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I broke up after a fight with my boyfriend. At that time, I was sad and needed to be alone. I happened to think that there was an empty room in my mother-in-law's house, so I decided to stay with her for a few days.
The mother-in-law is my boyfriend's grandmother, and although I have only met her a few times, I know that she lives alone, her son works in the field, and she usually cooks meals alone. This is the first time I have eaten at my mother-in-law-to-be's house, and I am still a little restrained.
When I arrived at my mother-in-law-to-be's house, I knocked politely on the door and said, "Mother-in-law-to-be, I'm Xiaofang, can I come in?" ”
The mother-in-law opened the door with a smile and said enthusiastically: "Xiaofang is here, come in and sit." It's time for dinner, just one piece. ”
I was a little embarrassed and said, "Mother-in-law-to-be, I'm really sorry to disturb you so suddenly. I had a fight with your grandson and want to come here for a few days and calm down. May I? ”
"Yes, you can stay with me, and my girlfriend will talk to me." The mother-in-law said with a smile.
When it was time to eat, the mother-in-law brought out a table of meals - there were 16 dishes! My eyes widened in surprise. How did the mother-in-law-to-be cook so many dishes alone?
"Mother-in-law-to-be, why do you cook so many dishes?" I asked in surprise.
"Haha, these dishes are what I usually do, you try this spicy fish, my specialty dish!" The mother-in-law said with a smile.
Eating a hearty dinner, questions welled up in my heart. Usually the mother-in-law eats alone, why do you cook so many dishes?
"Mother-in-law-to-be, you eat alone, why do you cook so many dishes?" I couldn't contain my curiosity and asked.
The mother-in-law sighed and said, "Amitabha, get used to it, now it's just me, it's okay to do more, just save it for tomorrow." However, a table of steaming dishes also feels quite lively. ”
Listening to the mother-in-law-to-be's answer, my heart soured. It turned out that she had lived alone for too long, and she was used to cooking a little more, and she could feel a little warmth. I decided to stay and take good care of my mother-in-law-to-be, she is old and should not always live alone.
At dinner the next day, the mother-in-law made more than a dozen dishes. I advised her: "Mother-in-law-to-be, you are too tired of cooking so many dishes, right?" Just make a few dishes. ”
The mother-in-law said: "I'm not tired or tired, this is my usual habit, simply eating is not used to." You try this shiitake meat slice, it is guaranteed to be delicious! ”
I smiled helplessly and didn't say anything more. It seems that the mother-in-law is used to cooking so many dishes every day, and I can't persuade her for a while.
After this hearty dinner, I began to feel a little overwhelmed. Usually I cook my own meals very simply, basically one or two dishes, preparing so many dishes is too time-consuming and energy-consuming.
The next morning, I plucked up the courage to say to my mother-in-law-to-be: "Mother-in-law-to-be, I see that you spend so much time preparing so many dishes every day, isn't it too hard?" How about we simplify the recipe and make just a few dishes? ”
The mother-in-law smiled and said, "Xiaofang, I understand your kindness, but this has been my habit for many years. I am really not used to eating a few dishes, and I can't eat. Let's keep my habits, I'm used to it, it's not hard at all. ”
I could hear the mother-in-law-to-be's tone very firm, knowing that she would not easily change her lifestyle. Only then did I realize that I had a big difference in living habits from my mother-in-law-to-be. I am used to simple and fast, but the mother-in-law is used to this traditional way of life, and it is difficult for me to ask her to change.
Thinking about it this way, I am a little scared - am I really fit to marry the grandson of my mother-in-law and live this kind of life?
After dinner that day, I plucked up the courage and talked sincerely with my mother-in-law about this issue.
"Mother-in-law-to-be, talk to you, I find that our living habits are a little different. I'm more used to simplicity, but you're used to taking the time to prepare. I'm afraid that if I get married, I won't be very comfortable with your lifestyle, and there will be a misunderstanding between us. I said carefully.
The mother-in-law nodded and said appreciatively: "Xiaofang, you are right, our habits do have differences. I appreciate that you are so honest in telling me about this issue. An unsuitable marriage can be painful, and you think it through. ”
I breathed a sigh of relief and said, "Then if I marry and you change your habits, I will feel very uncomfortable." ”
The mother-in-law said: "I understand that habits are not easy to change. I cook so many dishes and I also hope that everyone can have a happy meal. But you young people are busy, and I understand it simply. You think clearly that your happiness is the most important thing. ”
I nodded, moved and relieved. I decided to leave my mother-in-law-to-be's house and continue with my life. I said goodbye to her sincerely, and she understood and blessed me. I finally saw my life plan, and the life of my mother-in-law was not what I wanted. But I will think about the warmth and touching of her life.
After leaving my mother-in-law-to-be's house, I re-examined my life plan. I originally had a good vision for this relationship, but through this time, I found that there were differences in our lives, and I didn't want to face these problems after marriage.
In fact, my differences with my boyfriend go far beyond our living habits. He is introverted and likes to stay at home: I like to go out and meet my classmates and friends. He doesn't like socializing, but I like to socialize with different people.
