He Suohuan, a writer of sexual affective psychology, writes love stories, interesting strangers, and material knowledge.
I watched a movie and shared it with you for the first time;
I read a book and shared with you the sentences and reading experience for the first time;
I ate a meal of braised pork, the dish was just served, and I took pictures and sent them to you as soon as possible;
Walking on the road, seeing the breath of spring, and seeing stray cats on the side of the road, they will also share with you.
You think I'm doing this to find a topic to talk about; Actually, I just want to share my life with you.
Sharing it with you makes me feel: "We're all in this together."
For adults, the most romantic relationship is not to say "I love you", but "when you love each other, share with each other".
-01
The desire to share is the highest level of romance
1. The desire to share is an expression of love
How can you tell if the other person likes you?
It depends on whether he is willing to take the initiative to "share" with you.
Share your life, share your work, share your mood, and even share some privacy about yourself.
Do you think it's boring for the other person to chat with you every day?
No, in fact, he wants to have more presence in front of you; He wants you to get to know him and to go further with your relationship.
From a psychological point of view:
The desire to share is often full of a person's expression.
His emotions, his thoughts, all his thoughts, all his thoughts, are all hidden in it.
Today's sunshine is good, the wind is very gentle, two people who love each other talk to each other, this is the calmest and most delicate romance.
2. The desire to share is an "important means" to maintain feelings
In intimate relationships, the desire to share can also be understood as "communication".
Only with stable communication can your relationship tend to be stable;
Without communication, feelings will go downhill.
In the emotional counseling cases I have worked with, more than half of people who have problems in their relationship or marriage have the essential reason: "lack of communication."
Either it's too lazy to communicate;
Either they try to communicate with each other themselves, but they are not answered;
Either one side is cold and violent, and the other is impatient.
In short, communication problems basically determine the direction of feelings.
What corresponds to the desire to share?
It's the degree of feedback.
When the opposite sex is around:
You pursue someone you like, send messages to each other, send a dozen or even dozens of messages a day, this is your desire to share.
If the other party responds to you in a timely manner, it is "high feedback"; If the other party does not reply to the message, it is "low feedback".
In love, marriage, the same is true.
It can even be said that in any relationship, the desire to share is very important;
And while we share, we are eager to get timely feedback from each other.
Receiving positive feedback, we feel happy in our hearts and expect to be satisfied;
Feedback is low, we are frustrated and disappointed.
-02
The strongest form of love is "sharing"
What are the three most romantic words for couples to get along? It's not that I love you.
But:
"I'll accompany you, with me, don't be afraid."
The core point of these three words can be summed up in one word: sharing.
For lovers, sharing is "empathy and responsibility".
Be able to understand each other's emotions and accompany him during his emotional trough;
Be able to tolerate his little temper and be willing to give understanding;
Being able to face something with him instead of running away;
Be able to share small goals, such as: working together for marriage, to give the relationship a perfect outcome.
For couples, responsibility is "family responsibility and dedication".
What is family responsibility?
There is a word in psychology called "participation."
Involvement in running a family, involvement in caring for children, involvement in caring for parents; These directly affect the relationship between the husband and wife.
Couples with high participation often have "enough tacit understanding, work together, and share happiness and suffering".
Husband and wife, help each other, encourage each other, support each other;
In the most difficult times, do not abandon each other and share the burden;
After development, do not forget the original intention, live up to each other;
The greater the sense of family responsibility, the better the relationship between the couple.
The more involved you are, the more you give to your family.
It's just that some people are selfish in marriage.
Like what:
Only willing to enjoy, not willing to give;
Just want results, don't want to put in time, energy and emotion;
Only care about their own feelings, but do not consider the hard work of their families;
Just accusations, complaining, but not knowing praise and understanding.
The most stable husband and wife relationship must be "responsible".
A partner who can be happy is not called love;
A partner who can share suffering is true love.
Today's Topic:
Do you think that "sharing desire and responsibility" are important in relationships?
(Picture source network)