Chapter 01
In a marriage, the relationship between the mother-in-law and the daughter-in-law is more difficult than the problem between the husband and wife. This contradiction often becomes one of the main causes of marital crises.
Many couples who were originally sweet end up feeling troubled because of the relationship between their mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, and there are differences and estrangements, which end in the end of their marriage.
Nowadays, more and more women are afraid to get married, and they are worried not only about getting along with their partner, but also about how they will get along with their partner's family. This is also a concern for ordinary people.
Ximei often said that marriage does not involve only two people, but between two families. It is inevitable that the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law needs to be handled well. After all, in a marriage, the influence and involvement of both families cannot be ignored.
Although a mother-in-law is different from a mother, it is difficult for her to treat you like a daughter. However, as a relative of her husband, her mother-in-law cannot give up.
If you don't handle the relationship between your mother-in-law and daughter-in-law properly, marriage failure is almost inevitable. Even if the marriage doesn't fail, the relationship between you will be hurt to some extent. Properly handling the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is essential to maintaining family harmony and a happy marriage.
It is important to learn how to deal with the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law and reduce conflicts. First of all, you need to understand why your mother-in-law is always targeting you.
The reason is actually because she can't get used to some of your bad habits, and thinks that you have taken away her son, or that you are not good enough for him. This point must be clarified in order to make things clearer and more formal.
Secondly, you should learn to "prescribe the right medicine" and adopt appropriate methods and techniques. This requires you to understand that conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law are very common, and wise women will take smart measures to deal with them. Let's take a look.
Chapter 02
01Learn to "reconcile" and be superficially submissive
Mother-in-law and daughter-in-law relationships often encounter conflicts, in part because your mother-in-law can't accept your "shortcomings" and may think that you don't fit her ideal daughter-in-law image.
Actually, this problem is not unsolvable. Some of the so-called "bad things" may just exist because they disagree with each other. That doesn't mean they're really bad.
When you have such a conflict, if you keep arguing, things will get worse. Conflicts should be resolved in a more relaxed and formal manner.
In this case, it is better to learn how to reconcile with her. True reconciliation is not about giving in completely, but about outwardly conforming to her and respecting her views, but still holding on to one's position on the inside.
When you have a different point of view from someone else, try to go along with them, but don't give up on your own ideas either. Doing so can reduce disputes and make the other person feel like you're not going to be antagonistic to them, thus maintaining a harmonious relationship.
02Reduce face-to-face engagements and avoid conflicts
The conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is often formed by the gradual accumulation of quarrels and conflicts again and again. Wise women should learn to reduce face-to-face encounters and avoid conflict.
When you have an objection to your mother-in-law, the best way is to have your husband come forward and make a proposal from his point of view, rather than directly confronting your mother-in-law. This method is more appropriate and can avoid the conflict caused by directly bumping into the other party.
Please understand that her son will forgive him no matter what he says, but if it were you, it would be different.
Instead of confronting your mother-in-law directly, you should defuse the conflict in a tactful way so that you can keep yourself free and relaxed. In fact, in marriage, the husband is the best mediator to promote the harmony of the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.
If the husband can play a proper role in reconciliation, the conflict between the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law will be greatly reduced. Of course, whether your husband is up to the task depends on his personal emotional intelligence and whether you can coach him.
Wise women know how to face conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law and avoid conflicts with mother-in-law. In this case, we need to pay attention to the mother-in-law's concern for her son and not rush into this issue.
When she notices that you are unkind to her son, or that you seem to have taken her son away from her, she will naturally become resentful of you and show resentment and disgust towards you.
Now, smart women know how to avoid conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, that is, learn to pretend. In front of your mother-in-law, you have to save face for your partner, for example, don't order him casually, don't scold him lightly. Doing so can make your mother-in-law feel that you are a polite and respectful woman.
At the same time, it is also necessary to pay attention to how you behave in front of your mother-in-law, and it is best not to show affection frequently.
Whether it is your coquettishness, inference, or intimacy between you, it should be considered as privacy between you, and only when you are together.
When getting along with our mother-in-law, we need to learn to hide and restrain our emotions.
The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is not just about contradictions and conflicts, and wise women should learn to recruit their mothers-in-law.
In order to achieve such a purpose, Ximei recommends that you build bridges in the family, strengthen the bond between you and your husband and children, and make your mouth sweeter. This makes for a more relaxed and formal life at home.
You don't have to cater to her all the time, you don't have to give everything for the whole family, and through the mouth of your husband and children, you can also express your thoughts to her.
Perhaps you can frequently praise your grandmother in front of your children, subtly convey your good intentions, and make your mother-in-law understand your intentions.
In fact, we are all a family, how many mothers-in-law really can't get used to their daughters-in-law? In any case, if you give your heart to your mother-in-law first, as long as she is a sensible person, her heart will gradually open up to you. After all, family harmony and mutual respect are paramount.
Chapter 03
What you need to know is that once the conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law cannot be reconciled, your marriage will come to an end. This is a very serious and important issue, please take it seriously.
When there is a situation of "water and fire incompatibility" between husband and wife and mother-in-law, it is most difficult for husband and wife to grasp. Naturally, this relationship is difficult to maintain.
In the TV series "Mother-in-law is Coming", He Lin and Wang Chuanzhi's relationship was very good at the beginning.
But later, the conflict between He Lin and her mother-in-law, as well as Wang Chuanzhi's brother and sister-in-law, became more and more serious, so they chose the path of divorce.
The reason for this is that her mother-in-law is too critical of her, thinking that she has many of the problems of city girls, and that she is not the same kind of person as they are from the countryside.
He Lin is too brave and impulsive, and often opposes her mother-in-law. Wang Chuanzhi, on the other hand, was unable to play the role of mediator, which exacerbated the conflict.
Papi-chan once said: The key to the harmony between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is that when you treat your mother-in-law as your own daughter, and you don't see her as your biological mother, she will treat you with the same enthusiasm and sincerity. We don't treat our mother-in-law as a mother because we can't apply to her the way we cherish and treat our biological mother. This sentence is not a simple truth, but a reminder that we should get along with our mother-in-law in a relaxed and formal way in order to follow the path of family harmony.
In short, family harmony requires the contribution of women. While respecting a woman, we need to learn the right methods and skills to communicate and get along with her. In this way, we can create a beautiful and harmonious family atmosphere.