Editor / Little Love Letter
In 2011, "Wu Song" Ding Haifeng took his wife Tang Ge to participate in the variety show "Very Couple", and Tang Ge said the following about Ding Haifeng's intimate play with the actress:
"I can accept that he fell in love with the actress for a few minutes, as long as he can take his heart back."
As the wife of actor Ding Haifeng, Tang Ge has achieved the ultimate in empathy, and can even accept that Ding Haifeng is in love with others, so magnanimous, it is indeed unusual.
We all say that the essence of love is giving, possessiveness and sensitivity, but in Tang Ge, love is particularly different.
Even when Ding Haifeng proposed divorce and break up with her at the peak of her career, Tang Ge said without frowning:
"Okay, then let's separate, and I'll just go find the one who can read my poems."
Three points are cold, four points are careless, five points are stoic, very distant, as if they have never loved.
It is precisely this kind of personality that can afford to put down, so that Ding Haifeng is still unable to part ways with Tang Ge in the end, and after that, he wrote a tearful "peace letter" with a splash of ink, and Tang Ge did not agree too much.
It is said that the prodigal son does not change back to gold, but in the final analysis, it is to see whether the two people still love each other, and Tang Ge's attitude towards feelings is that she loves Ding Haifeng too much, or has she never loved?
Is a marriage with a fold a broken mirror or a repeat of the mistakes of the past?
01
The first time I met Ding Haifeng was in a kindergarten where Tang Ge worked, and she was still a preschool teacher.
Ding Haifeng, who just graduated from Jilin Technical School, used his spare time to join the "Mountain Tiger Band", which is considered to be an unemployed vagrant.
It was like this two people who slowly came together after a year of knowing each other.
In fact, at that time, Tang Ge was very beautiful, his figure was good, and he could completely choose a boyfriend with better conditions than Ding Haifeng's conditions, but Tang Ge was interested in Ding Haifeng's sincerity and was deeply fascinated by it.
When they were just together, Ding Haifeng would often come to the kindergarten to see Tang Ge, and although he could only say a few words in a hurry every time, he was very happy for Tang Ge at that time.
Once when the two were sitting together and chatting, Tang Ge accidentally saw that Ding Haifeng's white shirt was a little dirty, so he gently told Ding Haifeng that the next time he came, he could give her dirty clothes, and she could help wash them.
Logically, this is just Tang Ge's polite words, who knows that the next time Ding Haifeng comes, he will really bring a lot of dirty clothes to Tang Ge, including the white shirt that was dirty last time.
When he saw a large pile of dirty clothes, Tang Ge couldn't help but sigh, but he didn't dislike Ding Haifeng because of this, but felt that he was really sincere.
Having seen the gentleness of the mass seller, this sincerity is precious.
And Ding Haifeng saw that Tang Ge did not abandon himself and helped himself wash all the dirty clothes, and he felt that Tang Ge was not only a beautiful and kind person, but also industrious and would live a life.
So the two young people who already had love for each other planned to enter the palace of marriage and start a family together, but the marriage between the two was actually not very agreeable.
Ding Haifeng's parents felt that Ding Haifeng should not find a woman older than himself to marry, but should find a little girl younger than himself to marry and live.
And Tang Ge's parents felt that why their daughter wanted to find a man younger than themselves to marry, and felt that Tang Ge should find an older one who would take care of people more.
In addition, they feel that Ding Haifeng is too handsome, easy to attract flowers and butterflies, and is not suitable for getting married and living.
However, even if their parents objected, the two people who loved each other at that time decided to get married without hesitation, and they met for the rest of their lives.
Speaking of marriage, Tang Ge and Ding Haifeng will not have any so-called marriage proposal ceremony, Tang Ge is a very romantic person, but Ding Haifeng is not, so many things Ding Haifeng is retreating to the second.
When they got married, Tang Ge said to Ding Haifeng:
"I don't want anything, but I have to have a piano for my wedding."
But at that time, a brand new piano was too expensive, so Ding Haifeng went to the second-hand market to buy a second-hand piano for Tang Ge.
Later, when they got married, they didn't even have a wedding car to pick up the bride, and Ding Haifeng just randomly stopped a car on the side of the road to pick him up and Tang Ge to get married.
