She has melted into the endless expanse

【Literary Past】

Xing Xiuling

"Man is an eternal word, nailed into this endless vastness." This is a poem that the poet Fu Tianlin occasionally received after climbing the Zhuoer Peak of Qilian Mountain. Just two years later, she also integrated into this "endless wilderness".

On October 23, 2021, a poetry star in The Mountain City fell! Countless white flowers, flying tears and rain, and overwhelming eulogies are sending off an ordinary and noble poet.

I stood in the hall of condolences, staring at her graceful image, bowing deeply. The screen broadcast her 76 years of life course: from a naïve little girl with double braids to a young girl in Jinyun mountain farm; from a peasant worker who wrote a radio manuscript to an "orchard poet" who sang green notes; from her debut work to the "Poetry Journal", to participating in the National Poets Maritime Visiting Group, being ordered and taught by Ai Qing, Bai Birch, Yan Chen and others; from the first poetry collection winning the first National Outstanding New Poetry (Poetry Collection) Award, to winning the laurel of the Fifth Lu Xun Literature Award. This picture of flickering light and darkness outlines the trajectory of her hard and abundant life, and a pile of past events is like a movie lens, far and near, hazy and clear in front of my eyes...

It was an autumn day in the early 1990s, and she and I met each other by chance, but we hit it off, sitting on the couch in my house, unrestrained, and talking on our knees. We are not at all like the first meeting, talking about the past, talking about the future, thesis, telling family history, talking about notre dame cathedral, Cologne Cathedral, red strawberries on the Rhine, flowers in the Alps that she saw during her visit... Indeed, we have a lot in common: unfortunate childhood, starving youth, loving husbands are from Yingshan in northern Sichuan, children and daughters, all like flowers and plaid clothes... The difference is that she has more experience than me and has suffered much more than I have. I was two years older, but I had never smelled the fragrance of an orchard, I had never picked a heavy bucket of dung, of course, I had never been abroad, and I did not have such fruitful creative achievements as her. In the presence of this "orchard poet" who already had four books of poetry at the time, I was certainly insignificant. However, there was sincerity, kindness, humility, and even "teacher" in her eyes, and after my fierce opposition, we were called sisters.

Since then, we have begun a friendship that lasted for thirty years: participating in various literary activities in Chongqing, collecting styles in districts and counties together, and organizing "Salons for Women Writers" together... From Chonggong Town to Black Valley, from Aoki Pass to Zouma Town, from Golden Orchard to North Hot Spring, every time they walk together, they have left precious memories. One of the most memorable events was the mid-1990s when we were invited to Ziyang, Sichuan Province, to interview, and in order not to delay our work, we took the evening train and arrived in Ziyang late at night, and we had to stay at her Qigu's house that night.

We interviewed a state-owned company that produces hard hats and tooling, and the photo album still holds a group photo of the two of us wearing helmets. The noise in the workshop was very high in decibels and the dust was high, but we interviewed very carefully and obtained a lot of material. When she returned, she wrote the first half of a reportage overnight on the eve of a busy trip abroad, and I followed closely behind and wrote the second half. Subsequently, the long article signed "Tian Xiu" was published in the newspaper and received a considerable amount of money. Since she was visiting abroad at the time, I have not used it. Suddenly, news came that a private entrepreneur whom we met in Ziyang had been hit by a fire and suffered heavy losses. Impulsively, without consulting Tianlin, I immediately donated all this money and recorded it in her name. After Tianlin returned to China, she immediately called me: "You are doing the right thing, I completely agree!" But when she said that she had only spent 400 shillings (equivalent to 60 yuan) to buy a pair of cloth shoes during her visit to Vienna, I was a little remorseful of her "kidnapping" and that she did not have enough money.

After she won the Lu Xun Literature Award, the Chongqing "Women Writers Salon" took the lead in holding a tea party, where 20 sisters gathered to recite her poems and share her honors and successes. She took out 5,000 yuan from the prize money and donated it to the "Women Writers Salon" as a fund for the event, which made me, the host, very uneasy.

In August 2019, we came to Wulong with the same car to participate in the PEN conference. When she saw Han Xiaohui from Beijing, she was overjoyed and flew forward to hug her. More than 20 years ago, they won the first Chinese Women's Literature Award together. Xiao Hui is also my friend, along the way, the three of us are intimate, strolling in the layered tea mountains, wandering on the undulating Prince Lake, tasting tea in the elegant and quaint tea museum, trekking on the steep And steep Chuanqian Ancient Road... Tianlin walked vigorously and laughed heartily, which made Me and Xiaohui envious!

Who could have predicted that, just two years apart, she would leave in a hurry. A brilliant scenery in Chongqing's literary circles has disappeared, leaving us with too much regret, too many regrets, and too many thoughts! Tianlin once told me before she died that her mother used to say a sentence: "Our home is in heaven, and when we go to earth, we are doomed to suffer..." Now, she has gone to heaven to reunite with her mother! As the portrait on either side of the bracelet said: "Once a boundless time ended gracefully; after a journey of thousands of purples and thousands of reds, it arrived quietly." This is also the last verse she left on earth.

Guangming Daily (15th edition, November 26, 2021)

Source: Guangming Network - Guangming Daily