Original · Plagiarism must be investigated
When people reach middle age, life is very difficult!
Do you think that stumbling through half a life, even if the days are not prosperous, you can also walk into marriage hand in hand with the former lover, and it is also a kind of bland happiness to know the cold and know the heat for the rest of your life!
However, the reality tells you:
Those who are good at imagination should be smacked!
What a painful realization?
With the passage of time, middle-aged couples will always accept the challenge of marital solidity and accept the test of personal endurance because of one or another problem!
When the backlog of problems reaches a certain level, the idea of "can't go on" will arise spontaneously!
Fortunately, some middle-aged couples can deal with these problems rationally and mend the relationship in time.
But some middle-aged couples allow the problem to develop viciously, and finally make the relationship tense and disharmonious, and even when the idea of "can't go on" arises, there is nothing else but complaining and accusing each other!
In order to make the people who promised the rest of their lives in the past really be able to interpret "hand in hand" relatively perfectly, this article will give middle-aged couples a wake-up call:
Adjust the mode of getting along as soon as possible, don't regret it when you don't come in time - late love is lighter than grass!
Middle-aged couples should adjust their relationship mode as soon as possible! Don't regret it if you can't go on:
1: Poor communication and lack of communication
Poor communication has almost become a normal marital problem for too many middle-aged couples!
However, there are very few people who are willing to face up to the problem of "miscommunication" and make effective improvements to it and help the relationship to be harmonious!
That's right, middle-aged couples, in addition to being too familiar with each other, also because they are busy with work, taking care of children and the elderly, and dealing with family chores, have long since not had much time and energy to pay attention to each other's inner feelings and needs!
However, that's not the main cause of communication barriers!
Lack of time and energy does not mean that "you can't speak well".
When husband and wife can reach the mode of talking well, they will understand each other properly and reasonably meet each other's inner needs in a state of empathy!
The so-called communication barrier between middle-aged couples is just that some people are unwilling to close their mouths and open their ears, so they have caused a situation where they are emotionally burst or the atmosphere is freezing before they finish three sentences!
So, the first piece of advice for middle-aged couples is:
If you don't want your marriage to come to an end, learn to listen to each other's voices, open your ears, feel each other's feelings with your heart, and learn to take the initiative to communicate and communicate.
When two people can keep an open mind, listen patiently to each other's opinions, and try to understand each other's position, the marriage can only pass the situation of stronger feelings, and there will be no "can't get by" situation.
Remember, effective and harmonious communication and exchange can enhance the relationship between couples and reduce the occurrence of misunderstandings and conflicts.
2: In marriage, someone takes on the role of the shopkeeper
In marriage, what kind of person is the shopkeeper?
The so-called hands-off shopkeeper means that in marriage, he avoids the responsibilities of the role, is unwilling to share the responsibilities for his partner, and is good at using a "should" attitude to push the big and small problems and responsibilities in the marriage to the person in front of him!
In marriage, the assumption of family responsibilities is a tacit matter for two people. However, these responsibilities are extremely sensitive and important issues!
Therefore, after the husband and wife have been together for a long time, one party has the psychology of the other party that "if I don't do it, the other party will do it", it will gradually unbalance the family responsibilities with some trivial problems in marriage, and they will not think so.
In this way, the shopkeeper was born!
This mentality of throwing off the shopkeeper has seriously led to the superposition of contradictions between husband and wife and the dissatisfaction of lovers.
In such a situation, if the party who bears too much responsibility does not know how to adhere to its own bottom line and principles, and pays excessively, the party who throws off the shopkeeper habitually evades responsibility......
Then, the party who bears too much responsibility will lose enthusiasm for the management of the marriage due to "over-fatigue".
After a long time, the phenomenon of centrifugation between husband and wife will occur, ranging from a makeshift marriage to an end of the relationship on the grounds of "emotional discord"!
In the face of such a phenomenon, especially between middle-aged couples, we must know how to give each other the right support and encouragement!
Especially for people who bear too many responsibilities, not only must correctly express their demands that need to be shared, but also adhere to their own principles and bottom line, and they must also be a bad person, but also stimulate the initiative of the other party!
If there is no desire to share between husband and wife, the existence of marriage has no practical value!
3: Lack of empathy, good at feeling the marriage experience from your own feelings
The word empathy, I believe many people are familiar with it, which means to feel each other's feelings with the same feeling as their own feelings!
Only those who can empathize have the ability to empathize, and two people who have the ability to empathize can jump out of their own feelings and look at the problems existing between each other and the problems of marriage management!
However, some couples are unwilling to empathize with each other positively, but use their own feelings to define each other and maliciously speculate about each other!
In the end, it led to a state where each other's mouths were full of gunpowder!
When two people in a marriage have started the state of arguing and raising the bar when they open their mouths, remember that:
The purpose of you looking for someone to marry is not to fill the smoke of gunpowder, but to help each other achieve the rest of your life together!
Therefore, in order for the marriage to continue well, we must remember:
Now learn to shut up and listen to the other person's heart, and then express yourself in a way that the other person can accept!
In addition, if two people are together, if they really don't want to have the slightest empathy, it's better to end it altogether, don't consume each other for the sake of self-interest in the marriage!
Many times, the fate of two people has come to an end, and the end gives each other a way to be reborn!
In a sense, the phenomenon of "can't get by" between husband and wife is never the result of a short period of time!
If you can't mend your marriage in time at this moment, you must be ready for divorce!
I just want to advise middle-aged couples:
It's easy to fall in love, it's hard to keep love, and there are problems in all marriages! It's just that middle-aged couples will have more marriages in comparison, as long as they have patience and think that they have the ability to bear marital problems, then the marriage will continue well!
So, do you know what to do in the face of marital problems?
Love is the purgatory of people in the world. Whether it's love or friendship, the right time and the right person can achieve positive results!
I'm a high-quality affective writer who has provided valuable and meaningful help to many counselors. I have rich experience in marriage, relationships, relationships, etc., if you have any emotional confusion, you can directly consult me.
Discussion: Are you a person who has the ability to bear the burden of marital problems? Welcome to leave a message to interact.