6 daughters and 4 Harvard, what is the secret of the family education of the king of the ship? 

Text | Mi Li's mother

On the third day of the Lunar New Year, the news of the sudden death of Zhao Anji, the "Chinese female boat king", blew up Mi Li's mother's circle of friends.

You must know that Zhao Anji is a veritable light of the Chinese, this legendary woman is just 50 years old, and she is in the prime of life, which is a pity.

In the early morning of February 12, Zhao Anji died in a car accident, and an accident made her life freeze in an ordinary night.

Zhao Anji is the youngest daughter of Zhao Xicheng, the "Chinese ship king" in the United States, and she succeeded her father in charge of Fumao Group as chairman and CEO, and is Zhao Xicheng's most important child.

I thought that there would be a successor, and I could finally breathe a sigh of relief, but I didn't expect the white-haired person to send the black-haired person.

Zhao Xicheng was definitely a well-known figure in China's shipbuilding industry back then.

Under the circumstance that China's shipbuilding industry has just gone abroad and overseas orders are seriously insufficient, Fumao Group has ordered Chinese ships on a large scale for many times, which has played a key role in the internationalization of Chinese ships.

Zhao Xicheng also relied on his influence to take the lead in introducing overseas customers to China's shipbuilding industry many times.

He said:

"As a Chinese, I deserve to help. ”

It can be said that without Zhao Xicheng, there would be no development of China's shipbuilding industry overseas today, and the world's confidence in China's shipbuilding industry.

The Ship King and his children

In the United States, the ship king Zhao Xicheng's family is well-known for its education. Because there are 6 daughters in this family, all of whom graduated from the Ivies, and 4 of them went to Harvard Business School, making Harvard history.

If one or more children are outstanding in their grades, it may be by chance or luck. But if every child is so good, then it must be necessary to look at the parent's education method.

Of course, genes are a factor that cannot be ignored, but after all, it is six children, and high-quality genes cannot be so evenly distributed to each child, but excellent, but it is an average visible to the naked eye.

Former US President George H.W. Bush once sighed:

"The Zhao family is an extraordinary family. ”

His wife, Barbara, also said enviously:

"You should learn from the Zhao family how to discipline children. ”

And the reason why Zhao Xicheng passed on the property to his youngest daughter Zhao Anji to manage it was not because the other children were not excellent, but because each of them shined in their respective fields and couldn't get away.

The eldest daughter, Elaine Chao, is the first Chinese to enter the cabinet in American history, and is known as the "veteran of the four dynasties of the White House".

▲The second from the right is Elaine Chao

She entered politics as a White House scholar and held key positions during four terms as President of the United States.

He has served as the U.S. Secretary of Labor and Secretary of Transportation, and is a Chinese who has rewritten Chinese history and American history.

The second daughter, Xiaoqin Zhao, holds a master's degree from the College of William & Mary (one of the top liberal arts colleges in the United States), a school that has produced three U.S. presidents and currently works as a director of a large U.S. company.

The third daughter, Zhao Xiaomei, graduated from Harvard and served as the director of the New York State Department of Consumer Protection, the first Chinese-American director in the state.

The fourth daughter, Zhao Xiaofu, holds a J.D. from Columbia University and serves as a senior vice president of General Electric.

The fifth daughter, Zhao Xiaoting, completed her MBA (Master of Business Administration) at Harvard and worked as a professor at a well-known university in the United States.

It can be said that the daughters of the Zhao family are leaders in all walks of life in the United States. They are dignitaries, academics, executives...... And this not only means that the Zhao family can cultivate scholars, but he can also cultivate elite talents with outstanding ability.

The youngest daughter, Zhao Anji, is also as good as her sisters.

Like her three older sisters, she was admitted to Harvard and completed her studies in just three years. During his studies, he wrote "A Case Study of Shipping Finance" which was incorporated into a textbook at Harvard and is still a compulsory subject in the first year of Harvard Business School.

Just look at the title of this paper, and you can know that this time the major is finally right. After 23-year-old Zhao Anji got his MBA from Harvard, he joined his father's Fumao Group, ready to start from the grassroots level and take over his father's industry.