This time with my mother-in-law-to-be made me rethink the life I wanted. I like simple happiness, while their family is more traditional and conservative. If I get married, I'm afraid I'll lose the space to be myself.
Just when I was tangled, my best friend Xiaoli called me and asked me out to play. I hesitated, but said yes.
"Xiaofang, I heard that you broke up? Come out and relax, I invite you to watch a movie! Xiao Li's voice was very lively.
"Okay, then go out and change your mood." I promised her.
After watching the lighthearted and humorous romantic comedy with Xiaoli, my mood is indeed much better. We went back to nagging and talked about the breakup.
"Oh, you said that you went to your mother-in-law-to-be's house to experience life, and found that your habits were too different? It's also too important that breaking up is the right choice! "Xiaoli supports me.
I nodded: "Yes, the influence of living habits is too great, I can't get used to that kind of life at all." ”
Xiaoli held my hand and said, "The most important thing is that you are happy and happy. Marrying the wrong person will regret it for the rest of your life. ”
I thought about it and thought she was right. My own happiness is the most important thing, and I can't sacrifice myself to adapt to others.
Later, I also talked to other girlfriends about it. They understood me very well and didn't blame me for refusing to marry my boyfriend. This gives me a lot of peace of mind.
I began to face life positively and re-plan my future. Maybe I'm not in a relationship right now and can devote myself to work and achieve other goals.
What happened during this time made me grow a lot. I learned to see things from my own point of view, rather than blindly adapting to others. It is not selfish to choose your own happy life.
After this experience, I re-examined my life plan. I think I'm still young, I can focus on developing my career first, and love and marriage are temporarily put second. I set a goal to get promoted and raise my salary within three years and accumulate enough financial resources to consider getting married and having children.
I first made a detailed career plan, took stock of my professional skills, and mapped out a path for gradual improvement. I also took the initiative to contact the leader and expressed my desire to learn and develop. The leader appreciated my enterprising spirit and arranged an important new project for me.
Through hard work, I performed well in this project, which was affirmed by the leadership and praised by the customer. I have also gained valuable work experience from the project, which greatly increases my professional skills. This is very beneficial for my future career.
While actively working, I also focus on increasing my knowledge and attending some training courses outside of work. I learned simple financial management, time management and other skills, which made my work and life more organized. It also laid the foundation for me to be a good wife and mother in the future.
Through this period of hard work, I also saved a little savings and bought my first stock investment. It was a small first step towards my financial freedom. I also have more confidence to face my future married life.
Just as I was busy with my career, my mother suddenly called and said, "How about we introduce you to a few people?" ”
I smiled and said, "Mom, I have to develop my career well now, and I have to be financially independent, so I can postpone my marriage for a few years." I'll find the right person myself, so don't worry. ”
After hearing this, my mother was a little surprised at first, but quickly expressed understanding and support: "Mother didn't expect you to be so mature and assertive." You are right, the most important thing is to be independent in your own career, so follow your own plan. ”
Through this incident, my relationship with my mother has also become closer. She began to respect my ideas instead of forcing me to comply. I feel more initiative in life.
I am very happy to strive for my ideals. I believe that one day in the future, I will meet my like-minded spouse. At that time, we will work hand in hand to create happy families together.
After more than a year, my career has improved tremendously, and my income has more than doubled. This achievement stems from my continuous learning of new skills and taking on various important projects in the company. Now I have been promoted to department manager with several employees.
At the same time, my life has become more colorful. I signed up for a calligraphy course, which not only increased my hobbies, but also met a lot of like-minded friends. We set up a group that meets regularly to discuss various topics in our work life, which has broadened my circle of life.
Under the introduction of a friend, I met a young and promising entrepreneur named Li Hao. He has only been in business for two years, and the company is gaining momentum. When I dated him, I found that the two of us were surprisingly well in tune – with similar interests and hobbies, and the same ideal life plan.
"I want to fully develop my career now and strive for early success. I also want to postpone marriage and children a few years later. "I once said this when talking about ideals.
"Me too, now that the company has reached a critical juncture, I want to give it my all. If you have a foundation for your career in the future, it is not too late to think about your personal life. Li Hao's eyes shone brightly.
"Then let's work together to achieve our ideals as soon as possible, and then form a happy family." I said happily. Li Hao also nodded seriously.
The days of dating Li Hao were very happy. We support each other's ideals, rather than blindly urging to get married and have children. The relationship is very relaxed.
When we came home for the Chinese New Year, my mother and I brought up the topic of marriage again.
"Mom, don't worry, I've met a good partner. We all want to develop our careers first, and we will get married in the future. I said with a smile.
"As long as you're happy." The mother said with relief.
Now I join hands with my ideal partner and strive for a better future. I am also grateful for this feeling, reminding me to live for my happiness. Choosing the initiative in my life is the most valuable gain in my growing up. Finally, I was no longer disoriented, but moved forward towards the light with strength.