brushed up on a male parenting blogger who angrily fought for stay-at-home mothers: "Every stay-at-home mother is a hero in her own life, and no one is qualified to point fingers."
If you want to say that others are not qualified to point fingers at stay-at-home mothers, I agree. But if you say that they are all heroes, I want to laugh inexplicably, and I feel that he has too much desire to survive, because he is making maternal and child products.
Stay-at-home mothers are quite sensitive, as long as someone makes a suggestion: you must not be a stay-at-home mother after giving birth. Someone will jump out and say:
Who will take care of the children if they don't be a stay-at-home mother?
Being a stay-at-home mom is a great profession that is harder than going to work;
What is there to be proud of when a working dog earns thousands of dollars a month?
I feel that stay-at-home mothers especially need the approval of others, and even if someone makes an objective suggestion, they will immediately put up a sharp thorn.
I happened to talk to my colleagues about some things in the workplace, and I suddenly felt that many choices in life, including women who choose to stay at home full-time with children or continue to work after getting married and having children, these seemingly accidental choices at that time are actually based on the embodiment of everyone's innermost values.
Let's start with one thing I chose.
Seven years ago, I had an opportunity to go to the countryside to help, which could add points to the promotion of my future title and possibly increase the bargaining chips for promotion. Actually, it's just a day a week. But I thought about it, and I weighed it again and again, that is, I was reluctant to give up my child who had just turned one year old, I would rather be promoted to the title later, and I would also go home at noon every day to see my child. So, I gave up.
More than 6 years have passed, and to be honest, I regret my decision at that time, if I had gone at that time, I would have been promoted a year earlier with one more points.
If it were now, I would definitely go, wouldn't it be that I couldn't see my child for a day? Isn't it just that the child's grandmother will complain about me? Why can't I overcome this difficulty?
And the reason why I made that choice at that time was because my understanding at the time was: women, it is enough to earn a little money to subsidize the family, and taking care of the family is the first thing, and there is no need to work too hard.
As a woman, I have this attitude towards work.
In a similar way, some female colleagues can not see their children for a few days, or even a few months, in order to make achievements at work, while some female colleagues are more "negative" than me and would rather resign and go home to take care of their children.
Women who find fulfillment in their work have different values than I do, they prefer to be in control of their lives, and they like to work hard.
Stay-at-home mothers who easily choose to quit their jobs and go home to take care of their children, and are reluctant to come out to work when their children grow up, prefer to take care of their families, while some have no plans for the future.
Which of these choices is more valuable? It's really hard to judge.
Is there any value in fishing? Many people would rather spend a lot of time, make a lot of money, and go fishing long distances just for their own enjoyment.
Is there any value in raising flowers? Spending money, effort, and effort, but watching plants grow vigorously is a pleasure for the body and mind.
Value cannot be measured in terms of money alone.
It's the same with being a full-time mother, as long as you feel that it's very comfortable, it's more comfortable for you than going out to work, you'd rather take care of your children than participate in the competition at work, and make money and don't have a sense of value to accompany your children to grow up, then feel at ease full-time, your value is at least recognized by yourself, and it doesn't matter if others say you have value or not.
One more thing, don't regret it when you're older.
It's like when we were young, we thought that love was a big part of life, we could not hesitate to fight with our parents for love, we could choose to marry far away and leave our parents and homeland.
However, looking back after middle age, how much love is there between husband and wife? Is love more important or is it important to make money? It seems that personality and the ability to be financially independent are more important, and those so-called feelings are fragile and vulnerable without the economic foundation.
In the past, I thought that spending time with my children was the most important thing, but when I looked back in middle age?
It's important to spend time with your children, but it's also important to have your own business. No matter how dependent I am on my children, they will have to be independent when they grow up, and it is a matter of minutes for them to want to "abandon" us.
Moreover, children are not as fragile as we think, they don't need us to be with them 24 hours a day, and they don't need to be taken care of too carefully when they are sick. Many times, as mothers, we just project our desire for control onto our children.
The whole environment has always instilled in girls the concept that marrying a good husband and managing the family well is your greatest success.
Actually, I didn't know until I was 40 years old that women can also do a good job, women can also earn a lot of money to support their families, and the value of women is not limited to shining at home. It's just that it's too late.
If stay-at-home mothers over the age of 45 can say frankly: they don't regret that they haven't gone out to work. I really admire her, it shows that she has a partner who is worth being with for life, a happy family, she is a person who really loves home, and it is great to be able to find the best thing for her to do in this life.
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Wanqiu talks about parenting, the mother of the two babies who loves to learn and think, welcome to pay attention, complain about the chickens and dogs that raise babies together, share the happiness of raising babies, and summarize the lessons of raising babies.
(The picture comes from the Internet, if it is invaded, it will be deleted)