, the letterhead is light green, with pink flowers on it, very chic. This kind of letterhead was collected by herself after two hours of studying the bus alone and running to the small commodity market. I walked a long way when I changed trains in the middle of the car, and when I came back, I found that the soles of my feet had blistered. But she didn't feel pain, but was very happy. Lin Wei likes chic things, she has known it for a long time, so she is very attentive.
Every Saturday she got up early on time and rushed to the school mailbox to send the letter out. She carefully squeezed the letter that had been posted long ago, and was in a happy mood along the way. The morning wind blew up her long taupe dress slightly.
Lin Wei's letters were irregular, sometimes half a month, sometimes not a month. Chen Xiaoxiao was not sad, she thought that Lin Wei must be very busy, and she must be very nervous about studying. He was a boy, naturally he was not as sentimental as himself, and every time he received a letter from Lin Wei, Chen Xiaoxiao must not be able to sleep at night. She put the letter on her pillow and read it many times until she finally memorized it word for word.
During the summer vacation of her junior year, Chen Xiaoxiao made a crazy decision to visit Lin Wei in Beijing. Chen Xiaoxiao felt inexplicably excited when she thought of this decision, and she found that she missed Lin Wei so much, and this kind of thought had never been so strong.
She went alone to the train station to buy a ticket. There were a lot of people at the train station, and she didn't get a hard rate ticket, which meant that the journey of more than ten hours would be very hard. Chen Xiaoxiao thought that many books with them would be enough to pass this time.
The situation on the train was far worse than she had imagined, and she was crammed into the narrow aisles along with many people without seats. It was hot and there was a bad smell in the carriage. There were many people coming and going, and Chen Xiaoxiao's clean skirt was wrinkled and very dirty. But she quickly adjusted to the environment, and she leaned back against her suitcase to read a book. Lin Wei's letter was sandwiched in the book, and Lin Tui said: "If you come to Beijing, I can take you to the Summer Palace on a bicycle, and we will eat roast duck and watch interesting dramas."
Chen Xiaoxiao smiled as she looked at it, how nice, she was going to that city. When Chen Xiaoxiao stood at the door of Lin Wei's school with her suitcase in tow, she suddenly felt very confused. Remembering that lin wei and Lin Wei had not seen each other for more than two years, I don't know if he had changed Chen Xiaoxiao looking at himself, in less than three years, he had grown from an inconspicuous yellow haired girl to a beautiful girl.
Lin Wei was obviously surprised when he received her call, he went to pick her up, and in the distance he saw a girl in a long white dress, standing alone at the school gate with her suitcase, looking generous, but also tired. Chen Xiaoxiao saw him, but she did not wave to him. She just smiled and watched him run over breathlessly. Lin Wei took the box in her hand, smiled and said, "How did you get here?"
Chen Xiaoxiao didn't speak, just smiled at him. Lin Wei was thin, tall, and a little dark, and the only thing that hadn't changed was his smile, which was very clean, his eyebrows stretched out, and he looked very sunny.
Living happily in Beijing, Lin Wei took her to the Summer Palace on a bicycle and took her to eat the famous Peking duck to the Forbidden City and the Great Wall. It was the first time Chen Xiaoxiao stood on the Great Wall to see the rolling mountains, such a good scenery, and there was a boy he liked next to him, Chen Xiaoxiao felt that his heart was very soft. A gentle wind blew in her face, and her long hair was blown up and gently brushed on Lin Wei's arm.
Chen Xiaoxiao suddenly lowered his head to meditate, and Lin Wei smiled and asked, "What are you thinking?" Chen Xiaoxiao also laughed. She suddenly opened her arms, lifted her head and took a deep breath, and said, "How nice, Lin Wei, how good." Lin Wei looked at her with a smile, she looked like a bird.
After returning to Shanghai, Chen Xiaoxiao still insisted on writing letters to Lin Wei, still light green and broken flowers on the letterhead, still fragmented text. Lin Wei replied even less, sometimes replying, but the letter increasingly mentioned another girl. Chen Xiaoxiao watched quietly, feeling that her heart began to sharply ache, and this pain spread rapidly, causing her to bend down.
