If you ask older leftover men why they are still single. Their answers were surprisingly consistent, because they had no money and were too poor to be rejected.
However, people around you often say: You look at who is next door, the conditions are not as good as you, the appearance is not as high as you, everyone can get married and have children, how can you not do it here. Poverty is always an excuse, and you should reflect on your own problems.
This is also true, poverty is only one of the reasons for being single, there are many reasons for being single, there are people who can't meet people you like, there are people who take the initiative to choose to be single, and there are people who are disliked.
Combine my own experience with the observations of single friends around me. I think there are roughly three kinds of people who are single: don't want to be in love, don't dare to fall in love, and won't fall in love
First, lonely patients, do not want to fall in love
In most single friends, it is found that many people do not want to be in love. They are used to being single and feel that it is good to live alone.
When you are not working, you love to sleep until a few o'clock, eat what you want, play games all night, and no one cares about your dirty clothes and dirty socks. A person lives a dashing and free life. Every time the idea of falling in love appears, I tell myself, no, no, I don't want to find someone to manage myself.
Single for a while, always single has been cool. There is nothing wrong with being single, that is, occasionally feeling a little lonely, most of the time can be arranged by yourself, more leisurely.
People who have been single for a long time have become accustomed to a single life, like to read books, play games, go shopping alone, and are used to cooking and eating alone. Instead, someone walks into his own life, the rhythm is disrupted, and it will be particularly uncomfortable. I think that shopping with girls is a waste of time, and with the energy to please girls, it is better to do more part-time jobs and make more money to make yourself better.
Single is also addictive, the longer the person is single, the more they do not want to get off the list, because one person is happy, two people are torture.
Second, passive single, do not dare to fall in love
Why are you single? Is it because I haven't met the right person, and I've never met a girl I like and love? There must be some, but I don't dare to confess, I don't dare to pursue, I can only watch silently.
Many people are single because they dare not fall in love. Afraid that in case the confession is rejected, how embarrassing. Or because I am not confident, I always feel that I am not good enough to deserve it. Or because of height and appearance and inferiority, I always feel that I am inferior to others.
A big reason why scumbags can pursue girls is that they are thick-skinned, even if they are rejected, they will always chase after them with a dead face, do not stop until they reach the goal, and finally hug the beauty. And in the single crowd, a large part of the people are afraid of this, worried about that. The pursuit of girls are twisted and pinched, it is naturally difficult to attract girls. Some may be rejected by girls once and feel that their self-esteem is greatly hurt. Since then, I have left a shadow in my heart and felt that I am not worthy of love.
You don't take the initiative to pursue, to perform, girls can't take the initiative to come to you, everyone doesn't take the initiative, and the result can only be to continue to be single. To get rid of the single, you must take the initiative to pursue, fail to say, do not act, think of hundreds of kinds of failure possibilities, they are scared of themselves, hard to accumulate courage, instantly gone.
Third, it is difficult to fall in love, and it will not fall in love
Falling in love is an ability that needs to be constantly practiced in practice. The reason why some people are single is that they will not fall in love, what they often say is that I am stupid, do not understand the speech, will not make girls happy, will not create romance, do not understand the girl's speech hints, emotional intelligence is particularly low and so on.
Some people, who have actively pursued, have also been accepted by girls, but after determining the relationship, they broke up not long after, as if they had been in love for no more than three months. Every relationship lasts a short time and then fails.
This kind of person really makes people love and hate. Obviously, the other party has already established a relationship with you, but it is still doing things my own way. The two go on a date to eat together, don't ask each other where they go, don't ask each other what they like to eat, or always ask each other. It feels like either too egotistical or unconstructed.
Shopping together, a friend's phone is going to be black, and he immediately throws his hands. Pick up your phone and hide in the corner. Leave a sentence, I am waiting for you here, you finish shopping to find me. Girls are sick, and they all drink more hot water. Do not know how to take care of others, will not take into account the feelings of others, emotional intelligence is not too high. Not being in love is also a big hard injury, and you can only be single.
Some single people, they are not without a love object, but lack of the ability to fall in love, can not chat, do not know how to speak, do not understand the hints of girls, do not understand the minds of girls. There is no sweetness and romance of all kinds. For girls, this kind of person is neither happy nor secure when they get along.
Emotional intelligence can be improved the day after tomorrow, if you don't want to fail every time you fall in love, then you still have to hurry up to improve your ability to fall in love. Otherwise, it can only be the fate of a single dog for ten thousand years.
At last:
Single people are not all because they are poor, when you don't have a house, you always feel that you can get off the single when you have a house, and when you try to buy a house, you find that you are still single. The main reason is the lack of motivation and ability to be in love.