Perhaps it is precisely because of this hasty wedding ceremony that all of Tang Ge's colleagues and friends are not optimistic about the marriage of the two people, and even ask bluntly when they meet:
"You two are not divorced yet, are you okay?"
And the slightly accommodating emotional experience of the two people is also doomed to the marriage of the two will not be smooth.
But if there is a smooth sailing in the world, as long as there is a problem in the heart of the two people, then the two people will be able to go to the end.
02
After marriage, the two did not change their respective life directions because they had a family, Tang Ge continued to work as a preschool teacher, and Ding Haifeng continued to work towards his dream of being an actor.
At that time, Ding Haifeng often needed to run around the country because of filming, and sometimes a business trip was several months.
At that time, communication was not developed, and Tang Ge could only express his thoughts about Ding Haifeng by writing letters.
It is also strange to say that tang ge likes to write, and often writes such a small poem of life in the name of writing to Ding Haifeng.
It's not so much that she misses her lover as she is praising life most of the time.
This way of getting along seems to be harmonious, in fact, there is still a relatively big problem, husband and wife have been separated for a long time, and over time it will also have an impact on feelings, but it did not break out at that time.
However, with more and more time for this gathering, there are still some problems in the marriage between the two, such as after Ding Haifeng starred in Wu Song.
In 1998, "Water Margin" was popular all over the streets, and Wu Song, played by Ding Haifeng, was rated by the audience as the most handsome and most suitable Wu Song of the original work, and he also suddenly became a popular actor, and later Ding Haifeng recalled that time:
"I woke up laughing a few times when I was on fire until I went to sleep, and I had to wear sunglasses on the street."
It was in this sudden explosion of popularity that Ding Haifeng's mentality at that time also began to change, and he felt that he would have a better future and deserve a more beautiful woman.
Obviously, he thinks that his wife who is a preschool teacher around him is no longer worthy of him now.
Tang Ge may also have had a premonition that this relationship may be coming to an end, when Ding Haifeng came to her and said that he would break up and divorce.
She suddenly remembered that Ding Haifeng had carefully asked her if she could be together, but at this time, it was already a thing or a person.
Although her heart was painful and sad, tang ge was still unwilling to show a point or two in front of Ding Haifeng because of her dignity, smiled and agreed to separate, and then cleanly packed up her things and left.
No quarrel, no fuss, no hysteria, and the most rational and cold way to face the results of this relationship.
But not long after, Ding Haifeng sent her a letter of peace, saying that he knew that he was wrong and hoped that Tang Ge would give him another chance.
It turned out that her operation stunned Ding Haifeng, who thought that Tang Ge would stir up trouble, but he did not expect that Tang Ge would leave her without nostalgia, and for a moment his heart seemed to be empty.
Without the discipline of Tang Ge, Ding Haifeng was not as happy as he could have imagined, and when he went out to shoot a drama, it happened to be next to the ancient town.
Walking in the ancient town, Ding Haifeng felt that it should not be him alone standing here to enjoy the beautiful scenery at this moment, but he and Tang Ge should be together.
After that, those memories of the past with Tang Ge lingered in Ding Haifeng's mind like a flood that broke the embankment, and also made Ding Haifeng, who was blinded by fame and fortune, gradually recognize the reality.
He loved Tang Ge far more than he thought, and no one in the world could be better than Tang Ge.
In this way, Ding Haifeng decided to go to Tang Ge to reunite and write the first letter in his life to Tang Ge, and although Tang Ge looked dashing when he left, he also washed his face with tears every day after that, immersed in sadness.
After seeing the letter written by Ding Haifeng, Tang Ge, who was still in love with him, decided to give each other another chance and reunited with Ding Feng.
The happiness of the lost and regained made Both Tang Ge and Ding Haifeng cherish it, and since this incident, no matter what contradictions occurred, no matter how fierce the quarrel, they had never had the idea of leaving each other.
But the marriage of the two people still seems to have irreconcilable contradictions, Ding Haifeng often works outside the filming, if the time is long, he can not stay at home for several months, leaving Tang Ge and his two children living at home.
Tang Ge gradually became accustomed to this way of life, and the two children had their own rhythm of life, accustomed to the days when Ding Haifeng was not living.