Chen Xiaoxiao sat in the library for a day, and the autumn sun was very good, projected through the fine fragments of sycamore leaves. Chen Xiaoxiao looked at the shadows of those leaves, after this autumn, she was going to graduate from college. She suddenly remembered that many years ago, when she was in class, she looked back at Lin Wei's past. Life is constantly changing, but why has her feelings for Lin Wei not changed in the slightest? Chen Xiaoxiao rubbed her head, she had always had a lot to say to Lin Wei, but at this time she found that she couldn't say a word. She let go of her pen and found that her palms were covered in cold sweat.
Lin Wei no longer had any letters. Chen Xiaoxiao also stopped writing. Although it is still customary to get up early every Saturday, it is no longer a day when long skirts flutter. Her senior year life was even more sad, except for two days a week to see her tutor, the rest of the time was to do her own graduation project. Chen Xiaoxiao rarely goes to the library again, and most of the afternoons go for a walk on campus alone. As she passed the court, she saw a lot of boys playing football, and she leaned outside the railing and watched for a long time. At this time the ball rolled to her feet, she lifted her feet and kicked it back, and the ball made a beautiful arc in the air and landed firmly on the court. Many of the boys shouted loudly, and some blew their whistles.
Chen Xiaoxiao laughed, this footwork is what Lin Wei is good at, she has seen it so many times, she has long been familiar with it. She strolled to the playground and saw that she didn't know who had drawn a big red heart near the runway: I LOVE YOU。 Chen Xiaoxiao stayed there for a long time, remembering a lot of past events, remembering the day Lin Wei went to Beijing, she desperately tried to hold back her tears, but he did not notice; Remembering the night when he first called Lin Wei, their call lasted only ten minutes, and she queued for more than an hour, but he did not hear the strangeness of her voice: on the train to Beijing alone, she was sullen and almost suffocated, but he did not ask a word; Remembering them standing on the Great Wall looking out, he didn't know what she was thinking.
Chen Xiaoxiao squatted down, buried his head in his arm, and cried uncontrollably. She had loved Lin Wei for so long, he should have known it long ago, but he hadn't loved her.
Chen Xiaoxiao finally wrote a letter to Lin Wei:
I've always wanted to write to you, but every time I pick up my pen, I don't know how to talk about it, so I put it down again. I could only allow myself to simply accumulate. Looking back now, the past was really like a dream, carrying all my love and dreams, but it finally couldn't get ashore, so it wandered again and again. I used to believe that you were in the palm of my hand, so the end of the world was at hand. But when I reached out, I found that there was almost nothing solid between us, and I just touched it lightly and it shattered.
I wrote you 99 letters, and if you carefully open the envelope you will see the number, but you never notice it. I said to myself, if by the 99th letter you haven't fallen in love with me yet, I'll give up. That day on the Great Wall, you asked me what I was thinking, and I never told you, I was thinking about time. I've loved you for seven years, but you haven't fallen in love with me.
Love is really like a door. When I first opened the door, I saw you passing by. But the second time you open the door, you
It's gone. But I will always remember that day you accompanied me in the wind blowing, my hair gently brushed on my arm.
After graduation, Chen Xiaoxiao stayed in Shanghai to work, doing his favorite planning in an advertising agency. After graduation, I went home once and had a party with my former classmates, but Lin Wei did not return. Chen Xiaoxiao thought, this is good, whether to say goodbye or not does not matter, what is important is that she knows that this one-way relationship has ended. As long as she had cherished it, it would be fine.
A boy named Lu Yuan laughed and talked about Chen Xiaoxiao's past, saying that she liked to collect cute cartoon pictures, like Weng Meiling's martial arts films, liked to eat chocolate-flavored cold drinks, and liked to go to the court to watch football after school... Chen Xiaoxiao was very surprised, but lu Yuan said that it was the appearance of a light cloud and a light wind.
After the party, Chen Xiaoxiao asked Lu Yuan, "How can you know so much?" Lu Yuan looked at her, his eyes flashing brightly, and then he said softly, "Because, I have loved you for so many years."