The once lively and peaceful life of a large family, after the change and change of time, gradually moved towards their own small families, most of the family is still there, but there is no longer the warmth and harmony of the past. People's hearts have moved, can no longer gather the beauty and long-term feelings of those years, the family portrait taken at that time is vague and cold, but it is the most precious memorial, and now it is no longer possible to take the family portrait that stays in the memory, maybe this is the most real way of life, there are gains and losses, and the beauty that cannot go back is more and more precious!
Many years ago, the big family's lively boiling and vivid fun, deep memory, can't help but be a little lost. Grandparents have four sons, two daughters, the memory has come, they have become a family, three aunts almost at the same time into the door, all from Sichuan, no bride price, even lack of decent wedding, the family is poor, can be so easy to marry the daughter-in-law, for the uncles, like pie in the sky; for the grandparents, suddenly add three daughters-in-law is really a great relief. The following year, in two or three months, two grandchildren and one granddaughter were added in succession, and they were overjoyed and blessed. So our big family was really lively and intimate in the nineties.
The relationship between the four concubines and the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law has not produced much contradiction or quarrel, and a little bump is inevitable, but it is also occasionally snickered behind the back, and the conversation is forgotten. In terms of right and wrong, everyone screws up, does not worry about gains and losses, of course, regional differences are still there, but a few aunts are still very reasonable, young they can bury their heads in the hard life, rest assured that they are in this side of the water and soil, it is a great luck, so grandparents do not participate in the construction of their own small days, self-responsibility for profit and loss, and do not appear eccentric.
At that time, agricultural work was the mainstay, and when it came to the season of sowing and harvesting, other people's homes lacked manpower, and our family was always a big gang of people, who could work and eat, and who were complete and sufficient. Whoever works in the house, cooks at whose house, and the heavy responsibility of cooking naturally falls on the shoulders of the grandmother, who is often ridiculed: when working, there is no one to see, and the table cannot sit down when eating. If you drink a little slower, when it comes to eating, you can only order soup to make rice. Everyone in the family can eat, a large pot of fat, a little slower, the soup may not be there, but also because the material is too scarce and the physical weight is heavy, and there is hunger. Usually visit the door to whose meal, see there is a delicious direct chopsticks, unceremonious, eat with pleasure and happiness. Now there is no such natural and foody, whether it is restraint or emotion, it seems reserved and unfamiliar.
Usually, the festivals and dinners are also all family moves, and Dad often says: Table legs can't be taken away, otherwise table legs will have to be carried together to eat! Dumplings, steamed steamed buns, markets, slaughtering pigs and sheep are all opportunities for dinner. Whose buns are delicious, whose sausages are spicy, whose meat is salty, etc., all clear. The rice in the next pot is fragrant, and I always think that the dishes fried by my aunts are delicious, because the spicy ones have a taste.
I miss the New Year and the New Year at that time. There are many people, and there is no mobile phone, and when they meet, they joke and chat, and the red envelopes that children ask for, a few pieces are not equal, but they are happy. From the first day of the first month of the first month, we began to discuss the order of which house to eat in the next few days, and during the period, we also had to pay homage to the New Year, and the time arrangement was appropriate. Often eating one family at noon, dinner is another family rushing, a large round table can not sit down, squeezed and squeezed, moved and moved, while eating and shouting, salty and light, urging vegetables and soup, the sound is complete, it is not lively. Haruka dim lights, simple houses, delicious dishes are scrambled, the dishes serving dishes are often quickly bottomed, stacked and stacked, where there is any Sven to eat, all immersed in the aroma of eating, fathers drink some wine, reminisce about the past and miss the reunion at this moment, grandparents are more pleased, children and grandchildren gathered together in joy.
