I was born in the rural areas of Northeast China, and my ancestors were farmers for three generations. It is the three generations of farmers that people say. I have an older sister who is 6 years older than me, and in 2006, after two years of college entrance examination (I applied for Peking University in 2005, 3 points short of missing the major I applied for at Peking University), after one year of Xi, I was finally admitted to the more ideal college in my mind ~ Nankai University.
I also became the only student who was admitted to such a good school in the past half century since the resumption of the college entrance examination in our ten miles and eight villages.
In recent years, there has been a hot word on the Internet called "phoenix man", I don't know where this term came from? But the villagers all say that phoenixes do fly out of our poor yellow earth.
The day I got my acceptance letter, the sun was particularly hot. Dad put down the hoe in his hand, rubbed the mud and sweat on his hand on the yellowed shirt, and carefully opened the notice and read it over and over again.
Then he ignored the thunder outside, staggered to the ancestral grave of his family two miles away, knelt beside the grave of his grandparents, and kowtowed three times.
"Dad, mother, our old Zhang family has finally come out, and we will no longer be looked down upon because of my father's composition. You can close your eyes under the Nine Springs."
I only knew at that time that by the time I was admitted to university, my parents had been in the fingers of my parents and villagers for most of their lives. Why do you live in the fingers of your fathers and fellow villagers? It is said that the composition of the grandfather was not good, and this problem became a heart disease in the hearts of the parents
Yes, I am their only hope and the only hope that our family will have a good life. Thankfully, I lived up to their expectations.
The four years of college have passed in a flash, and I dare not forget for a moment the eager eyes of my parents, parents and sisters when they sent me on the green train to the north.
I was carrying a simple bag, and the close-fitting vest of my jacket was sewn with 6,000 yuan that my mother borrowed from the east and west.
I felt the thick stack of bills with my body as they rubbed back and forth regularly on my chest, as my ribcage rose and fell.
I know that my family has saved to the extent that they only eat 2 meals a day and only eat meat once during the Chinese New Year.
The campus of the university is so full of novelty, full of romance, full of youth, full of hormonal smell, the young men and women on the campus, I and I are in love, watching movies, or celebrating Valentine's Day, these things that seem to me to be happening right in front of my eyes, but they are very far away from me.
I dare not slack off on my Xi at all times, and I am well aware of the responsibility on my shoulders.
I wander on the edge of my classmates every day, and I am like a transparent person in the class, and only when I get the 8000~10,000 yuan national scholarship in my hand every year, I feel a lot more at ease.
In this way, I was escorted to the graduate school of this school without accident before graduation with the stable results of the top three grades in the professional course every year, and when I graduated from the graduate school, I also stood out in the competition of more than 2,000 people and successfully received an offer from the State Grid.
Prior to this, I only heard from the discussion of my classmates that Guodian's treatment was very good, and it was also one of the best in the formal state-owned enterprises. Seeing that my classmates were flocking to me, I also joined in the excitement and submitted my resume. I didn't expect that I had no intention of inserting willows, but I really got the admission ticket to Guodian.
I happily told my parents on the phone that I had found a job at the National Grid. A good state-owned enterprise. The treatment is very good, better than you can imagine.
My dad interrupted my mom and said, "Hey, my kid must have chosen the right one." It must be sitting in the office, and it can't be an electrician who climbs the pole and sends electricity to the east and west.
When I saw the envious eyes of my classmates around me, I didn't know that there would be bigger waves waiting for me next.
The days after work seemed to be uneventful, until one day I was called into the leader's office.
The old leader received me warmly, and I sat cramped on the sofa in his office, rubbing my hands back and forth. I had 10,000 possibilities in my mind, why did he ask me to talk? This old leader is very authoritative in the unit, and several of our new colleagues are afraid of him.
Everyone is walking on thin ice when they work on weekdays. People say that office politics is a tiger that eats people and doesn't spit out bones. In order to adapt to the office work culture, I also quickly read a lot of books, such as "Thick Black Studies", "Unspoken Rules", and "Square and Circle".
The book says that people who are confused about careers look at technology in the short term, relationships in the medium term, and mountains in the long term. In my opinion, having a skill is the most down-to-earth.
Seeing that I was restless, in order to ease the atmosphere, the old leader happily brought me a cup of tea, told me some things like a father's loving kindness, and asked me if I was still suitable for the working environment? What else did the organization need to care about at work? He told me a lot and let me relax my vigilance. Towards the end of our conversation, he didn't forget to tell me to go to his house for dinner on the weekend. He also said that it was not easy to go out, so I made their home my own.
I came to his house on the weekend as agreed, and during the dinner, the old leader introduced his daughter to me.
It turned out that his daughter was also in our unit, just in a different department.
The daughter of the old leader is very beautiful, with big eyes, as if she can speak, and she is only three years older than me.
