Text | Mi Li's mother
With delicate curly hair, perfect makeup, a toned body, and a relaxed and natural state, this retro wife has set off a wave of popularity on social media platforms in Europe and the United States recently.
Their profession is housewives, the purpose is to "take the husband as the sky", and their daily work is to keep the house in order, and the children are clean and lovely.
Judging from the photos they post daily, it seems that the whole picture is covered with a retro filter.
There is a very popular account on social media, Ballerina Farm.
Its founder, Hannah, attended one of the best ballet schools in the United States and was a beauty queen in New York and Utah, but before graduating from college, she chose to marry and have children.
And, because her husband wanted to live on the farm, she also gave up the dance career she had insisted on since she was a child, and also gave up the bustling life in the big city, and returned to the countryside with her husband and became a full-time wife.
The family lives on a large farm in Utah, and they are self-sufficient on the farm's output.
Hannah is responsible for all household chores, taking care of the children, and taking care of the vegetables and fruits on the farm, while her husband is responsible for grazing and managing the large livestock.
The family was also dressed in a very retro style, with the boys wearing denim clothes like their dads, and the girls dressed in floral dresses, just like in the vintage pictorial.
It's not just that the picture is retro, but even the life mode is getting closer to the old days.
They preach that women should be brought back to the family, become stay-at-home wives like traditional women, and call themselves "tradwives".
They pay special attention to promoting the female identity of "good wives and good mothers" to the public, support the marriage relationship of "male dominance, female dominance", and claim that this is the real "femininity".
And this trend first prevailed after the end of World War II.
A large number of American families have flocked to the suburbs, and being a housewife in a suburban home is the home of most American women.
At that time, Life magazine, which had the right to speak in the United States, chose housewives as "women of the times" in its special issue of "American Woman" in 1956.
What were the characteristics of housewives at that time?
Mi Li's mother will list a few casually, and everyone will taste a product.
After graduating from high school, she got married, she was young and beautiful and would please her husband, and by the time she was in her 30s, she was already a mother of 4 or 5 children.
You can not only decorate your family to be warm and lovely, but also take care of household chores, drive your children to school, attend community charity meetings, and go shopping once a week.
Helping the husband to entertain guests at home, this number exceeds 1,500 per year, that is, an average of more than 4 guests per day.
You need to spend a lot of time with your children, care about their academic performance, and raise your children well......
When she was a girl, she got married, and from then on, she was limited to having children, taking care of her husband and children, and the whole family, and this is the life of a woman who is praised as a "woman of the times".
At that time, there were so many rules and regulations calling for women to return to the family, so that they could occupy all their time, so that they would have no time to take care of anything else, and give way to the jobs in society in favor of the unemployed men.
However, why did the "popular" trend that had to be forced more than half a century ago make a comeback?
From the point of view that tradwives preach, they feel that there is a so-called "natural" difference between men and women.
Estee, a well-known European and American wife, said: "We advocate that men go to work and women take care of the housework, and we hope that women will serve their husbands...... But that doesn't mean we're not as important as men, it's just that we have a different division of labor. ”
This video has more than one million views.
They also have special words to promote migrant workers, they say: "When a woman submits to her boss, no one will say anything; But why is it that when a woman submits to her husband, she is considered a slave? ”
I have to say that their rhetoric is indeed demagogic enough.
Today's women are indeed under more pressure than in the past, and when we become wives and mothers, it seems that we naturally bear the "motherhood punishment".
As Estee puts it, "Most families are couples working, but we've seen an entire generation of women burn out as they juggle work and household chores." As a result, many women want to return to their families. ”
We need to do more to compete with men in the workplace, to break the invisible ceiling, and at the same time, we need to take care of the family and children.
This kind of injustice does exist.
Especially in Europe, the United States and some East Asian countries, until today, women still need to bear their husband's surname after marriage, which will also make women weaken their own value, as if they have become someone's accessories.
