1. There is a plump and beautiful young woman in the company, who has recently divorced. One weekend, the young woman actually asked me to watch a movie, and I thought that my peach blossoms had arrived, so I gladly agreed. The young woman bought two cups of milk tea and handed me one, and we sat in the lobby of the theater and waited, only to have a prickly young man come over and knock the milk tea she had placed on the table to the ground. The boy didn't seem to see it, and went straight out. She stood up straight up, rushed over and grabbed the guy.
The boy pushed her away and asked her what she was doing? She glared at the lad and said, You knocked my milk tea to the ground, didn't you see it? Are you blind? The young man took a look at the milk tea on the ground and said dismissively, wasn't it not spilled, it was all sealed. You just pick it up and you'll get it.
She said angrily, you knocked it to the ground, you have to apologize to me and help me pick it up. The young man scolded a nervous man and turned to leave. She actually jumped up directly, grabbed the young man's hair, and pressed him to the ground and beat him up, the young man was beaten up and screamed, and finally kept begging for forgiveness, and the young woman told him to compensate him for a hundred yuan, which made him go. I looked at a young woman in front of me, with a graceful figure and a delicate face, wearing a short hip skirt and queuing up. Standing next to her, Xiao Zhengtai was constantly arguing for the young woman to hold him, and the young woman had been silent, and then Xiao Zheng was too angry, and pulled the corner of the young woman's skirt with his hand and said: "Ma Ma If you don't pay attention to me again, I can pull your skirt!" At this time, a man next to him said: "The child can't get used to it, you don't hug him, see if he dares." "Stay, I thought this kind of woman can marry home?"
3. Recently, the sudden cooling, the iron egg has a cold, I wanted to resist the past, but I did not expect it to become more and more serious. There was no way, I had to go to the hospital for a drip, and the nurse kept shaking her hands when she put the needle. So Iron Egg asked her, "Old sister, you won't be a novice, will you?" The nurse said, "No." Iron Egg got angry when he heard it: "Not a novice, what are you shaking?" The nurse said aggrievedly: "I was too anxious to go out in the morning, and I forgot to wear autumn pants." "Iron Egg:"
4. Spent 30,000 yuan to buy a set of skin care products for the company's sister, and the sister agreed to go on a date with me. The two of us went to the playground to play, and when we arrived, the girl had to go to the haunted house to play, and we boldly chose the hellish haunted house. As a result, when I went in, I regretted it, and I was frightened and screamed. Halfway through, a ghost came out from behind the crowd and chased us all the way. The girl couldn't bear it, she took the ghost's hand and asked, "How much money do you spend a month, so hard?" "The ghost was stunned at first, then turned around and left!?"
5. I was chopping millet spicy in the kitchen, preparing to make homemade chopped peppers, my husband was in the living room, talking to me about work, and I coped with him a few words. The husband said a little dissatisfied: Hey, hey, I talk to you, can you be a little more enthusiastic and hot? So angry that I put down the kitchen knife and slapped him in the face with the hand that had just taken the pepper: How? Passionate enough, hot enough, right?
6. On this day, the abbot and the master next door went to the five-star hotel for a blind date. The abbot said before the meal: Declare in advance that this meal AA. The two spent more than 8,000 yuan to eat, the abbot felt very distressed, and Shi Tai took the initiative to close more than 8,000 yuan, and never contacted again. The abbot called and asked, "Why didn't you contact me?" Shi Tai smiled slightly and said: How can a woman who has been spoiled by a lion look at a wild dog?
7. Today I went to the park with my wife to hang out, and I walked to see an old couple, the old man in a wheelchair, and the old woman pushing. The two talked and laughed, and the old man turned around and patted the old lady's hand, which was very intimate. So I remembered the song, "The most romantic thing I can think of is to grow old with you", and said to the daughter-in-law next to me: Do you say that we will be like them? Daughter-in-law: You also want to use a wheelchair?
8. Recently, the familiar music can no longer be heard near the neighborhood, and the aunts have stopped dancing square dance. I was very curious, so I went to the square to see what was going on. It turned out that a group of square dancing aunts were chasing a small fart. Curious, I asked, "Why don't you dance and chase him?" A big aunt said breathlessly, "I can't jump." For three days, I didn't know where such a child came from, wearing a red belly pocket, taking a small stick, and as soon as we jumped, he shouted: 'Children practice!' ”
9. Alipay rose viciously to 2,000 yuan, and immediately married a Nike store to buy shoes. I bought a pair of canvas shoes that were comfortable to try on in the store. After taking it home and wearing it for a morning, I always felt panicking about the soles of my feet, and I went to change my shoes in the afternoon. The boss took the shoes and looked at them carefully for half a day, said no change with a brutal attitude, turned around and took a pair of pliers out of a toolbox. As soon as I saw that this was going to be a fight, I took a few steps back in fright. The boss stared at me and picked up the pliers and pulled a screw from the sole.
#Funny##Funny paragraph# #年度搞笑名场面 #