"I wish my parents did this..." Listen to your child.'

"When I do something wrong, I hope my mother will listen to my heart first, instead of directly angering..."

"I don't want my parents to have me in their eyes, I want to have a little more of their own shadow there."

What does the ideal parent look like in the eyes of your child? Let's listen to the children's hearts.

Not to mention the study of "fatherly kindness and filial piety", but to learn "chicken flying dog jumping"

Ms. Wang and her wife, who live in Zhengzhou's Zhengdong New District, were recently called to a "meeting" by their daughter Lele.

Le Le sat in the living room, signaled his parents to sit down, and said: "I know my goal, I also have my own learning rhythm, as soon as I get home, can you two stop chasing me and asking this and that?" ”

Indeed, Lele entered junior high school this year, and his grades were still good when he entered the school, and recently because he did not have monthly examinations and homework, he returned home to read books and play games.

Ms. Wang watched her daughter so "relaxed", always felt that her heart was bottomless, and could not help but nag a few words.

"Lele, have you learned everything in your class?"

"Finished your homework today, right?"

……

As everyone knows, such nagging sounds particularly "harsh" to children, so there is the opening "family meeting".

Be the parent of your child's hope

Children in adolescence, facing the implementation of double subtraction, how should parents get along with their children?

Cheng Qian, the host of the Chinese School outside Zhengdong New District in Zhengzhou City and the famous class teacher studio in Henan Province, recently conducted a survey among seventh-grade students called "I really hope my parents do this."

The child's answer is thought-provoking.

The children's answer was yes

"I hope my parents will listen to me."

"I hope my parents will force me when I can't hold on."

"I hope that my parents can control their emotions and not get angry at me as soon as they encounter something unpleasant!"

"I hope that my mother can actively cooperate with the teacher's notice and don't let the teacher always urge."

Has your child ever said anything similar to you?

And have you ever interrupted them?

If the answer is yes, then your parent-child relationship may require the following four "weapons".

Equip four "weapons" and be a good parent

"Your child didn't tell you that he wanted you to do the four things?" Cheng Qian said that in fact, many parents do not know that parents who meet the following four standards are good parents in the eyes of their children.

You may wish to make a comparison with yourself.

First, the desire for companionship.

After all, the child is weak, and he actually needs you more than you seem.

Second, focus on privacy.

Respect is a bridge of communication between people.

Third, want to communicate.

This society does not need patriarchy. You respect the child, respect his feelings and thoughts, and he will open up to you.

Fourth, emotional stability.

The essence of education is to convey the right values, not emotions.

If you are emotionally unstable, don't have intense verbal communication with your child.

If your child is emotionally unstable, avoid intense verbal communication.

Cheng Qian said that if you want your child to manage emotions maturely, you must first act maturely.

When you do this, I believe you will receive a warm answer from your own child.

For example, in Cheng Qian's survey, many children brought out by excellent parents answered very warmly:

"I hope my mother can buy herself some skin care products such as essences and creams, I am in my 50s and have not used really good cosmetics a few times."

"I hope my mother can sleep more at night, when I was a child, she didn't sleep well to take care of me, and now that I'm older, I hope my mother will take more care of herself and sleep more..."

In the era of double subtraction, if parents can communicate "weapons" in advance, I believe that they will be able to harvest a warm family atmosphere and a harmonious parent-child relationship.

Source: Department of Education of Henan Province