Moments of Loss: 12 girls sharing about "lost"

Image: Bing Fang | Written by: Reader + Amo | Editor-in-Charge: Ke Xin

Hello, hello everyone, this is Amo.

Life is a long road, everyone is looking for it, in addition to the harvest in the process, it is inevitable to encounter various partings and losses.

Loss of loved ones, loss of love, loss of youth, loss of courage...... These losses are painful and allow us to grow.

Some time ago, we launched a #What moments have you ever had, realizing what you've lost forever? #的话题征集, I received a lot of shares from friends. Today, we have selected some of them to share with you, without further ado, let's take a look.

I have two girlfriends. One is the small hair that I grew up with, and we grew up together in life; the other is the confidant I knew when I was in the second year of junior high school, and we groped together in our growth. In high school, because of me, they knew each other, and the three of us ate and slept together throughout high school.

Later, when we went to college, we separated, but we have been in contact with WeChat. After work, I was in one city, they were in the same city, and one day I went to dinner with them, and at the dinner table they looked at each other and whispered and smiled, and I knew that I was going to lose both of them at the same time. That kind of sadness and loss is no less than a lost love.

▲ Image source: Soogif

When my ex-husband had children with another woman, the little home that belonged to me really didn't exist.

It was ridiculous to think that after a year of divorce, our relationship had gradually eased, and I thought that I might still have the possibility of saving the family. Unfortunately, the reality is not "self-righteous", and it is good to be injured twice for the same person, and at the same time lose the opportunity to let him hurt me again.

When I was still studying, my mother fell ill and left, and I didn't feel my mother's departure very deeply at that time.

Later, when I came home from summer vacation, no one cared what time I arrived at home, no one opened the door for me, and no one bought me the food I liked to eat early and waited for me to come back to eat, everything was different.

That summer I deeply felt my mother leaving, I cried for a holiday, I didn't adapt at all, I couldn't call my mother anymore.

When we were in love in college, he and I always liked to walk around the campus hand in hand, going to a distant rookie station to pick up a courier.

Then we broke up, and one day I saw him helping another girl with a courier, and the moment he turned his head and laughed with the girl, I realized that I had really lost him.

Probably the first Spring Festival after my grandfather left, when I could no longer receive the money given by my grandparents, I suddenly realized that I had really lost my grandfather.

And then there's the fact that I can't spend my birthday with my grandfather anymore.

It's been almost four years, and I'm still very sad every time I get to my birthday, how fateful I am to be able to have my grandfather's birthday on the same day.

Although he often counted me down, although he cared more about his brother, he would also take me out to play, buy me small strawberries, and pick me up from school. But I never saw him again.

Once I had a lot of hair like a pot lid, washing my hair was laborious, water-intensive, and conditioner-intensive.

Later, I gradually found that the conditioner was used less and less, and the telephone line that tied the hair was gradually oversized from thicker to the thinnest and smallest.

I realized that what I had lost was not only my hair, but also my youth.

When I saw on my dad's phone a sister who was four years older than me and called him a husband, I knew that the man who had always thought was upright, responsible for marriage, and the best in the world was dead, at the age of 26.

When I found out that I had cooked the meal, no one said to me with joy in front of my face, "Sister, your dishes are delicious, I like to eat them." No one sat next to me to eat, no one helped me clean up after eating, and my brother who had been accompanying me had already gone to heaven.

No matter how long you have been gone, I still miss you, and you will always be my brother in this life.

During the Cold War before we broke up, I went to him and wanted to have a good talk with him, only to stumble upon the chat history of the new person he and his colleague had introduced to him.

At that moment I felt no need to talk about it, I lost him, and he really lost me.

Before I went to college, I learned that my grandmother had cancer, and because the elderly people couldn't use their smartphones, I called her once a week to chat with her.

I worked hard to participate in the competition during my college years, and I shared any honors with her for the first time, even if it was an excellent award, but Grandma would be very happy every time.

This semester, however, no one has shared with me any honors that may seem insignificant to others.

▲ Image source: Giphy

When I was a child, I always wanted to become a sixth-grade older sibling, a junior senior, and a bigger adult, but when I gradually became the "older brother and sister" and "senior sister" I hoped for when I was young, I gradually realized that I no longer longed to become an adult, and I missed the past even more.

I saw a sentence in an article: "I used to think that I was an adult when I permed my hair, and my mother laughed and said, 'When you don't desperately want to be an adult one day, you really grow up.'" Now that I look at the baby flower heads of some girls who are still in school, I suddenly think that my mother is right."

It was also from that moment that I realized that my childhood was really gone, and all that remained was smoothed out by society and became sleek and worldly, and what I once hated.

What is forever lost is pure emotion, and there is some past that has not been cherished.

As I grow older, I gradually socialize, unconsciously mixed with purpose in my feelings, and there are very few simple friendships.

Sometimes I am not used to such a self, but I will always be involuntary in it. Sometimes thoughts will drift to the past for a long time, and when you wake up, you always sigh, really and forever, you have lost the past that you have not cherished.

When I was a child, I always felt that some things were permanent and unchanging, and I didn't care about them. It's like the square that used to pass by every day to school, the hospital that used to be in front of the house, the grandmother's house that I used to go to during the summer vacation... With the development of the city, reconstruction, demolition, no longer exist, want to see again, it is impossible.

Life always makes us have and lose. But we are always unaware of what we have lost in the moment, or even realized that what we have lost is so important.

It wasn't until one day that I realized that it would never come back. How to face it will also become a task of our life.

I only hope that in these losses, everyone can learn to cherish what they have now.

Well, that's it for today, and if you still have some stories or ideas you'd like to share, feel free to move to the comments section.

If these stories touch you, remember to like them.

I love the world.