In fact, the six sisters do not have a strong will to take over the ancestral business, after all, everyone wants to realize their self-worth, and they also have a strong ability to work hard in their favorite fields.

As the youngest daughter, Zhao Anji feels that her sisters will not take over, and she has the responsibility to take over the country laid by her parents, because the hard work of the previous generation needs to be inherited.

This is more than 20 years. In 2018, Zhao Anji officially succeeded his father and became the leader of Fumao Group.

Although her ability is obvious to all, the industry still has a lot of complaints about her being a big boss.

Traditionally, the shipping industry is dominated by men. Mi Li's mother has indeed heard an unwritten rule of the crew who go to sea: women cannot get on the ship.

This old saying is even found in China and the West. Some people say that women going to sea will bring bad luck, but in fact, I think it is because there are many men on the ship, and women are a scarce sexual resource, and it is easy to cause disputes and even casualties when you get on board.

But over time, women are not suitable for the shipping industry, and it has become a stereotype for people.

But Zhao Anji didn't care, she said:

"It's true that most of the winners in the industry are men, which is why I have to work very hard to get into it and pave the way for future generations. ”

The goddaughter is well-groomed

Mi Li's mother went to visit a friend of mine who studied abroad before during the Chinese New Year, she just gave birth to a child not long ago, basically the child is still in the stage of babbling, I saw her reading feminist books to the child, I really sighed in my heart.

Here's what she showed her children:

▲ 4 cardboard books of female artists, activists, pioneer leaders, etc

After seeing her, Mi Li's mother is even more sure that the formation of values is really the sooner the better. Don't think that the child is still young, it's too late to look at these things when they are older.

When other children are still reading fairy tales, her children have begun to establish women's independent thoughts, so in the future, whether they are in the shipbuilding industry like the daughter of the Zhao family, or enter the political, judicial, and educational circles...... The heart is full of confidence and a sense of worthiness.

And when Zhao Xicheng shared his education experience, he said:

"The dowry we give to our daughters is not money, but education. ”

For example, every daughter requires self-management, such as setting an alarm clock before going to bed, getting up on time, going to school on time, and other trivial tasks, all of which are set rules, look at the results, and never overstep their responsibilities.

And since childhood, Zhao Xicheng and his wife have asked the children to take on the responsibility of entertaining guests, and every time a guest comes, the children must come out to greet them. But they never attend the table, but stay behind the guests and serve food and wine for everyone.

This is difficult for even many ordinary families to do. Think about it when we were young, and now when we become parents, are our children able to open their mouths to call others, and we are very content?

Children who are a little socially afraid and rebellious, maybe their relatives and friends don't even call anyone, and they are stuffy in the house, even if they come out to say a word, at most they will be polite and flash people.

The daughters of the Zhao family have been asked to entertain guests like waiters since they were young, which has exercised their ability to behave in the world, and each child is very friendly, and the communication is measured and decent.

Although the Zhao family is a tycoon in the shipping industry, the children are the same as ordinary children, catching school buses, doing housework, cleaning up yards, and even the 100-meter-long asphalt road in front of their homes is paved by six sisters.

Zhao Anji once recalled in an interview that when he was a child, he never felt that he was living in a wealthy family, and his parents asked them to rely on their own affairs, so they even earned their own tuition.

Zhao Xicheng and his wife are really working hard to let their daughters have the ability to live in the world, they are all excellent in their studies, and at the same time easy-going and humble.

Because they have never taken shortcuts to get what they want through the resources at home, they have always understood that if they want, they have to work hard to reach for it.

Firm confidence

Zhao Anji took over not only his father's Fumao Group, but also his father's patriotic feelings, and his belief in linking China and the United States and developing industry.

At that time, Zhao Xicheng's Fumao Group was the first Western company to order a large number of ships from China, and it was his great help that gave China's shipbuilding industry the opportunity to open up the international market, and since then more and more shipping companies have begun to order Chinese ships.

▲ Young Zhao Xicheng

After taking over Fumao Group, Zhao Anji also became more closely involved in business with China, traveling back and forth between China and the United States almost every two months.