When I was at the dinner table, I also felt the old leader's wife casting a look at me. As I went back and forth, I was invited to dinner more and more. Xiaoshuang and I also became talkative. As everyone expected, I fell in love with Xiao Shuang, the daughter of the leader, and a year later, Xiao Shuang also became my wife.
The colleagues around me knew that I had married the leader's daughter, and overnight, some of them were close to me and some were estranged from me. I thought I was the child who was favored by God, but the problem between me and Xiaoshuang broke out three months after marriage.
The trigger for the incident was to return to his hometown for the New Year. I heard that I planned to return to my hometown in Northeast China for the Chinese New Year, but Xiao Shuang was reluctant. He dislikes the dirty and messy countryside, the public security environment is not good, there are no big shopping malls or cinemas around, and there are few entertainment facilities, and he also said that the northeast is so cold, and the road is not easy to walk, and she and her relatives at home do not know each other, and they can't say a few words. After a good reassurance of me, he finally reluctantly stepped on the train home with me.
When I returned home, my relatives and friends heard that I had brought my daughter-in-law back, and everyone came to visit my house. At the beginning, Xiao Shuang could still say a few perfunctory words in front of and behind people, but before everyone left, she turned around and began to play with her mobile phone, ignoring the people around her.
When our family was eating at the dinner table, she also asked to use chopsticks, and Mom and Dad felt very embarrassed at the time. Our family of seven or eight eats at the same table, so why do we still use a pair of chopsticks? Who does your daughter-in-law dislike? My mother complained to me behind my back.
After eating, Xiao Shuang never helped to wash the dishes and dishes, because in her house, these things were done by the nanny, and she didn't know how to do these jobs.
I know the reason for this, so every time I finish eating, I take the initiative to help my mother go into the kitchen to wash dishes, wash vegetables and dishes, and after a few days of brushing, my mother is unwilling. She threw the dishcloth aside, deliberately raised her voice and said to Xiao Shuang, who was watching a short video in the house: The housework at home is all done by the daughter-in-law, why do our men make money outside and do housework when they go home? Are you marrying a daughter-in-law or an ancestor at home?
Xiao Shuang also heard that there was something in my mother's words, so she stayed at my house for a few days, regardless of my retention, she booked a ticket in advance and went back to the city with her suitcase.
Xiao Shuang just left, I was restless, always feeling that something was going to happen. Sure enough, not long after Xiao Shuang arrived home, I received a call from my father-in-law.
He didn't say anything on the phone, just said that the unit had an urgent task and needed to let me go back to the unit immediately. So my vacation was not over, so I hurried back to the city.
Since I came back from my hometown, my relationship with Xiao Shuang has also plummeted, she is always sour when she speaks, and the phone has also set a password, changed the screensaver, and removed our wedding photo.
I thought she was still angry, so I didn't pay much attention to it. Thinking about it after a while, she slowly figured it out by herself, and at this time I also received a task from the unit, to go abroad on a business trip for 6 months.
I understand the good intentions of my father-in-law, and everyone says that this business trip is a business trip on the surface, but it is actually a further study. It is not easy for anyone to get a place on this business trip.
No matter what everyone says, I'm still me, and in my mind's mind, technology is better than everything.
Although on a business trip, the conditions of food and accommodation are not comparable to those at home. Sometimes, in order to catch up with the task, I often work overtime until late at night.
When I'm very busy, I miss Xiao Shuang very much, but every time I take the time to call Xiao Shuang or send a video, the number of times she answers is getting less and less, and sometimes she finally gets through the phone, she also says a few perfunctory words, finds an excuse and hangs up.
The work on my side is finally almost done, and I plan to surprise Xiao Shuang and not tell him the date of my return. And just like that, I came back early, a week earlier than scheduled.
I didn't dare to delay for a moment to rush home, waiting to see Xiao Shuang's surprised expression, but what was waiting for me was a big blow
I hurried home, and the moment I opened the door, I looked at the men's coats scattered on the floor, and the sound coming from the room inside was particularly harsh.
I stood in the doorway, like five thunderbolts. It's there like a pestle.
And what I couldn't accept the most was that the man who escaped from the room in embarrassment turned out to be from our unit, and Xiao Shuang was in the same department
Once their department was engaged in activities, eating late, I saw him when I went to pick up Xiaoshuang, the reason why he impressed me very much, because he is indeed very energetic, 1.8 meters taller, a lot taller than me, and people look very shrewd. Shrewd beyond his age.
Xiao Shuang cried and begged me for the first time to ask me to forgive her.
She cried pear blossoms with rain, since I met her, she has never been soft with me, every time she gets angry, I coax her, this time it becomes her coaxing me, but this time I know that I and her will never be together again.
When we got married, the down payment for the wedding house was taken by Xiaoshuang's parents, and I paid the monthly payment after marriage, but when I divorced, I left the house to her, and only brought out a few clothes that I wore with me.
In this way, my marriage lasted less than two years before and after, and the brakes came to a sharp end. My hopes for the future were stillborn.