Speaking of which, Mi Li's mother has to mention the great physicist and chemist "Marie Curie", her achievements in science are incomparably brilliant and worthy of being remembered in history, but what she left behind is the name of Mrs. XX, who remembers, her real name is Marie Skorodovska.
It is true that the environment is still disappointing, but should we compromise like this?
At first glance, these coquettish wives' remarks seem to make a lot of sense, but once you break through this seemingly "independent" and "self-loyal" cloak, you will find that their theories are just like ostriches burying their heads in the sand, deceiving themselves.
Evasion, although not shameful, is useless.
It is human nature to avoid difficulties, so those who rise up to resist are particularly precious.
Do you remember how the first female runner to participate in the marathon struggled?
In the 1960s, the era that tradwives wanted to return to, women were not allowed to run marathons.
However, there was a woman named Catherine Switzer who bravely took to the track.
At that time, she concealed her gender in order to compete, but in the process of running, she was still discovered as a woman.
The Administrator stepped forward several times to stop her from racing, but in the end, her spirit moved the other team members and spectators who rushed up to stop the Administrator and help her finish the race.
After her amazing run, women finally won the right to compete, and she achieved the opportunity to fight for equal rights for tens of millions of women.
It is precisely the existence of those women who are uncompromising, dare to fight, and strive to break the ceiling that these traditional wives can live their so-called "ideal" lives in peace.
By advocating for all women to return to their families, we will give up all our hard-won rights.
The overturning of Roe v. Wade is a huge step backwards.
From the timeline of human civilization, this event is equivalent to going back half a century in history.
You must know that the "right to abortion" established in the United States 50 years ago by the "Roe v. Wade" case is the result of the hard struggle of countless people.
The legalization of this right has promoted the recognition and protection of women's rights and interests around the world, and rescued thousands of women who have been unable to help themselves in difficult situations, which is considered a milestone event in the history of American justice.
And now, a fluttering verdict has made everyone's previous efforts collapse.
It's no wonder that some netizens said that Justice Ginsburg had to be angry.
There is also International Women's Day, which was originally established by women pioneers from all over the world to fight for the rights and interests of working women and advocate against the war, and they took to the streets to celebrate the glory of labor and women's identity.
However, for decades, the words "women" have been stigmatized, and even insulting women while packaging it as a festival to stimulate women's consumption, which is stupid and bad.
"Barbie", a relatively feminist film released last year, to be honest, the plot outside the play is even more exciting than in the play.
In the plot, women live in carefully wrapped sugar-coated shells as soon as they are born, establishing unrealistic life fantasies. The hidden patriarchy makes you instinctively think that men are more intelligent and that men respect women.
With all due respect, the women who are still promoting the concept of tradwife at this time, just like these Barbie dolls in Barbie Land who have not yet awakened, dress up and socialize beautifully every day, and feel that they don't need to use their brains to live a very comfortable life, cherish their hard-won little luck, and the road to happiness is to get married and have children.
However, in reality, at last year's Oscars, the two biggest contributors behind the film, director Tigreta Geweig, were not nominated for Best Director, and Margot Robbie was not nominated for Best Actress.
In other words, Barbie did not receive any nominations, but Ken himself received two nominations, which is full of irony.
In Mi Li's mother's view, the essence of tradwife is a filter for the "good old days", a delicate performance, not actual life.
The content in those accounts is just a new kind of "retro performance".
When you really listen to what is preached, and give up all the return to the family at all costs, you will realize that the truth is not as rosy as they appear.
There is still a long way to go in the pursuit of equal rights.
The road may be difficult and difficult, but please believe that even when the "darkest hour" comes, there are still people in this world who are fighting to the end.
Personal profile: @米粒妈频道 (welcome to follow), Mi Li's mother, American returnee, Haidian parent, the author of "Parent-Child English Books That Affect Children's Lives" ranked first on the Dangdang New Book List. Focus on learning dry goods, educational experience sharing, education and further education for children aged 5-12, English, mathematics, science enlightenment, and new and good things from all over the world, welcome to pay attention! (0~5 years old, please pay attention: @米粒妈爱分享)