She serves as co-chair of the Advisory Board of the Asian American Foundation and serves on the board of directors of the Shanghai Mulan Education Foundation.

Named after her mother, Zhu Mulan, the foundation aims to reward outstanding students and scientific and technological talents engaged in the shipping industry in China, and select outstanding personnel to study abroad.

Her family also donated the Mulan Building to Harvard:

She said that everything she has benefited from her parents' teachings, and she hopes that she can become a bridge between China and the United States, as her parents expect.

At the age of 50, she died in an accident, and her originally wonderful and brilliant life was forever frozen in that car accident. The Si people have gone, and Zhao Xicheng, who is already old, still has to move forward with a heavy load.

I have to say that tomorrow and accidents, I really don't know which comes first, the essence of life is impermanence.

In fact, looking at Zhao Anji's life, you will find that the positive values of Zhao Anji and her sisters come from a kind of confidence from the original family.

This kind of confidence is unreserved trust and support.

When he was in the fourth grade, Zhao Anji suddenly became obsessed with the French horn. For this "three-minute enthusiasm", mother Zhu Mulan did not suppress it, but said solemnly, as long as you like it, we all support it, but it is not allowed to give up halfway, "at least for a year".

Zhao Anji agreed, but soon regretted it. At the age of 10, she picked up a French horn about her height every day and ran between school and home before she found herself in big trouble.

In fact, the mother knew from the beginning that she would not learn for a long time, but she still chose to support her daughter's ideas, until her daughter realized from the bottom of her heart whether she was suitable or not, and the choice was always in her daughter's own hands.

Mi Li's mother also had the feeling of being fully supported.

Do you remember the game when I went from being "little transparent" in school to being a "man of the hour"?

Back then, I accidentally saw the registration notice for the district-wide primary school competition on the school bulletin board. With the mentality of "focusing on participation", I signed up for more than a dozen competitions in one go (I was really idle at that time...... Live competitions such as shuttlecock kicking, rope skipping, computers, etc., were all scheduled on the weekend, and Grandma Mi took me to the bus to compete.

I remember that some projects were voted on by the whole society, such as our paintings, which were exhibited in Times Square, and my grandparents made several bus trips to support me and voted for me.

As for the results of the competition, like a lottery, I thought that the lottery must be "thank you for participating", but it turned out to be a prize. But in retrospect, the feeling of being fully supported by my family was my biggest prize.

This kind of "participation" that is not too troublesome and not afraid to spend time can establish a close connection with the child. Let the child face setbacks or challenges in the future, there is a corner in his heart that can increase his courage and strength.

Speaking of which, Grandma Mi Li also has this great wisdom.

When Mi Li's father was still fifteen or sixteen years old, he really wanted to go abroad. But the whole big family, except for Grandma Mi Li, everyone else raised their hands and feet against it.

At that time, we went abroad as a junior international student at the age of fifteen or sixteen, and we really didn't hear of it.

One is that there are few ways to go abroad, and the other is that the family is really not at ease.

In the opposition of the family, Grandma Mi Li was particularly determined:

"My son, I know best, his ability to survive, his ability to take care of himself, his ability to interact with others, and his ability to solve problems, I think there is no problem anywhere. ”

Later, Mi Li's father whispered to me:

He was also surprised that Grandma Mi Li supported him so firmly to go abroad, but with this firm trust, he felt that he could do anything. ”

In fact, the daughters of the Zhao family do not have three heads and six arms. It is the parents of the Zhao family who know how to maximize the potential of their children, and use unlimited support and exercise to make them believe that they are omnipotent.

Zhao Anji's mother, Zhu Mulan, would say to her daughters whenever they encountered setbacks:

"We must fight with others, but also with ourselves, fight for equality, fight for independence, do not give up, and do not give in. What a man can do, a woman must be able to do, and she must do it better. ”

Human potential is unlimited, and the greatest confidence for children to strive forward is the words and deeds of their parents.

Personal Profile: @米粒妈爱分享 Mi Li's mother, American returnee, Haidian parent. Focus on learning, educational experience and further education.