Masson's View of the World: The Road to a Strong Country Starts from the Details (5) The Necessity of Introducing Bottom Limit Thinking into the Classroom (2)
(This article continues the previous article, the total word count is more than 2800 words, about 15 minutes after reading)
Developing limit thinking rules helps to deal fairly with bullying in schools to prevent violence in schools
Now that almost everyone is transparent and alive, running naked in the corners of society, there is no privacy to speak of, especially in schools, the composition of the family, the professional work of parents, the political outlook of parents and other aspects, are placed in the school, teachers will inevitably be based on the background of students and family background.
The powerful easily get the care of the teacher and indulge the child's wantonness; the backgroundless are often ignored by the teacher and fade away from the child's cultivation.
So many times we learn to worship the teacher because there is no background, and the teacher will treat some children because they may have to rely on it.
When the child's family door, the teacher knows it well, bullying behavior occurs between students, it is easy to fall into irrational bias mediation, disputes are not only not well resolved, but also easy to intensify contradictions.
On May 10, 2019, Wang Moujian, the parent of He X, a student of Shangrao No. 5 Primary School, entered the classroom through the back door, stabbed his daughter's male counterpart Liu Mouchen more than 10 times, and then lifted the boy up and threw him in the corridor, and when he was sent to the hospital, he died after rescue was ineffective.
It is said that the daughter He Moujian once told her father Wang Moujian that her tablemate Liu Mouchen bullied her every day, and after repeated communication between Wang Moujian and Liu Mouchen's parents without results, he ended the boy's life in anger.
Why can the quarrel and bullying between children fall into such a tragic end?
It was reported that the boy's parents were doctors, and other parents and even teachers in the class often turned to the boy's parents. The girl's father was unemployed and idle at home. The difference in family lineage has led to people around them almost all turning to boys in dealing with the incident of boy Liu Mouchen bullying the girl He X, so that the problem of the girl He X being bullied by the boy Liu X Chen every day has not been completely resolved after many times of communication and coordination.
Seeing that his daughter was still being bullied, his father Wang Moujian was powerless to solve it, feeling unfair but helpless, Wang Moujian, who was full of despair, chose to kill the boy Liu Mouchen, and then sat at the scene of the crime and waited for the arrival of public security personnel. In the end, the girl's father, Wang Moujian, was sentenced to execution according to law.
If a person loses hope, death may be the best fulfillment.
What was originally an ordinary bullying dispute between two children, because there was no just rule to resolve, eventually evolved into a heart-wrenching tragedy of the loss of two living lives.
Digging deeper into the root cause is the result of the lack of corresponding preventive punishment rules. If Shangrao Five Primary School has the following rules for thinking education:
1. When the behavior of a classmate makes you feel uncomfortable, you should immediately realize that the other party has begun to bully you (at this time, you need to show your own bottom principle, and you can't keep silent, because silence will lead to the other party thinking that you are timid and cowardly, and you will become more and more bullying you in the future). You solemnly warn him: I am very angry, you have made me very sad, if you continue, I will tell the teacher immediately!
2. When a classmate bullies you for the second time, you warn him loudly and tell the teacher at the same time, and the teacher arranges for him to apologize to you in person and make verbal promises. (At this stage, the teacher needs to consider whether to change seats according to the situation, and transfer the two children to a distance)
3. When a classmate bullies you for the third time, you warn him at the same time and immediately tell the teacher. After the teacher taught him, he asked him to write a review, a letter of guarantee and apologize to you in person, and the teacher changed seats, allowing the two children to separate a certain distance and reduce the close contact between the two. (At this stage, the teacher needs to inform the other parent, if there is a next time, he will change the child's class)
4. When a classmate bullies you for the fourth time, after you warn him, immediately tell the teacher that the teacher should promptly notify the other parent to come to school, change classes, and let the beater and his parents make a written review and written guarantee in front of the students in the two classes. The review and guarantee of the beater is not less than 1200 words, which contains the cause of the matter, the process, the fault of self-knowledge, and how to change it in the future. The parents of the hitter have a written review and written assurances of not less than 2,000 words. It contains the cause of the matter, the process, the mistakes of self-discipline of the child and how to educate in the future (at this time, there may be parents not cooperating, then the teacher will report this situation to the principal, and the school will order a decision to withdraw from school)
5. When a classmate bullies you for the fifth time, you immediately tell the teacher, and the teacher asks the school to contact the parents and public security departments of both sides. The beater and his parents made a written review and written assurances in person at the all-school teacher-student meeting, and after obtaining forgiveness, the public security department took them into custody and detention for 15 days to 12 months. (At this stage, once the beater and his parents do not cooperate, the school will handle the withdrawal from the school and contact the superior education supervisor at the same time, and the public security department will directly handle the punishment of 6 months to 24 months of detention)
6. When a classmate bullies you for the sixth time, the public security organ can directly sentence you to a criminal penalty of 1 to 5 years in prison. (The sixth punishment is usually rarely violated by the student, and once the third or fourth punishment occurs, it is already very serious.)
