If you ask a single girl why she is single, you will most likely get an answer like this:
"I'm not good looking, I'm not in good shape, who would like me?"
"The last relationship hurt me so much that I don't feel the strength to love again"
"After watching a lot of social news, I think it's dangerous to fall in love, or it's safe for paper people"
"A person is also very good, earn their own money to spend, what do you want to do, do not have to accommodate others, why find someone to add to their own blockage"
They are all envious of the love of others on the Internet, while sucking lemons and longing for love, but when the real encounter comes, they regard it as a flood beast and avoid it.
Why would anyone crave intimacy while fearing it?
Sociologist Brene Brown has found after 6 years of research that one of the core of anxiety, avoidance, and fear in relationships is shame.
This sense of shame usually manifests itself as if there is something about me that someone else would have known or seen and would have thought I was not worth associating with.
Of course, this is a normal phenomenon, and if a person does not have a sense of shame, then he does not have all the sympathy or relationship of a human being.
But the key to preventing some people from entering and enjoying intimate relationships is whether they think they deserve to be loved and whether they have the courage to accept that they are not perfect.
Shame makes us afraid of being seen and judged, but entering a relationship means we have to allow ourselves to be truly seen.
Having the courage to accept yourself, to acknowledge your imperfections and vulnerabilities, and to accept the risks and hurts that may arise after entering an intimate relationship is a long and painful process. More people choose to avoid and repress than to change. Reality gives us enough reasons and conditions to escape, but perhaps only we know whether we want someone to accompany us when we are isolated and depressed.
To help you face confusion and anxiety in intimate relationships, we developed this test. Based on the "Young Bad Schema Model", the 9 most influential models of intimacy are extracted, which takes you to find the "mysterious power" that affects intimate relationships and helps you get the emotional life you yearn for.
Measure your relationship patterns and how do they affect intimacy?
Suitable for being in or want to enter a relationship,
People who have doubts about intimacy
Helps you gain a deep understanding of the personality factors that influence intimate relationships
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