(The article is original, only published in the headlines, please indicate the source for reprinting.) ）
Recently, in the author's hometown, the dispute over the eldest son and eldest grandson actually caused a conflict between the two brothers.
The reason for this is that an old man died, and the eldest son of the eldest son was only 6 years old, and the son of the second son was an adult, so the two brothers were in trouble over who should preside over and participate in certain ceremonies for the sake of their grandchildren.
The eldest means that his son is the eldest son and the eldest grandson, and it is supposed that his son should be mainly involved in certain rituals, such as breaking pots and beating flags.
The second son believed that his son was an adult, and that he was the eldest son and eldest grandson, and that he should represent the family.
Fortunately, an elderly person in the clan was wise and patiently explained to the two brothers, and the crisis was resolved.
The old man thought that the eldest son was the eldest son and eldest grandson, and the concept of the eldest son and eldest grandson was the first male of the son of the long house. And the second son is the elder, called "eldest grandson".
Whether it is the eldest son or the eldest grandson, only in the big families of the feudal society will be exquisite. For example, in the past, emperors would generally appoint the eldest son as the crown prince to inherit the throne, and the eldest son and grandson also enjoyed higher status and respect.
And in the people, in the face of major events, who can carry things can obtain higher status and respect.
Between the two brothers, the eldest was originally not very responsible, and the old man was alive, and he was basically taken care of more by the second family, but he didn't want to lose face, so he had to compete with his brothers for the concept of the eldest grandson, so that his son could enjoy the family status and show his face at the funeral and regain face.
After the old man's patient persuasion, the two brothers calmed down. The old man said:
Don't think that the eldest grandson of the long house is so good, only six years old, arrange for you to keep the spirit all the way, do you do it? Can you do it? When you participate in the ceremony, can you keep up with your physical strength and intelligence?
So the main thing is to let the adult "eldest grandson" carry it. During the wake, the eldest grandson of the long house will guard for a while, and if he can't stand it, he will go to rest, and the eldest grandson will continue to keep watch.
During the funeral ceremony, when it comes to communication and understanding, let the eldest grandson face it, and the eldest grandson of the eldest house stands next to him.
After this arrangement, the two brothers were also convinced. As a result, the eldest grandson and the eldest grandson kept a vigil all night, mainly by the eldest grandson to face various ceremonies, the eldest grandson stood beside the eldest grandson almost the whole time, and when the funeral was held, the eldest grandson gave the eldest grandson of the eldest house and let him play the flag, or it was seen that the two brothers had no guilt, were more harmonious, and were not affected by their fathers.
After the funeral, I had the privilege of having a drink with the old man, and the old man also told us the younger generation more profound truths.
He said that face is not to be earned, but to be earned. Whether it is the eldest son or the eldest grandson, or the eldest grandson, it is a title, who cares about these things in front of outsiders? Who can carry things, who can handle human affairs, who can handle interpersonal relationships, and who has strength, people will recognize whom, whether you are the eldest son or the eldest grandson.
He also said: If you really encounter a situation like these two brothers, you must learn to empathize, handle things from the starting point of harmony and unity, do not fight for face, emphasize the concept of eldest son and eldest grandson, and you should shoulder your own responsibilities and obligations.
In a word, the eldest son must be like the firstborn, and the eldest son and grandson must also be like the firstborn, and the eldest grandson must also be like the firstborn. Everyone is the same, brothers will be united, they will all be sensible people, and there will be no such thing as the eldest grandson and the eldest grandson fighting for face.
The author thinks so. Some descendants have inexhaustible responsibilities and obligations, but they know how to fight for their rights and status, and such things abound in today's society! The dispute between the eldest son and the eldest grandson and the eldest grandson has also been staged in many families, and if it is not handled well, it is the beginning of the family conflict.
I don't know what friends think about this kind of problem? Welcome to leave a message in the comment area. #传统##长子长孙##长孙与别的孙子有什么区别?##弘扬中华传统文化#