(The above punishment rules are only for reference, and the specific needs to be uniformly formulated by local schools)
With the prevention of the above rules, the tragedy of two lives can be completely avoided.
When the girl He Moumou was bullied for the first time, she would warn her tablemate Liu Mouchen according to the rules of bottom limit thinking;
When the girl He Moumou was bullied for the second time, Liu Mouchen had to be taught by the teacher and wrote a review letter to her and apologized personally, and the teacher may change seats for both sides according to the rules. At this time, the boy Liu Mouchen has no possibility of quarreling at close range. At the same time, he has made a written review and assurance to the girl He Moumou that the promises he himself has made will be kept. There is also the possibility that if he bullies the lesbian table again, he may face a more severe punishment of the third or even fourth article, and the increasingly severe punishment rules will allow him to control his behavior.
When the girl He Moumou was still bullied for the third time, the boy had to write a review letter and a letter of guarantee, and the teacher had to notify his parents and change classes.
At this time, the boy Liu Mouchen's psychological pressure will become more and more, feel more and more trouble, on the one hand, he has to write a review and guarantee, but also to explain to his parents, criticized by the teacher, but also to transfer him to other classes, but to other classes also need to let parents come forward to find other class teachers to communicate and receive, such a series of troubles will make boys consider restraining their behavior and prevent the occurrence of the fourth punishment.
According to such punishment rules, the five small tragedies in Shangrao City will not have the result of the death of two lives, because through the rules of scientific punishment, the possibility of solving the bullying incident in an extreme way has been eliminated from the root.
Many times when children are bullied in school, they do not realize that the other party's behavior has touched their own personal limit, and they do not understand how to resist the behavior of pressing the bottom limit. Timid children are easily caught up in the patience and humiliation of not fighting back and scolding and not returning the mouth.
Children are constantly beaten and bullied, in the school environment will feel weak and afraid, over time, children will form a timid and lonely inferiority complex, and even when they finally can't stand it, they will have extreme psychological tendencies.
At this time, the child's heart is confused, not knowing who can help her?
When the child is really unbearable to tell the parents, this bullying usually lasts for a long time.
It is the duty of parents to raise their children to grow up, and it is their nature to keep their children safe.
When parents hear that other classmates often bully their children, their mood must be angry and angry. When you find a school teacher and the other parent to solve the problem, if you can't get a good mediation, it is easy to split the anger in your heart and make radical and reckless behavior.
Today's teachers are busy with a lot of things such as preparing lessons, coping with inspections and superior assessments every day, and then busy dealing with quarrels and disputes between students and dealing with parents on both sides, it is easy to have unfair situations. A little carelessness ended up being a thankless result that both parents complained about.
When the school has formulated the bottom limit thinking rule, the bullied students only need to reflect to the teacher according to the above terms. The teacher can implement it according to the rules, so as to quickly maintain that the child will not continue to be bullied, ensure the fairness and justice of the results, and prevent the subjective bias of the teacher.
At the same time, the bottom-line thinking rule lets children understand how to deal with themselves when they are bullied. Both sides of the bullying incident are a kind of protection, and the strong children are no longer willful and arrogant through the strict discipline of these rules; the weak children have the protection of these rules without being too cowardly and timid, and learn how to fight.
A good rule makes a bad person better; a bad rule can make a bad person worse, and a good person can be bad.
Through fair management rules, in-depth and continuous cultivation of children's bottom limit behavior, slowly let children have a clear bottom limit thinking understanding, clear how to maintain their own no longer be bullied, to help children in later life their rights and interests are not violated.