Every day.
will be staged, countless encounters.
But not every encounter can make people who are destined to hold hands.
Why is that?
From the perspective of love psychology:
In the process of getting along with men and women, they actually silently follow the "Twenty-Eight Law".
How do you understand that?
For example, the reason why two people meet.
It's 20% luck and magnetic force that is at play.
If you want to fulfill your love with each other, then you must grasp 80% of the initiative.
The "unspoken rules" of sexual interaction: the 28th rule.
So how can we, after having 20% luck, operate effectively so as to grasp the feelings of two people?
01
Respect and understanding
In the interaction between men and women.
Respect and understanding are the foundation of a healthy relationship.
Maslow's hierarchy of needs states that:
Everyone has a need to be respected and understood.
This demand is particularly important in the context of relationships between men and women.
When one party is able to respect the other person's thoughts, feelings, and needs, and strives to understand the other person's position and point of view.
Then two people can establish a deep relationship of trust.
For example, Xiao Zhang and Xiao Li are a pair of lovers.
Xiao Zhang is introverted and likes a quiet environment, while Xiao Li is lively and cheerful and likes to socialize.
In the relationship, Xiao Li respects Xiao Zhang's choice and does not force him to participate in activities he doesn't like; At the same time, she also tries to understand Xiao Zhang's inner world and gives him enough support and love.
This interaction makes their relationship stronger and makes them cherish each other more.
02
Independence vs. Dependence
Do you know?
In getting along with each other, independence and dependence need to be balanced.
Independence means that both parties have their own lives and spaces to be able to handle problems and take responsibility on their own.
Dependence, on the other hand, means that we can support and rely on each other.
From the Law of Twenty-Eight:
Typically, independence accounts for 80% of the weight, while dependence accounts for 20%.
With such a trade-off, the couple's relationship will last longer.
Here's an example.
Xiao Wang and Xiao Zhao are a husband and wife.
Xiao Wang is a man with a successful career, and he is in charge of his work.
But in the family, he is very dependent on Xiao Zhao.
Xiao Zhao is a gentle and virtuous woman, her focus is on her family, but she also has her own pursuits in her career.
Two people are independent of each other and dependent on each other, facing the ups and downs of life together.
This balanced relationship makes their feelings more stable.
03
Communication & Expression
Want to have a long-lasting relationship?
Then the two of them must communicate effectively.
For example:
Xiao Liu and Xiao Chen are a pair of lovers.
In their interactions, they often encounter disagreements.
But two people are always able to communicate openly, express their opinions and try to understand each other.
Once, Xiao Liu needed to go on a business trip for a month because of work.
And Xiao Chen hopes that he can stay with him.
In the communication, Xiao Liu expressed his helplessness and apology, and promised to surprise Xiao Chen when he returned; Xiao Chen also expressed his understanding and support, and encouraged Xiao Liu to work with peace of mind.
This kind of effective communication makes them cherish each other's feelings even more.
In the relationship between men and women, communication and expression are often the key to solving problems.
When two parties encounter conflicts or disagreements, they can find solutions if they can communicate honestly, express their thoughts and feelings, and try to understand each other's positions and perspectives.
This ability to communicate is an important guarantee for a healthy relationship between men and women.
If you want to make love last.
So everyone, you need to understand the "Twenty-Eight Law", and at the same time love someone, make reasonable "trade-offs".
Emotionally original, warm words. From the perspective of psychology, I analyze the thousands of emotions and hope that my article can bring you a different feeling. Thank you for your continued attention, and having you by your side on the creative road is the biggest motivation.