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The relationship between children and parents is destined to drift apart!
It seems that the more independent the children are, the more useless the parents will be.
However, this never means that parents are really "useless" to their children!
In a sense, the role of parents' advice and guidance on their children's lives determines the smoothness of their children's lives and the "usefulness" of parents to their children.
Otherwise, how can there be a saying that "an old man in a family is better than a treasure"?
The "usefulness" of parents is not only reflected in the feeding and clothing of their children, but also in the planning and guidance of their children's studies and careers!
In particular, as children continue to grow up, when emotional choices are presented as an important life choice, the "usefulness" of parents is even more important!
Ignorant parents, in the face of their children's finding a partner, will only rely on their own will to restrain their children and make them obedient; Or overdo spending on your children's ideas!
Visionary parents, on the other hand!
Forward-thinking parents will give their children 3 wise advice when dealing with their children:
1. I will advise my children to "know how to cherish and learn to be grateful"
In this moment of rampant desire, too many young people have lost the ability to pay attention to the most sincere feelings around them because of individual desires and the acquisition of temporary benefits, as well as immature cognition!
Ignorant parents have also repeatedly told their children that they must pay attention to reality and gain, and cannot drag down their lives for the sake of a "love"!
Forward-thinking parents will advise their children to:
You can't be overly in love, but you can't fully value reality! Be sure to use a positive attitude to face emotional choices!
Most importantly, visionary parents will tell their children:
As long as someone is willing to give sincerity and is willing to use real self-motivation to create happiness that belongs to each other, even if they really go all out for a lifetime or achieve nothing, then they must learn to be grateful and cherish!
Because, in the center of this reality, a person who knows the cold, knows the heat, loves you, and loves you is a person's most valuable wealth!
2. Children will be advised to "be independent and maintain themselves"
We all know that everyone has their own path in life to follow, and no one can truly and unconditionally become anyone's dependence!
Any relationship is an exchange of values, and in terms of the emotional relationship between men and women, the exchange of values is even more important!
Recognizing such a reality, you will understand:
Compared with looking forward to who can be relied on by oneself and fantasizing about who can be relied on by oneself, the existence value of an independent and self-powerful person can attract a person who is willing to cooperate and win-win!
Moreover, far-sighted parents will also tell their children that in addition to paying attention to their own independence, never stopping their own life management, and ensuring their own existence value in the relationship, they must also abandon the love brain!
A person, once in love, will completely lose himself!
No matter how valuable the existence of a person who has lost himself is, in the end he will only be used and consumed, and he will not have the qualifications to be sincerely accompanied!
3. It is recommended that children "pay attention to communication and understanding, and pay more attention to each other's growth"
Between men and women, it's easy to say love and it's hard to keep love! Poor communication in a relationship, no matter how much love you say, it's in vain!
So, visionary parents will tell their children:
1: No one will love you for no reason, you must have irreplaceable value;
2: Before you want to be satisfied with reasonable needs, you must learn to be a person who expresses yourself correctly;
3: When the other party wants to express themselves, they must learn to shut up, empathize with the other party's feelings, and give reasonable responses and appropriate suggestions;
4: Growing together can make the relationship more harmonious, not to be a stumbling block to each other's progress, and don't forget to improve and transform yourself!
5: Pay attention to each other's interior, pursue more spiritual resonance, and can't be attracted by all appearances!
In the final analysis, as a parent, you should be the guide of your children's life, not the decision-maker, let alone the person who drags your feet!
When dealing with their children, far-sighted parents will let their children have a correct view of marriage and love, and will pay more attention to their children's mental health problems!
At the same time, far-sighted parents will become "friends" with their children.
In this way, you can ensure that you are within a reasonable distance, pay attention to the real world of your child, encourage when you should give encouragement, give advice when you should give advice, and step on the brakes when you should step on the brakes in time!
If you are a parent, I hope you will be a visionary parent and let your children's life bloom in a truly ideal state!
Negative emotions are common to all, and when you are willing to put them aside, you can not be bound by them. Ultimately, it's up to you to do that!
About the Author:
High-quality emotional field authors, professional counselor holders! He has provided valuable and meaningful help to many counselors. I have rich experience in marriage, relationships, interpersonal relationships, etc., if you have any emotional confusion, please feel free to consult me.
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