Every time Ding Haifeng came back from abroad and wanted to be close to her, such as holding hands and shoulders, Tang Ge would have physiological rejection and was very unaccustomed.
Moreover, as soon as Ding Haifeng returned, he fought with the two children, and Tang Ge saw that the rhythm of the child's life of getting up early and going to bed early was completely disrupted, and he couldn't help but get angry:
"You might as well not come back, because everything is messed up when you come back."
Ding Haifeng saw that Tang Ge had such an attitude towards the self he had not seen for a long time, and even couldn't help but wonder if she was someone outside, and in a fit of anger, he quarreled with Tang Ge and went out.
Tang Ge also felt inexplicable, obviously everything was fine before Ding Haifeng came back, and he would also call and chat every day, as soon as he came back, he was upset, and he was thinking about Ding Haifeng but called back.
The two communicated and chatted normally as before, and in the middle of the night, Tang Ge suddenly said:
"We quarrel as soon as we meet, so why don't you come back, let's be phone lovers."
This sentence is probably just an angry sentence, and the implication seems to be that Tang Ge is complaining that Ding Haifeng has given too little time to himself and too little time to accompany himself.
Ding Haifeng may also understand his irresponsibility for family feelings, and then reduce a lot of unnecessary work and spend more time on Tang Ge and his two children.
Therefore, what women sometimes want is actually very simple, nothing more than sincerity and companionship, these two things can bring Tang Ge a full sense of security.
In the past, she would be jealous and angry when she saw Ding Haifeng filming intimate scenes, but later she was able to accept Ding Haifeng shooting such scenes, and sometimes even pointed out one or two.
Married life has gradually become more harmonious, with fewer quarrels and occasionally some things that make two people laugh.
Once the two went out to eat together alone, preparing to live through the world of two people, but just after getting into the car, Ding Haifeng got on the car and sat on it and let the driver master drive, leaving Tang Ge alone in the same place at a loss.
After a while, it should be to the place, Tang Ge received a call from Ding Haifeng to ask people about it, Tang Ge said that Ding Haifeng did not let himself get on the car and left, the two were silent for a while and could not stop laughing.
Such embarrassing and funny things happened from time to time in their lives, although the life was ordinary, but there were also many pleasures that belonged to her and Ding Haifeng.
Later, she stopped writing poetry, because her life with Ding Haifeng was already romantic like a poem, making her feel the beauty of life and the true meaning of marriage.
03
The marriage of two people seems to reflect the problems that most couples will face, such as changing their hearts, separating for a long time, and so on.
The final outcome of the two depends on what the final attitude of the two people is and how they do it.
Tang Ge's approach is nothing more than a model for his wife, who is willing to accompany a man who has nothing to fight from scratch, and is willing to accept the request of a man who proposes to be separated.
But what is even more admirable is that she promised to really be able to put it down and start over after she promised to get back together.
In reality, prodigal sons look back and seek compounds everywhere, and there are many people who are willing to compound.
But after the compound, most people feel that the compound is just a repetition of the same mistakes, and there is always a thorn in their hearts, thinking that it will be the same as before, but they are not satisfied, thinking that they will undoubtedly win, but sometimes they will lose.
Therefore, if a woman can't do what Tang Ge is so free, take it up and down, don't easily turn back.
Of course, Tang Ge was also lucky, and he met Ding Haifeng, who really turned back.
Ding Haifeng is dedicated to his work, and recently starred in the hit drama "A Generation of Hong Shang", Xu Anbang, the Hongjiang regimental defense envoy, a leader of Hongjiang City, is a very elaborate villain, and is played by Ding Haifeng.
In terms of family life, although he has made mistakes, he is really correcting and being with Tang Ge in a down-to-earth manner.
Later, it was said that Tang Ge had suffered from cancer and was bedridden, so Ding Haifeng put down all his work and did his best to take care of it, although he did not know whether it was true or false, but he could also see the sincere feelings of the two people who suffered and shared from the side.
So what is love, more than two hundred romantic letters written by Tang Ge to Ding Haifeng, or the moment when Ding Haifeng stood under the ancient town and missed Tang Ge?
Love is probably Tang Ge's thousands of sighs and disappointments in this marriage, but he has been on the road ten million times, which is Tang Ge's unswerving firmness to Ding Haifeng until death.