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Gu Ailing, who grew up abroad, represented China in the Winter Olympics and won the gold medal in one fell swoop.
Under the great honor and achievement, it is inevitable to question overwhelmingly, when the foreign media reporter asked her how to balance the criticism of others, she said very calmly:
"I don't exist to satisfy everyone, I just want to enjoy my life.
My essence is good, every decision I make is worthy of my heart, if others do not understand, it can only show that we have different values, can only show that their empathy is not enough to understand my goodwill.
I don't waste my time, and in people who don't have much education, if someone doesn't trust me or doesn't like me, it's their loss. ”
In a few simple words, we can see what a real patterned person is.
Truly structured people don't care about other people's opinions, criticisms, and questions, as long as they believe that their choices are right, as long as they have a strong enough belief and the ability to take responsibility for their own lives.
If someone doesn't like you, your counterattack will directly expose your true pattern.
And those who really have a big pattern often have a common feature, that is, to look at the outside world calmly and calmly be themselves.
One: The value of one person's existence is not to please another person
Mo Yan once said: No matter how good you are, there will be people who don't like you; no matter how bad you are, there will always be people who like you. Because whether it's good or not is one thing, whether you are liked or not is another matter.
People who really have a pattern understand that life is their own and have nothing to do with others.
Instead of disturbing your own pace by caring about the opinions of others, it is better to choose to block from the beginning. We can't influence other people's thoughts, we can't stop other people's behavior, all we can do is to do as much as possible within our own ability.
You have to know that the value of your existence is not to please anyone, there is no need to lose yourself because you care about others, this is not worth the loss, it is not cost-effective and unintelligent.
Second: people who really have a pattern will look at everything for a long time and will not be swayed by the outside world
The garbage on the first floor is also the scenery on the tenth floor, and the ancient Roman statesman Seneca said: If a person does not know which end he is going to sail to, then any wind is not a tailwind.
Throughout the ages, the path of countless successful people has been lonely.
Copernicus proposed the "heliocentric theory", which was judged heretical by the church; Magellan defended the "earth circle theory" and died on the way to verification. When Jack Ma created e-commerce, countless people laughed at his wishful thinking.
They were not recognized at the time, and time gave them the best answers.
The smallest difference between people is IQ, and the biggest difference is persistence.
Zhan Qingyun said that what made the Tang monks become Tang monks was not the scriptures, but the way to learn the scriptures. A lot of people have a chance to be great, but they give up halfway through. They are trapped in the evaluation of others, blocked in the "dislike" of ordinary people.
They changed direction because of other people's evaluations, and they made most people like him, but they also gave up their own lives that could have been brilliant.
The maturity of any heart must go through the baptism of loneliness and the tempering of loneliness, and others do not understand you, perhaps because they have not kept up with you.
Your dreams can only be realized by yourself.
You don't have to force yourself to meet most people's expectations, because they may not be on a plane. When you stand on the first floor, all you see is garbage, and when you stand on the tenth floor, you can only look out at the scenery. Those who scold you may have garbage on the first floor in their eyes.
The reason why a person is miserable and obsessed with the evaluation of others is because he does not have a height. The height is not enough, all you see are problems, the pattern is too small, and the entanglements are all trivial.
A person's evaluation of himself should be based on an objective basis, such as his own achievements, certificates, and projects, rather than based on the evaluation of others.
Subjective impressions are the most fickle and unreliable things, and if you evaluate yourself according to the subjective impressions of others, you will only lose your way and be at a loss.
You don't want others to like you and recognize you, as long as you have your own standards in your heart, then keep going. Those who did not give you glory and praise, time will give you.
Speaker Roy Martina once said, "One of the biggest breakthroughs in my life was that I stopped worrying about what other people thought of me. ”
Your life goes your own way, your success defines you. When you no longer need the approval of others, and no longer count the accusations of others, your life will have true freedom and meaning.
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