Text: Marriage counselor Liu Jie
When it comes to love, we all want to have an eternal emotion, and this is still true after marriage.
However, the reality is often not satisfactory, especially in the face of an emotional crisis such as "husband's change of heart", many women can't help but ask: "What did I do wrong?"
In fact, many times, the husband's change of heart often starts with the woman's negligence.
A woman's negligence in marriage does not actually refer to a specific thing, but an attitude, a kind of slackness and indulgence in married life.
When a woman loses herself in marriage, is overly dependent on a man, or lacks sensitivity to a man's changes, it can easily lead to a man's change of heart.
01
Women can't afford to lose themselves
After many women get married, they give up their careers and hobbies for the sake of their families and children.
Circling around the pot all day long, around the husband and children, and gradually lost himself.
Such a woman, although she has paid a lot, worked hard, and has her husband in everything, she is often not cherished by men.
Just because, what a man needs is not only a capable housewife, but also a partner who can grow and progress with him.
For us, marriage is not only about food and clothing, but also about emotional comfort.
Therefore, in marriage, women must maintain their independence and have self-worth.
Don't let yourself become an "appendage" to a man, or become a "babysitter" for this family.
02
Women have to learn to manage their marriages
Marriage is not the end of love, but the sublimation of love.
It's just that after getting married, many women relax the maintenance and management of love, and even have the idea of "eating the old book".
They will think that they are already husband and wife, or even old husbands and wives, and there is no need to be as romantic and sweet as when they are in love, and they don't need to pay so much attention to men.
But in fact, this is a misconception, and marriage also requires emotional investment.
At any time, marriage needs to be managed, not only material investment, but also emotional communication and communication.
Women should always maintain a sense of reverence for marriage, feel the needs of men with their hearts, and maintain their feelings with each other.
03
Women need to be sensitive to changes in men
When a man changes his mind, it is often not an overnight thing, but there is a gradual process.
If a woman can detect the changes in the man in time and take effective measures to intervene and save them, then it is likely to be able to avoid the change of heart of the man.
Many women are careless in marriage, obviously men have a lot of abnormal behavior, and even the people around them think that this man is wrong, but women still don't take it seriously.
When the man really changed his mind, he regretted it, saying that he had seen it at the beginning, why didn't he bother with it?
Therefore, a woman must maintain a vigilant heart in marriage.
Don't be fooled by men's sweet words, and always pay attention to men's behavior and emotional changes.
04
However, even if a woman has done the above, it is not completely immune to a man's change of heart.
Because, love is complicated, and the human heart is even more unpredictable.
However, at least we can reduce the probability of a man's change of heart, or after a man's change of heart, he has enough ability and courage to face and solve the problem.
So, what should a woman do in the face of a man's change of heart?
First of all, think calmly and find out the root cause of the problem.
Is it because they have neglected something? Is it because men have been tempted by the outside world? Or are there already irreconcilable contradictions between them?
Only by finding the root cause of the problem can we solve the problem in a targeted manner.
Second, women must learn to forgive and tolerate.
If a man's change of heart is due to impulse or misunderstanding, and a woman is willing to give a man a chance to mend his ways, then forgiveness and tolerance are particularly important.
Of course, this does not mean that women should tolerate and condone men's changes of heart unprincipledly, but they should make wise choices according to specific situations.
In this ever-changing world, nothing is set in stone.
The same is true of marriage, which requires us to constantly work hard, manage, and maintain.
Therefore, when a woman should always maintain her awe of marriage and feel and manage her love with her heart, then no matter how the outside world changes, she can firmly grasp her own happiness.