Author: Insight Jenny
Middle-aged people are the most cruel to themselves.
01
Just past Labor Day, a strange name on Weibo hot search: Mao Junhua.
The 41-year-old assistant to the president of Ant Financial died of illness on May 1.
His friends sent out condolences and lamented the envy of talent.
Mao Junhua graduated from Tsinghua University in 2002, joined CICC in 2003 as a managing director of the research department of China International Capital Corporation Limited, and joined Ant Financial in 2016 as head of investor relations.
During CICC's 13 years, he was a star analyst.
In the eyes of all colleagues and friends, Mao Junhua's achievements are hard to spell.
At CICC, everyone had to leave work at 10 p.m., but he came to the company to continue working overtime.
His diligence makes colleagues feel stressed:
"I think when I just joined CICC, every time you left the company in the middle of the night, you were there, making me think that even star analysts are so desperate, what reason do we have not to work hard?"
Later, Mao Junhua joined Ant Financial, and Huang Hao, the former president of the Online Commercial Bank, once jokingly ridiculed him:
"You are all in the gold MD (managing director), come to us as a code farmer?"
He replied with a smile: "I have watched others fight in the first half of my life, and I want to try my own taste of fighting in the second half of my life." ”
Mao Junhua did regard work as a "war", often working until two o'clock in the morning in Ant Financial.
Even if he was later diagnosed with lymphoma and took a year's long vacation, he could not stay idle, but the circle of friends was still the comments of the financial circle and the promotion of the company's business, and few people knew that he was sick.
From Tsinghua Xueba to the best analyst of CICC to the executive of Ant Financial, Mao Junhua has always been an enviable winner in life, and has beautifully fought a hard battle.
41 years old, is the most golden age in a person's career, but suddenly died, it is inevitable that the world will regret.
02
Friends around us often lament that when we are healthy, we are unscrupulous and never believe that life is actually vulnerable.
Some time ago, I saw a confession book of tens of thousands of words on the Internet, and I felt a lot of emotions.
The protagonist of the story, Yu Yiyi, started a business for the second time at the age of 40, experienced the ups and downs of his career, and has been accelerating in recent years.
Working overtime every day, my temper is getting more and more grumpy, and I know that my heart is wrong, but the work is like a wheel war, and I can't stop at all.
In order to achieve a breakthrough in his life before the age of 40, he missed the opportunity to go to the hospital several times in succession, until he was sent to the ICU by his relatives and suddenly realized.
He escaped death and wrote down a painful understanding:
If you are uncomfortable, go to the hospital immediately, and do not delay.
Quit smoking and don't stay up late.
If you don't succeed at 40, don't push yourself.
These seemingly simple truths are lessons that many people can learn with their lives.
I remembered that a doctor friend once complained to me that he did not like to treat middle-aged people the most.
Young people have a good foundation, and old people are obedient enough.
Only middle-aged people, obviously their bodies have collapsed, but they do not listen to persuasion, and they always feel that they are very resistant.
Every time middle-aged people are advised to pay attention to rest, the reply is always "I have to earn money.".
Friends smiled bitterly, and in the end, they were busy making money for the hospital.
I don't know since when, exchanging life for money has become the fate of middle-aged people.
On the one hand is the sense of crisis in life. On the other hand is ambition.
When people reach middle age, they are often the most cruel to themselves.
Writer Li Bihua once said:
"Life is only seventy, except for ten years of ignorance, ten years of old and weak, only fifty left." Of those fifty, there were days and nights, and only twenty-five remained. In the event of wind and rain, illness, danger, running from place to place, how many good days are left? ”
Illness is a "fine" for a person's overdraft, and it is also waking up middle-aged people who are obsessed.
03
If there's one thing in the world that can make you lose everything overnight, it's 80% sick.
In August last year, Mr. You, a U.S.-funded logistics company in Xiamen, was on the hot search.
Mr. You was a key account manager for a logistics company for 24 years.
Three years ago, he was diagnosed with liver cancer.
During the two-year treatment period, he spent all his savings and owed foreign debts.
To make matters worse, his salary suffered a "cliff-like decline" during this period, with his monthly salary falling from 25,000 to 1,200, and he also had to pay more than 3,000 medical insurance.
The world is cruel, you lose your health, you lose value.
Once read the story of a female reader asking for help.
Her husband is a middle-level manager of a company, and it is often said that men can focus on their careers, and big things and small things have to make way for their careers.
In order to fight for performance, the highest record is not to sleep for a week. In order to grab more orders, he can accompany customers to drink until dawn.
As long as there is a job, the body is no longer uncomfortable to resist, he often has a cold and fever, but always feel that it is a small problem, take a medicine will be fine.
Also because of his hard work, the 35-year-old has small achievements, a house and a car, and basically financial freedom.
Three years ago, he suddenly collapsed in the office and colleagues took him to the hospital.
He had never set foot in a hospital, and he did not expect to be diagnosed with advanced leukemia for the first time.
After entering the hospital, I learned that "financial freedom" is a lie.
His illness, his wife has to work to earn money, elderly parents to take care of, can not stay up are both sick, the original plan of the child to study abroad, hard to be delayed.
......
The happiness and achievement of a family is so vulnerable in the face of illness.
Someone once compared work, family and health to three balls, only work is made of erasers, falling down will bounce up, and family and health are made of glass, once broken, can no longer be repaired.
But people are like this, until they regret it, they will not learn to cherish it.
04
How much do we have to pay to recognize the meaning of living well?
Japanese hospice nurse Shuichi Otsu wrote a book, "25 Things I Regret Before I Die," after listening to the last words of 1,000 patients.
Different from what we imagined, it turned out that in the face of death, what people regretted was not that they did not do a good job, not that the company failed to go public, and that their income did not exceed one million, but:
Didn't go anywhere I wanted to go
Didn't meet with the people you wanted to meet
Didn't enjoy the food
No "thank you" to someone you love deeply
Didn't do what I wanted to do
Most of the time is spent working
Failed to talk about a love that will last forever
Never married in a lifetime
No attention is paid to good health
No smoking cessation
Shuichi Otsu wants to tell more people that at the end of life, he will find that there are so many things that have not been done and so many reluctances.
The things you once exchanged your life for, in the face of life and death, are worthless.
And those that you desperately ignore for the sake of work are truly worth cherishing.
Those who have been hollowed out by the disease originally had a lot of time to experience the excitement of life, to spend with their families and children. However, without health, everything becomes empty talk.
There's been a hot topic on the Internet: At what moment do you feel really hopeless?
Many people's answers are related to illness.
"At the age of 27, diagnosed with cancer, or malignant tumor, my mother was crying in the hallway."
"A person in Beijing, sick and hospitalized, did not dare to tell his parents."
"I just had an operation and I couldn't sleep all night in pain."
"My husband worked overtime and stayed up late and was taken to the hospital, but the children at home were not taken care of..."
Zweig said: "When a person is young, he always thinks that the gods of sickness and death will only patronize others." ”
It wasn't until the health was exhausted that death was not far away.
▽
We stayed up the longest night, wearing the most expensive masks.
We served hot tea with goji berries during the day, but at night we pushed the cups at the wine table to change cups.
We always have so many excuses not to take good care of the body.
Life is not easy, so we must do our best.
And when you cut through the thorns, the bottom card of life must be firmly held in your hand.
At the age of the old and the young, a middle-aged man falls, which is the collapse of a family.
So it's important to remember that you're not just the mainstay of the company, you're the backbone of your family.
Encourage all middle-aged people.