I don't know if you have noticed that when a child reaches the age of 5 or 6, his small mouth can make people cry.
Yumi, who didn't say anything before, seems to have ushered in the first rebellious period of her life recently, and she can give me a few words when I say anything.
When I was practicing, I asked her to play it a few more times, and she said, "Why do I have to practice a few more times when I know how to play the piano?"
wanted to enroll her in a pinyin class for young children, but Xiong Wa was stunned and refused on the grounds of "no one has reported my good buddies, why should I go?"!
When writing homework, the posture of holding the pen was not very standard, and it was corrected several times. Xiong Wa asked: Mom, did I write it wrong? I said no.
Xiong Wa asked again: I didn't make a mistake, and the teacher praised me for my good homework, why do you always say that I am doing it? I feel very comfortable holding a pen like this, what are you always staring at it for?
I can really be choked to death by a bear child in a minute, and I don't know where to start if I want to refute it. If you talk too much, you will be disgusted: "Why is my mother so verbose, isn't it good for you to do your own thing?"
I have to say that today's children are really too assertive, they are not only not afraid of their parents, but they are not used to parents at all, as long as they feel that they have a reason, they can immediately scold you have nothing to say.
complained to my friend, and my friend said with an expression that he had already seen it: Today's children are the same, but what other children say also makes sense, and we have to reflect on ourselves.
My friend also persuaded me from a strange angle: "If you think about it from a different angle, it shows that your baby has her own ideas and dares to challenge authority, which is a good thing!"
If you think about it, you will find that behind the children's retorts, there is actually a desire for independent thinking and self-expression.
A child's backlash is not necessarily rebellious
Did you know that most children talk back, and they may not be rebellious for no reason.
In fact, in the process of growing up, the child's self-consciousness begins to awaken. When children find their own views and disagree with their parents' opinions, talking back becomes a way to express themselves and fight for their rights.
This is a very normal expression, a stage that children will inevitably go through in their development, and it is also a sign that they are beginning to think independently and express their opinions.
In addition to the inevitability of the growth stage, children's backlash may also be related to factors such as the family environment and the parent's education style. For example, a parent's overly aggressive or authoritarian approach to parenting may make the child feel oppressed, leading to rebellious and back-talking.
Therefore, as parents, we need to have an in-depth understanding of the truth and deep reasons for our children's backlash in order to better cope with and guide.
It should be reminded that when children talk back, do not use "parental authority" to suppress children, it is recommended that parents should remain calm and rational, first listen to what their children are saying with a peaceful mind, and think carefully about the thoughts and needs behind their children's angry words.
Parents are children's armor against the world, so we must make children feel respected and trusted at all times, so that they know that they are valued.
Especially when he talks back to his parents, the respect of his parents will make the child feel that he is understood, and when the child feels understood and respected, the backlash behavior will naturally decrease.
Children of the 3 periods love to talk back
Child developmental psychology has found that there are 3 rebellious periods in the process of growing up:
First rebellious period: around 3-5 years old. At this time, children often use "I don't want" to express their preliminary judgment, and in this way to declare their initial sense of independence;
The second rebellious period: usually occurs at the age of 8-10, when children begin to seek more autonomy, are often dissatisfied with the rules set by school or parents, and are eager to break the routine and show themselves;
The third rebellious period: between the ages of 13 and 18, adolescents in this period, at the junction of youth and maturity, longing to fly freely, and resenting any form of bondage.
During these three periods, arguments and rebuttals often become the norm for children, and they become like little hedgehogs, covered with thorns.
They want to compete with their parents through "refutation", so as to find their own personality and self-identity.
In fact, as long as the parents hold on to it, the child will become firm and behave in the future.
So if your child is in these stages and likes to talk back, try saying the following words.
When the child talks back, the parent says 4 more words
First sentence: I understand your feelings, can you share with me why you think the way you do?
When children talk back, their hearts are often filled with dissatisfaction and resistance.
At this time, a parent's "I understand your feelings" can make the child feel understood and cared for. At the same time, by asking children what they think and why, you can guide them to better express their opinions and feelings, thereby reducing resistance.
This also helps us to have a deeper understanding of the child's inner world, which provides a foundation for subsequent education and guidance.
Sentence 2: We can discuss this problem together and see if there is a better solution.
When a child has a different opinion on an issue, parents should not rush to dismiss their point of view.
Instead, we should encourage children to speak their minds and reasons and discuss the issue with them.
Through equal communication and discussion, it can help children establish correct values and outlook on life, and at the same time, it can also promote the harmony and harmony of the family atmosphere.
In the process of discussion, children can also learn to empathize and understand other people's perspectives, and cultivate their empathy and tolerance.
Sentence 3: I believe that you have the ability to solve this problem, can you tell me your thoughts.
Children often talk back because they feel they have been neglected or treated unfairly.
At this time, a parent's phrase "I believe you have the ability to solve this problem" can give the child courage and confidence.
This sentence allows children to feel the trust and support of their parents for them, so that they can face problems and challenges more positively.
At the same time, we can also appropriately give children some autonomy and decision-making power, so that they can exercise their ability and sense of responsibility in the process of dealing with problems.
Sentence 4: Let's work together so that neither of us is angry, can you give me some advice?
The family is a community, and every member should contribute to the harmony and development of the family. When a child talks back, we can see the issue as a challenge that the family faces together.
By guiding children to participate in the construction of the family, they will feel their responsibility and obligation, so as to develop their sense of responsibility and teamwork.
At the same time, children can also be encouraged to come up with their own suggestions and ideas, so that they can feel important and worth in the family.
This way of working together can also deepen the bond between family members and make the family more welcoming and beautiful.
Finally, I want to say that it is not a terrible thing for children to talk back, as long as we use the right mentality and methods to deal with it, it will turn this shortcoming into the motivation and wealth of children's growth.
If your child is in a period of love to talk back, you might as well try to say more about the above 4 sentences, maybe there will be unexpected gains~