Don't believe it, there really is. Under the conditions of traditional culture, this is not only a requirement of etiquette and customs, but also a provision of the law, and if you don't get it right, you will be sentenced.
(1) Sexual intercourse is the intercourse of men and women, which is purely a personal activity, with strong privacy and concealment, and large randomness. Husband and wife are one, often together, as a matter of course, it is natural. Even if there is a violation, it is difficult to verify it in actual operation, and it is impossible to check it.
So the law legislates from the result of intercourse. The "Tang Law Shu Yi - Household Marriage Law" stipulates: "If the parents are mourned and the child is born, he will migrate for one year. "Migration" is pronounced xǐ, the ancient criminal law of exile, which is roughly equivalent to the current fixed-term imprisonment or heavier.
(2) The law prohibits sexual intercourse, not the birth of children, because it is unfilial piety for men and women to have sex and is prohibited by law. Having a child is the result of sexual intercourse. As soon as the child is born, it is a fact of violation, and you don't need to investigate and collect evidence, and you can't deny it, just wait for the punishment.
The "Tang Law Shuyi" explains the legal provision of "losing a child in residence" in this way, that is, "a person who loses a child in his parents." They are all those who conceive within 27 months. If the child is conceived before the death of the parents. Though he bears a child in the service. Do not sit. It is born after the longitudinal removal service. But the fetal month is the one who is pregnant in the suit. Offended by the law. His concubines are also allowed to be limited to twenty-seven months. ”
In other words, regardless of whether the child is born during the mourning period or outside the mourning period, as long as the pregnancy is carried out within 27 months of the mourning period, it is considered a child of bereavement. Even if a child is born within 27 months of the mourning period, it is not illegal as long as the pregnancy is not carried out during the mourning period.
Obviously, the law sanctioned sexual intercourse, not having children.
(3) In the mourning of the parents, the mourning system is three years, that is, three years of mourning. However, the statutory period is not three full years (36 months), but 27 months (25 months for the main mourning period and 27 months for the non-mourning period).
According to the setting of the "Rites and Rites" and the "Book of Rites", the "Great Auspicious" ceremony is held from the first month of the third year to the twenty-fifth month of the third year, and the main mourning period of the mourning period ends. From one month to the twenty-seventh month, the "Tsuyo Sacrifice", that is, the ceremony of removing mourning clothes, is held. The mourning is completely over. The Tang Dynasty legalized the requirements for etiquette, and the enforcement during the period was very strict. The widowed child is counted as the pregnancy in October. If you encounter premature and late birth, you will consider yourself unlucky.
(4) Look at the provisions of the Qing Tong Li. "King James Daqing Tongli" has: "Anyone who has been mourned for three years will shave his hair for 100 days." Dismissal of the officer. The scholar dropped out of the exam. Do not drink alcohol at funeral, do not eat meat, do not be in the house, enter the public door small, and do not have good luck. ”
The so-called "mourning for three years" means mourning parents and keeping the system for three years. The so-called "100-day shaving" means shaving after 100 days, and it is not allowed to shave within 100 days, including shaving. The so-called "dismissal of officials", that is, those who are officials have to resign and go home to guard the system for three years, also known as Ding Wei. The so-called "scholar dropout examination" means that scholars cannot participate in the imperial examination. The so-called "not entering the public gate" means not going to the public hall to do business. The so-called "not to be auspicious" means not to participate in joyful things. The "non-inside" here means that you should not sleep in the bed in the inner bed, but should sleep in the place specified by the bereavement system.
Wives and concubines are all sleeping in the inner bed, and you are not allowed to go to the inner bed, which is forbidden to have sex.
(5) The formulator of the rules did not give an explanation as to why the mourners could not have intercourse. Understanding, it is nothing more than two aspects: mental and physical.
From the cultural and spiritual level, the mourning should be pure, pious, and free from distractions. In mourning, in mourning, in mourning, you can't think about other things, you can't do other things. You are distracted, you are distracted, you can't hold back, you want to be wrong, and your behavior is out of line, that is, you are unfilial.
From the physical and psychological level, during the period of mourning, the person concerned is physically weak, and sexual intercourse is not conducive to his physical health, but also to the next generation.
(6) Only those who have experienced it know. When my parents died, things were complicated and trivial, time was tight, tasks were heavy, and I didn't understand many things, so I couldn't eat well, couldn't sleep, was anxious, and was physically and mentally exhausted. At this time, the mental strength and energy are limited, so the prohibition of sexual intercourse makes sense. It's better to take it easy. If you're not convinced, just try it.