This year is the 14th year that Xiaowen has entered the modeling industry,
But she is still curious about the modeling industry:
"The industry changes a lot,
I've been adjusting myself to keep up with the rhythm. ”
It takes courage to keep up with the times,
When courage falls on work,
It will bring awakening.
Now Xiaowen is more active at work,
Because she understands better what she and others want.
As long as a picture is formed in the mind,
She communicates and expresses.
When ambiguity and immaturity are replaced by clarity and skill,
The connotation of fashion is transmitted,
The boundaries of the self are broadened,
All fun is the joy of being with yourself.
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At a certain point during the shooting, a sense of happiness suddenly surged in Yan Xiaowen's heart, which also reminded her of a dream before. In her dream, she stepped into a garden, surrounded by colorful and fragrant flowers, and finally, she herself slowly turned into a flower.
There have always been thousands of explanations for dreams, and what Yan Xiaowen can be sure of is that the spring of revival of all things and her attention to detail are very in harmony. Autumn is certainly beautiful, but it is heading for withering, withering, and long winters. Spring shoots may be insignificant, but they are developing towards new life and are in a hopeful state.
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Xiaowen now lives in Shanghai. On a sunny spring day, she would walk the streets, bask in the sun, and watch the tree bud bud and another flower bloom there. Through the small details that come across chance, beauty and hope leap into view. She loves to drive, and along the way she can see different street scenes for each season. Occasionally standing on the balcony and appreciating the color changes between the plants and the surroundings, she also feels magical.
The feeling of spring, the things she loves to do in spring, is very much like the metaphor of Xiaowen: she is sensitive to the subtle changes in the world around her, and she is immersed in the things and things she loves.
When it comes to what she likes, her tone will rise with excitement. Once she shares her feelings about life, she will express her relaxed and playful posture in smart and accurate words. Our chat began with this perception of spring.
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As a model, Xiaowen has achieved too many results. He entered the industry in 2009 and signed with the New York modeling agency IMG in his early 20s, ranking among the global supermodels list of the authoritative website Models and ranking first on the rookie list. She has traveled all over the fashion capitals of New York and Milan, and she has been featured in international fashion weeks and favored by luxury brands. In 2016, in Paris, she made her Victoria's Secret show debut.
When the media and brands evaluate Xiaowen, they invariably use adjectives such as eccentric and ghostly horse lively. She knows this: "If you leave such an impression on everyone, it is also a very happy thing." But everyone is multifaceted, and so is her, "It's not the same with yourself, with your family, with your intimate lovers." In people's hearts, they always need to leave a space for themselves. ”
One of the spaces that Xiaowen left for herself is movies. Recently, she watched "Warm Inner Light" starring Jim Carrey. Regarding this movie, she commented on it with "giant romance" and "very good": "I like Jim Carrey so much, I feel that in this movie, I can see his shadow in reality." Compared with Jim Carrey's slightly exaggerated performance in other films, the more life-like interpretation of "Warm Inner Light" deeply touched Xiaowen, and she said half-jokingly: "I want to worship him as a teacher." Perhaps, Jim Carrey's multifaceted nature also made Xiaowen think of herself.
Three years after returning to China, Yan Xiaowen has tried to "electrocute". In 2021, she made a cameo appearance in the movie "Qingya Collection", and then played a factory girl looking for a lover in the short film "Night Belongs to Love". To outsiders, this may mean greater ambition in the career. But she still sees it as an extension of her job. On the one hand, every industry requires a lot of time and effort, interlacing like a mountain, and it is difficult to climb the sky if you want to be proficient; On the other hand, from Yan Xiaowen's own point of view, the essence of the role is not separated from the modeling profession and her person, more like a true color performance.
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Through making movies, Xiaowen has a more sober self-understanding. Being a model and being an actor have to face the camera. The difference is that the fashion lens shows the model and the clothing, the model plays freely, the camera captures it, and the person is more active in it. Under the film lens, the actor must accurately give the information to the camera, waiting for the audience to care, triggering resonance: "Film shooting is a fake state, but it must convey real feelings." After testing the waters of film, Xiaowen recognized the difference between her and the modeling industry, and did not plan to try acting frequently until she was ready.
Making trade-offs is not an easy task, and behind it is self-knowledge. Only self-knowledge can be self-consistent, and because of self-consistency, can we be self-satisfied.
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Xiaowen is a person who is good at following the trend. In the past three years since returning to China, she has experienced a lot of things, and her mentality has also fluctuated and changed. She is easily affected by the environment, and when immersed in it, she will seem to be shrouded, but she will not really be cruel to the environment, just adjust herself, even on a smoggy day, she will find a way to live happily. Also due to homeopathy, she is slower, not good at planning, and goes wherever she goes.
Of course, all this did not happen overnight.
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Yan Xiaowen has been practicing tennis recently, and in addition to her skills, she has gained other things.
"I play easily without strength, and the coach said I used too much energy and spent nervousness and overthinking these extra places outside of playing." Yan Xiaowen listened to the coach's words and suddenly had an epiphany: "I just thought about whether my life is like this." Before I start doing something, shouldn't I put aside too many thoughts and focus on the thing itself? ”
Yan Xiaowen associates this state of self-forgetfulness with the popular "flow" in recent years. Happiness is always fleeting, and she has had the difficulties she has struggled to pursue in her wandering life, and it was not until she felt flow in the past two years that she discovered that overthinking itself was an obstacle to flow. As long as you are immersed, focused, even if you play a game, you can have rare happiness.
