Yulia has another boyfriend.
She could always get men to get caught up in her while she withdrew alone.
Her old lover, a handsome model, watched her fight with her new partner just a few meters away.
The snow drifting outside the house was like a man's heart, cold.
But Yulia didn't notice at all.
Her intimacy with Xin Huan rose like the fire in the middle, boiling hot.
Wait, strictly speaking, that model isn't a full boyfriend.
But Yulia had taken pictures for him, and the two of them looked at each other for a moment and did something happy.
Hello me, everyone does not suffer.
Coincidentally, Xinhuan thought the same thing.
Unfortunately, as soon as they finished, the man who drew the comic made it clear to her.
Yulia walked out of the cartoonist's room and stopped in the hallway—she suddenly realized that she was in love with the cartoonist.
So this is a scumbag lost story?
No, here's the story of the discussion where everyone has ever been lost:
#一个人要认清自己, how hard is it? #
Yulia is an ordinary college student, and she is at this stage: finding herself.
How to find it?
Change, change the way you live.
Originally, she was studying medicine, because this was worthy of her excellent grades.
However, she found that she did not like it.
So she switched to psychology and thought she was interested in the human mind rather than the body.
By the way, she also changed her boyfriend.
How can a new life accommodate the old?
Oh, and don't forget, and the hairstyle.
She cut her long hair and changed it into short, vigorous and neat hair.
freshman!
When she really went to the psychology class, she found that psychology, like medicine, had to memorize all kinds of knowledge by rote.
Bored.
The only thing that is a little interesting is the teacher's practice of psychology in the classroom.
The teacher gave an example:
Suppose Yulia and I met at a party and then we were attracted to each other...
Yulia understood.
When a person uses hypothetical situations to connect himself with someone, it means that he really wants to connect with that person.
So, they rolled the sheets.
But it's just a little spice up the boring life.
When Yulia brushed her phone, she suddenly brushed a very touching photo. The idea of becoming a photographer immediately arose in my heart.
She confessed to her mother: Now that I know, I want to be a photographer.
Although the mother hesitated, she did not object.
Yulia bought a camera with a student loan and worked part-time at a bookstore. You know, "photography is poor for three generations, and SLR ruins a lifetime".
Needless to say, she had no contact with the teacher again, and the tall and handsome model he was not fragrant?
Yulia is a young man who thinks one is one.
All of her changes came from that vague self.
That vague self kept reminding her that life was not what she wanted.
But on the contrary, I will not tell myself what I really want.
She was in an uneasy state of anxiety and could never calm down.
It also allows the outside world to always have the opportunity to interfere with her:
Life is not that there is no choice, but there are too many choices, and I don't know how to choose.
Like most people today, mobile phones and the mobile Internet became obstacles to her learning. She had to switch to an old Nokia and force the disconnection.
But superficial changes can never give her true peace of mind.
She wasn't as brave as she seemed.
Like her attitude towards feminism. She can argue with her boyfriend's friends or publish online about women's rights.
But when it came time to really involve herself, she backed off.
On her birthday, her father made excuses not to come, and even when her mother complained, she still defended her father:
He had back pain
When she went to her father's house, she asked him if he had read the article he had written. Dad made another excuse and said that he didn't know what was going on, clicked on the link article and disappeared.
Yulia immediately blamed herself for the problem:
Maybe it's my problem, maybe I'm sending the wrong version
But did she really love her father so much?
No, she only dared to vent her true emotions when she sniffed the magic mushroom and entered the fantasy world.
"The Worst Man in the World" is a story of a woman searching for herself, and there is bound to be a dilemma faced by women.
The inability to maintain a stable intimate relationship always prompts Yulia's feelings to change.
It seems that she is tired of her old love, but in fact, the vague self is at work again.
The fuse is the child.
The cartoonist boyfriend is old and wants to settle down, start a family, and have a child.
But Yulia is still very young, she is a big child herself, and she does not like children.
