Generational relatives, also known as generational relatives. Before I was promoted to grandpa, I didn't understand this, and I rarely talked about it. Because without that experience, naturally there is no way to talk about it.
On February 19, 2019 (the fifteenth day of the first month), when I was on the bus to visit my daughter's grandfather, I learned from the WeChat message from Sydney that I had become my daughter's grandfather, and I suddenly felt that the corners of my eyes were wet and then tears. At that moment, the next generation was born with tears wrapped in tears. I immediately "drew" on the handwritten screen of my mobile phone to "I didn't just get a baby pig", and when I got home, I sorted it out on the computer and soon published it in "Life Daily".
It is often said that people's hearts are separated by a belly, and a thin belly is separated by an unfathomable depth, not to mention a distance of fifty or sixty years. But why do generations become more and more separated?
For three years, I often think of this topic, but I have never dared to write, always hoping that "if there is a god" to help. When my granddaughter was three years old, I calmed down, slowly combed through, and sketched out the "alternate generation of pro-picture books" from the following aspects, hoping to add your pictures and colors.
Time. The best confession of true love in the world, and it is also said that the most priceless love in the world is called companionship. Because companionship does not require money investment, you can withdraw itself from the time bank without swiping a card or entering a password. We know that after young couples give birth to a baby, responsibility and happiness fall from heaven, and the former is as heavy as Tarzan, or the pressure is great. In order to create a better tomorrow for the baby, in order to pay off the debts and human feelings left behind when they got married, they regard the workplace as a battlefield, devote themselves to struggle, work hard, and must not have a moment of rest. Go out against the stars, wear the moonlight home, merge the washing shabu into the same kind and reduce it to a minimum or even leave it to the parents to take care of, but brushing the vibrato brushes the fingers straight and trembling, and also has to leave golden time for sliding with the fingers that grow calluses quickly on the fashion stages such as Taobao, Pinduoduo, and Meituan. At this time, the baby's grandparents and grandparents (hereinafter referred to as grandparents) are between the ages of fifty and sixty. In the unit, in the field, in the factory and mine, most of them have entered the tail end of the career, and it is more difficult to go up, so the ship to the dock car to the station is not what you don't want. Some women in their fifties give up everyone and return to their small families, even if many grandparents do not retire and still work, but the time at their disposal is relatively a lot of money to be caught... At this moment, grandchildren have arrived, filling in the idle window of their time. Therefore, the generations of people eat and live together and bear the burden of wind and rain, and the days are long, and the feelings breed. Some people also say: the grandfather's sunset in the west, the grandchildren's rising sun rises in the east, the two suns embrace each other, hugging the group for warmth, which is called warm and happy.
Economically. I think that at the beginning, in order for the children to start a family, under normal circumstances, the grandparents were basically squeezed dry, and the body was deflated; when they were promoted to the grandfather, all kinds of debts must have been basically cleared, and some loans were still in place, and the automatic allocation was transferred to Bao Dad and Bao Mom. Coupled with older age (except for serious illnesses and disasters), human sophistication is relatively reduced, and self-consumption is much less. In the past, the general tone of consumption that had been adopted as "one penny into two cents" ("one penny is broken into two cents") is now complete, and the social security system is becoming more and more perfect, and there is not much to worry about, so the string of saving money is loosened. Set up a change of Anhui Fengyang that year's big bag to do that sentence, that is, "pay enough for the pension, leave enough daily expenses, the rest are dolls." More money is spent more, less money is spent less, no money is not spent often hanging on the lips. There is also this money that does not bring death and does not take away, sooner or later are children's, early flowers fall into feelings, late flowers provoke suspicion and complaints, not to mention that the small needs of grandchildren can not spend much silver, so as long as the baby opens his mouth can be satisfied, at the same time, he harvests a full sense of achievement. In fact, there is a small secret that cannot be said, that is, to open your heart and pockets to your grandchildren, and maybe you can earn back some interest on the love of your parents and parents.
Emotionally. In the human world, due to the inheritance of blood thicker than water affection, coupled with the fermentation of age, the nature and instinct of the elderly to love children are naturally exerted to the extreme. Generally speaking, father and son, mother and daughter will meet narrowly due to menopause and rebellion, the light one rolls over the white eye, the middle one has a high octave, the heavy one is lip-tongued, and screwing, smoke, and conflict are the main themes of this time period. Hoping for a dragon, hoping for a woman to be a phoenix, coupled with the wind of comparison, various tutoring classes have pressed children to stand up straight and breathless, and the name is that children cannot lose at the starting line. As everyone knows, life only has a finish line, so what starting line is dangling in front of you. The child has been wronged, naturally to find an outlet to vent, it just so happens that the grandfather has naturally become a punching bag and a spit pot. At this time, the grandparents learned the bitter lesson of emotional resistance and hatred brought about by the high-pressure policy of their children, and usually set small goals for the third generation to be safe, happy and healthy. As "Often Go Home to See" sings: The old man does not want his children to make much contribution to the family, and it is not easy to make a reunion in a lifetime. It is reasonable to say that this word is not inspirational enough, not positive enough, but it is full of human common feelings, so this song has often haunted the corners of life for more than twenty years. Some people say that in order to make up for the emotional destruction of their children, the grandfather redoubled his kindness to his grandchildren, but the author did not have this experience and did not dare to speak in vain. Some people also say that the grandparents put the goals that could not be achieved in the children over the grandchildren, and I am afraid that this theory does not make sense. Others say that the grandparents deliberately copied the grandchildren after successfully shaping their children, which may have some truth. As a result, the grandparents and the babies formed an indestructible united front. As the saying goes, old children, small adults, the two ends to the middle of a compromise, thereby reducing the gap between the generations of altitude to bring about estrangement, communication is much more convenient. At this time, most of the grandfathers and daughters shared a sharp reduction in the topic, saying that they seriously injured their feelings, saying that it was useless to say that it was light, and simply keeping their mouths shut. Some people say that the elderly and children are emotionally complementary, which can also make sense. It is no wonder that teasing grandchildren and children and grandchildren around the knees is the best picture of the happiness of the elderly, and the ultimate goal, even if fu shou is a widow cow, is also happy in it.
This kind of generational relatives not only exists in the world, but also continues to the underground. In the ranking of the temple, the ancestors are centered, and the descendants are divided into left and right sides. Zi Ju is Zhao on the left, and Sun Li is Mu on the right. And so on. The ranking of the ancestral names of each ancestral hall is handled in this way. The halls and houses of the Central Plains are all upright and hanging "Ancestral Zhaomu Divine Seat", to put it bluntly, it is to invite all ancestors to sit in the order to enjoy the delicacies and delicacies and jade liquids offered by their descendants. The result of the left son and the right grandson is that the next generation is on the side, the grandfather and grandson are close, and the father and son live opposite each other. Whether this system of Zhaomu is influenced by intergenerational relatives or provides corroboration for intergenerational relatives is unknown.
Bits and pieces, pulling this, I don't know if it's right or not, and I don't know if you agree? After all, we are separated by a magazine or a mobile phone screen.
Author: Wu Yongliang
Phone: 13505314350
One point number Wu Yongliang