#讲好中国文化#
I once wrote an article "The relationship between husband and wife is greater than the relationship between parents and children",
Now that I think about it, it's stupid.
That article explained that the relationship between husband and wife is greater than the relationship between parents and children, and greater than the relationship with parents.
This view is really toxic.
Let me ask, if a man gambles and loses all the money in the family, does he want the woman to put the relationship with the man first?
Ask again, if a woman plays cards, does not care about anything at home, and does not take care of children, does the man want to put the relationship with the woman first?
The third question, if a person, after marriage, has several lovers, but he puts the needs of his spouse first, in addition to not satisfying fidelity to his spouse, not single-minded, everything else is based on the needs of his spouse, such a person, if you are his spouse, will you put him first? Men and women ask
The theory that the relationship between husband and wife is greater than the relationship between parents and children is greater than the relationship with parents, which is transmitted from abroad, about a country of goodness. Their parents raised their children only until they were 18 years old, after which the children were responsible for their own finances, so this theory arose.
But is this in line with our national conditions in China?
Obviously, it does not conform.
Chinese parents are the parents in the world who are attentive to their children. Of course, there are individual cases that are not worthy of parenthood. There are cases in all countries, abandoning babies.
Most Chinese parents will provide their children's living expenses until the child graduates, or until the child works, maybe junior high school, maybe high school, maybe university, maybe graduate school, maybe doctorate. What's more, after graduation, those who play games or lie flat at home are also supported by their parents.
A large number of parents will prepare a house, car, bride price for their children, and prepare dowry for their children.
After marriage, the children start a family and live separately from their parents. In fact, as early as when I went to college, I just went home during winter and summer vacations, or I didn't go home during winter and summer work. After work, I go home for the New Year's holiday.
After the child becomes a family, some parents will become anxious, just like suddenly feeling that their child no longer belongs to them, and they want to desperately want to grab it, so some parents are especially mothers. This kind of mother will interfere with the life of the young couple, from sleeping or not pulling the curtains, how the children sleep, room placement, to human relations, who to send what to whom and how much, with whom, not with whom, the daily life of the little two wants to ask. Including the man's mother, including the woman's mother, most of the small two live with the man's parents or are close to the man's parents, so the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law conflict is formed.
Who to put first after marriage depends on the actual situation.
If husband and wife love and work together for the small family, then the relationship between husband and wife comes first.
If the woman Voldemort, the man naturally puts the child first
The wife of a man who is a mom boy will most likely not take the man first.
If the man works hard to earn money to support the family, the woman takes care of the children and protects the family. In this case, the spouse puts the spouse first.
If one of the elderly people is sick or hospitalized, of course, the elderly person who needs care is put first, and the whole family works together to help the elderly recover
In most cases, both husband and wife think about the small family, and both men and women strive to build a small family, take care of the children, and protect the family. It is recommended that couples put their spouse first.