Partying with her boyfriend's friends allowed her to see the chicken feathers of a woman after having a family.
For example, forcing children to sleep.
The child was running around, and the mother could only chase the child and finally hold the child back to the bed.
The men played all day and had the energy to bounce around in the evening, and the women just wanted to sit and drink quietly. Yulia encourages her girlfriend to get up and dance.
Unexpectedly, the girlfriend was lifted up by her husband and hit her head on the chandelier.
A little bit, breaking the false beauty created by music, and breaking the truth of life at once.
After that, the quarrel between the two mouths came clearly.
But what's even more interesting is that the next morning, the two were reconciled at the beach.
This return to the old good drama did not move Yulia at all, she just smiled lightly.
At this time, she saw a rehearsal of her future life.
Trapped in family life - no passion - complaining and quarreling - barely repairing.
If you step into the siege of marriage, you will fall into this infinite cycle of husband and child-rearing, without self.
But, what is the self she is looking for?
I don't know.
So she had to break up with the cartoonist.
It is not that she does not love, but the cartoonist's stable and clear self reflects her confused embarrassment.
One plot goes like this:
Yulia is retouching, cartoonists are drawing.
When she finished fixing a picture, she wanted to talk to the cartoonist. But the cartoonist wore headphones and paid no attention at all.
She walked over and lifted her clothes to reveal her body, and the cartoonist just smiled when she saw it.
I don't want to stop what I'm doing.
Yulia's inability to immerse herself in her own world and the inability to pull the cartoonist out of his world made her helpless and jealous.
Cartoonists can devote themselves to what they want to do, while Yulia can't.
They are at different stages of life, and emotional changes are more likely to occur.
After meeting a handsome guy at a wedding, Yulia breaks up with the cartoonist again.
To put it in layman's terms, "The Worst Man in the World" is a story of a woman who makes a scene of heaven and earth, constantly seeking freshness.
What is reflected is the common confusion of modern people in self-pursuit.
Maybe we'll never find our true selves.
That constant self simply doesn't exist.
We can only grasp the emotion of the moment, and then be driven by this emotion to make a certain decision.
It's like the moment when Yulia and the cartoonist broke up.
One normal morning, the cartoonist helped her pour her coffee and she turned on the kitchen light.
For an instant, the world stood still.
She walked out the door, the grandmother who went upstairs stopped, the passers-by at work did not move, and the yoga people maintained a posture.
At this moment, only her soul was walking and running unscrupulously.
She ran to the restaurant where the ambiguous object worked, and the two embraced, kissed, went shopping, and chatted, from morning to night.
In this still world, only their souls are moving freely.
This moment is made up of countless moments.
She saw cartoonists playing with children;
She saw a middle-aged couple arguing and reconciling;
She heard cartoonists say that their characters were wild cats in the world of domestic cats;
The ambiguous object sucked in the smoke she spat out of her mouth.
All of these moments accumulate and become the decision to break up.
Without a clear self-pursuit, Yulia's decision depends on the intuition that comes in an instant.
Just like when she sees a brain model, she wants to be a psychologist, and when she sees a beautiful photo, she wants to be a photographer.
Maybe behind our own decisions is also the accumulation of many moments.
The moment of resignation, the moment of falling in love, the moment of breaking up, etc., there are many pleasant or painful experiences behind them.
The worst people in the world are also the most ordinary people in the world.
In the confusion, I keep trying and making mistakes, searching for the answer that doesn't know if it exists.
People with clear goals are happy.
They move towards the set goal, they may take a detour, they may go very hard, but they will not get lost.
This is a challenge that we all have to face.
What do you want to do, what kind of person you want to be, and how do you find yourself?
The answer is not in the movie, not in the chicken soup for the soul, or in the mouth of the person who came over.
That real self, only oneself keeps looking for it.
Keep getting closer, and that infinitely tends to the right answer.
Today's workers: Xu Laowei is cute