Every year on the second day of the first lunar month, I want to go to the grandfather's house far away to visit the New Year, when the whole family goes out, gets up early and prepares to go, eats very little breakfast, only for the hearty belly at noon. It takes one or two hours to go by bicycle, and the wind and fire are on the road, singing and laughing all the way, looking forward to the future. When I arrived at my uncle's house, I often ate tea first: a large bowl of peeled boiled eggs, a bowl of red date sugar water, so that I miss eating eggs dipped in soy sauce at that time, special incense, two lower stomachs still feel that they are not enough to plug the gaps, but forced to throw chopsticks out for a walk twice. Lunch was very sumptuous and swallowed shamelessly, and by then we were used to being called: the wolf of the mountains. The reason is that we can eat against the mountains, the poor are hungry, they satirize them, we eat ours, once a year, the thunder does not move. After eating, the village leisurely swung around, and then hummed and rode back, so that it was not troublesome. Now even if you have a private car, you don't want to go out to visit the New Year anymore. The fourth grade then went to the aunt's house farther away, repeating the previous round of tossing.
Some time later, I went to my uncle's house, and it was my uncle who drove the tractor, and the open-top pulled the wind, and it was freezing cold, and everyone wanted to grab a sheltered position, and it was full of people in a car, and they set off in a big way. I remember once, a puppy in the family followed the half of the drive, and we sat on the tractor to chat hi, did not see the puppy at all, to return at night, I don't know who saw the poor puppy found halfway, very much like the family, stopped the car a call, immediately shook his head and tail to meet up, surprised to realize that it is really his own puppy, hugging the car, all kinds of heartache and emotion Ah, the first time I learned that the dog is also so humane! I miss the time when I was crowded on the tractor, warm and contented, even if my legs and feet were numb when I got off the car, even if the wind was cold and even rainy!
One day in the summer of 2004, when Grandpa died, I remember that it was the most complete together, even if it was a funeral, the family worked together to do a decent and orderly job! By this time, however, the aunt had become selfish and distant, and the family had not returned to the funeral. Grandpa's departure has also made this bigone gradually become thinner, perhaps materially rich, and people have also become lazy.
One afternoon in mid-2011, I suddenly received an unexpected phone call from my second uncle, when it was pouring rain, rushing home the next morning, people were no longer able to do it, surgery was no longer worthwhile, and finally there was only pain to give up, full of helplessness and regret, young, but so hasty, how many unfulfilled wishes he had, only to continue the frontier in the next life. During these years, the little uncle mistakenly entered the pyramid scheme, could not extricate himself, a family of three brought in, after a long time the little uncle was outside the real and false work, he experienced what no one knows, he does not say, we do not ask. Just affected his and his aunt's feelings, nearly twenty years of husband and wife feelings, can not withstand the increasingly indifferent heart, and finally only ended in divorce, aunt returned to Sichuan, never saw her again, really some miss her, like to chat with aunts and parents for a short time, maybe when they stayed, uncle and brother will not be a different life?
Now the days are flowing smoothly, the conditions have improved by heaven and earth, and the New Year will also get together, but the topics of their respective topics are less, the atmosphere is no longer intense, of course, they will not go to the grandfather or aunt's house to visit the New Year collectively, but to blame each other, and take turns every year. The guests are also to the point to eat, hula to eat, play mobile phones continue to play mobile phones, play cards to rush to the field, eat is only a form and thoughtful, not necessarily all-encompassing, door-to-door eating, where there is no shortage of this bite!
Usually, there are fewer gatherings, and only occasional guests are invited, and perhaps the fathers will drink more time with each other. Our generation is even more light as water, it is just a meeting in the New Year, usually there is no contact at all, meeting is also awkward chat, cousins and sisters can not be mentioned at all! More and more light, more and more narrow, this estrangement comes simply and crisply, without a trace of discussion, perhaps as a big sister, I have the obligation to warm up feelings, but the more strange and more confused, people's hearts are different, forgetting the initial kindness. It's not just our family, I think most of the people who have come here have this feeling, the taste of the year is getting weaker, the human touch is getting thinner and cooler, and the definition of relatives is becoming more and more narrow.
What is affection? The first thing that comes to mind is parents, wives and children, but I don't know that the seven aunts and eight aunts, uncles, etc. are also an important part of family affection, it is the strength and branches of their abundant blood, it is they who connect our lives, it is they who can stand up to protect this big family, and they have become a part of the strong backing. "Originally born from the same root", this root is implicated in the family we have become, growing and owning together impartially, because we are a family, a family that we have been all our lives, not only in the heart, but also in the eyes, mouth, and body, and are always imprinted in the blood.
I hope that our big family will still prosper for a long time, still lively, and still love each other!