Suppressors often tell the suppressed, "You always think you're right," and they try to make them abandon their views by doing so.
If someone reverses shaping his personality and finds that everything he does is wrong, how does that affect his personality?
For a person who is too controlling, finding that doing anything wrong means that the self they have created is wrong: it's an experience that shatters the personality.
While the suppressor struggles with his fear of wrong, the controlled person instead wonders if he has done something wrong. Some women have been taught countless times that there are many practices that are wrong.
It's wrong to talk back, it's wrong to protest, it's wrong to pursue a career, it's wrong to express your opinion...
This information can make a person feel paralyzed, unable to act, or at least unable to act without permission.
Correctness is undoubtedly important to anyone who wants to fix another person through imaginary man, because in this case correctness reduces the tendency to be independent. Correctness affirms the establishment of a connection between only one thought and one point of view.
A man explained to us how he tried his best to get his wife to give up her world:
Even though I know I'm wrong — yes, sometimes I do know, but I deny it — it's important that I look a little better than my wife. I need to win anyway, and I want my wife's support, which is exactly why I want her thinking to be in line with mine. If she didn't think like me, I wouldn't support her, which explains why correctness and victory are so crucial.
When the prospects for victory are very bleak, I will insult uncontrollably and get angry at will, and I think it is that I am attacking with all my might in the hope of winning. When I lose control of myself, she will do her best to end the episode, admitting that she was wrong even if she wasn't wrong. After I trap her, I will walk away from the side.
It's very interesting that the meanings of "trapping her" and "fixing her" are quite close.
Of course, at any time, controllers may face fear, but they find that as long as they have the courage to accept their spouse's different points of view, they find that they will not disappear. After going through the experience of "not going away," they build an inner connection. When this inner connection begins to develop, it becomes possible to break the illusion.
——Excerpt from Don't Control Me with Love (Patrice. Evans/Author) (United States)
After reading through 40 books, you may also be able to break away from trivial daily life and transform into a different version of yourself:
After reading through 3 books, you will jump out of the previous comfort zone, no longer limited to the past thinking misunderstandings, and the angle of gossip can be different;
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Read through 20 books, you will exceed the cognitive level of your peers, your boss asks you for your point of view, you can often point out the essence of the problem, raise children, you know the method better than others;
After reading through 40 books, you will be rich in heart, gentle and firm, and become a high-quality woman with high emotional intelligence in the eyes of others.
After all, a woman's greatest sense of security is not birth, not marriage, but the book of poetry that others can't take away, only belongs to your heart.
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Talk about marital love feelings: "How to avoid being controlled in the relationship", "What is the family management method of a senior woman"
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Read through 40 good books and be a quality woman who is not afraid of the old
Women who read and do not read live a different life:
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