Text: Marriage counselor Liu Jie
In love, we all have the possibility of meeting people who are tempted but can't be together.
Encountering such a situation, for a woman, often makes her fall into deep entanglement and pain.
If you want to be together, it's impossible; If you want to let go, it's not easy, and you will fall into a dilemma in an instant.
So, how do you let go of a man completely? In fact, the most ruthless way is to "disconnect".
"Disconnection", as the name suggests, is to sever all contact. Some people may say, is this too decisive?
But in fact, long-term pain is better than short-term pain, and only by truly severing ties with the past can we have a better future.
Just like Miss Zhang, she and Mr. Li used to be a couple in love, and they also had a sweet time.
But beauty is always short-lived, there are more and more contradictions between the two, and there is no way to be together well.
After thinking about it, Miss Zhang decided to let go and let go of this relationship completely.
She chose to "cut contact", deleted all of Mr. Li's contact information, and even moved out of the city where they once lived.
At first, Ms. Zhang was in great pain. But as time passed, she gradually came out of the shadow of broken love and started a new life.
01
Why is "disconnection" the best way to completely let go of a man?
First of all, from a psychological point of view, "disconnection" can help us break the psychological dependence on that person.
When we keep an eye on his dynamics and contact him from time to time, we are actually prolonging our own pain.
And "disconnection" is actually a way to force yourself out of this psychological dependence.
Secondly, "disconnection" allows us to pay more attention to ourselves.
When we shift our attention from men to ourselves. You will find that there are many meaningful or happy things to do.
For example, learn something you've always wanted to learn but didn't have time to learn, expand your social circle, or even start a new relationship.
In addition, "disconnection" can also help us rebuild our self-worth.
In a relationship, it's easy to lose ourselves and see the other person as more important than ourselves. "Disconnection" is a way to regain self-worth.
When we no longer regard that person as the center of our lives, we can pay more attention to our needs and feelings, love ourselves better, and live the life we want.
Of course, "disconnection" is not an easy task. We need to overcome the fear and reluctance in our hearts to truly do it and cut off the connection with that person.
However, only by bravely facing your heart and letting the past turn the page can you find the happiness that truly belongs to you.
02
So, how to operate "disconnection"?
First of all, we need to cut off contact with that person on a practical level.
For example, delete his contact information, avoid going to places where he often appears, don't inquire or follow his dynamics, etc.
Second, we need to build a "firewall" psychologically.
For example, whenever I think of him, tell myself, "This is in the past, I'm going to look forward." ”
Finally, we can seek outside support.
For example, talk to friends, spend more time with your family, and let them be there for you through this difficult time.
Although, "disconnection" is a ruthless practice, it can really help you let go of a man completely.
By severing our connection with that person, we can break our psychological dependence and rediscover ourselves.
Of course, "disconnection" is not the only way, everyone has their own way of dealing with feelings.
But no matter which way we choose, we must be brave enough to face our hearts in order to come out of the shadow of our feelings.
There is a saying that goes like this: "Life is like a play, because of fate, we get together." It is not easy to help each other grow old, whether it should be cherished more. ”
May we all cherish the people in front of us, and we can also be brave enough to let go and always live for ourselves.