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It has only been more than a year since she came into contact with tennis, and Xiaowen already enjoys watching tennis matches. In her eyes, those powerful tennis players are like characters in martial arts novels, each with their own temperament characteristics and completely different styles. When watching the game, she is easily moved by what the athletes show, especially Nadal, "he is pure flow, forget the time, forget the score, just immerse himself in the idea of how to play this ball now, sometimes he has won but is still in the state of the game." In this way, it is difficult to defeat a person with divine help. ”
Feeling the flow, Yan Xiaowen opened the door to a new world. She is already easy to linger in the imagination and picture, and when she encounters wonderful movies, it becomes easier to invest. When shooting, Flow will take her to wander in a freer and more relaxed world, and the moving moment will come unexpectedly, and the work will be extremely happy.
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The profession of modeling, non-stop when busy, free, also has a lot of time of their own. It may also be due to flow, Yan Xiaowen's "leisure time" has no utilitarian meaning, and when she thinks of what to do, she will not do pre-retrieval and post-event summary. For example, watching movies, it is all about fate, she does not like to do her homework in advance. She also watches programs such as "Thirteen Invitations" and "Round Table Party", and cares about global news and celebrity dynamics, but this is not a conscious study, but the ideas and ways of thinking of these people will bring her inspiration. For a while, her WeChat avatar was Luffy, the protagonist of the comic "The Sea King", "The characters in "The Sea King" are very pure, have ego, no matter what happens, they can't change their standards. ”
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These are all things that Yan Xiaowen was deeply interested in, and she is as happy as a glutton. On the contrary, if she is forced to enter something, she is prone to fall into an empty or even chaotic emotional state. Hobbies look complex, there are no obvious rules to follow, will it be too fragmented? Xiaowen's answer was: "I always have a guide in my head, a voice arranging, to do this today, tomorrow should be interested in this, and when I really need it, those things that are absorbed separately can be expressed." "The so-called blessing to the soul may also be the result of casual flow.
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Before crossing the threshold of 30 years old, Xiaowen had anxiety, some social pressure from the outside, and some confusion from the heart. She freely admits that this is exactly what most of her peers share.
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Now, Yan Xiaowen has found an outlet that is in line with flow: "My solution is not to think about it, don't care about the outside sound, don't think about age, and it will pass." "It's easy to say, do it with twists and turns, know that thinking too much is useless, increase trouble, really practice, or devote yourself to what you love to divert attention." Yan Xiaowen said that the process of overcoming age anxiety is of course painful, but it is also something that everyone has to go through, "In this case, instead of struggling to think about how to solve it, it is better to put the body and mind in a more comfortable state, try to control as little as possible, and often you are the one who can't let go of yourself." ”
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This year is the 14th year that Xiaowen has entered the modeling industry. It is said that the freshness will be difficult to maintain, but she is still curious about the modeling industry: "The industry has changed a lot, and I have been adjusting myself to keep up with the rhythm." She gave the example of two years. Because travel is not as convenient as before, online shooting and emerging technologies are more used in the modeling industry, and some avatars are even reminiscent of Jinmin's films.
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"There's a lot more that can be done in a virtual world, but how do we get into that world, and what virtual clothes and models look like, makes me think a lot." Xiaowen sees the direction of fashion development, and admits that there are more unimaginable trends, "Just like children learn to program now, this is their language, I really don't know anything about these." Or maybe I live in an ancient era and suddenly give me a mobile phone, and I have no idea what it is for. This situation made her feel that she had no time to burn out if she had to keep up.
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It takes courage to keep up with the times. The fledgling Xiaowen has a sense of vigor, has experienced more, but has things that she dare not do, which will make her thoughts constrain her hands and feet, "I think fear is really the culprit that destroys human imagination and action." ”
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Xiaowen's view of the relationship between fear and growth is confirmed in Avatar: The Way of Water. "In the first part, the male protagonist is a fearless person, and in the second part, he has a family and a stumbling block, and he can't be himself completely. In the end, he broke his worries and fears to grow. Xiaowen said that the momentum of youth will contain an element of ignorance, not knowing what the difficulty is, just striding forward. After experiencing and learning more, how to regain the courage she had at that time is her current topic.
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When courage falls on work, it brings awakening. Yan Xiaowen, who first glimpsed the model's door, took a lot of photos and walked the catwalk, but she was somewhat ignorant. It wasn't until she gradually appreciated the value of "authenticity" and understood the relationship between body, clothing, lens and scene that the transformation quietly took place.
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Now Xiaowen is more active at work because she understands better what she and others want. As long as the picture is formed in her mind, she communicates and expresses it. When ambiguity and immaturity are replaced by clarity and sophistication, the connotation of fashion is transmitted, the boundaries of the self are broadened, and all pleasures are the joys of getting along with the self.
Executive Producer/MIX WEI
Photo by Liu Song
IMAGE & EDITOR/AUSTIN FENG
Copy-editing / ChicoChan
Written by/Fu Kick Kick
MAKEUP/CLIVE. X
HAIRSTYLE/JOHN ZHANG
Production & Art / Oolong OOLONG
STYLING ASSISTANCE/TIFFANY XI, PEKO, SOUR PLUM, IKE
New Media Executive Producer/Fionn
Executive Producer/Siqi
Edit/Echo
Director/Zhang Heng
Videography/Sun Yue Haoran
Video color grading/Sour
online/Lok
Voiced by: Xu Jiahua Millie
Editorial assistants/Chen Siquan, He Xiaoqing
Assistant Director/Vivian
Video production / Norns Studio
Poetry/Indian Serenade