In life, each of us will encounter stressful events that cause anxiety, for these anxieties we sometimes have no way to deal with well, we will use some methods of distorting reality to deal with, for anxiety this way of dealing with and coping methods are called self-defense mechanism, everyone's defense mechanism is different, the famous psychologist Floynder divided it into eight categories, I will share today what ❓ the eight categories are
First, repression
We will suppress the events that cause our anxiety, lurk in our consciousness as if they did not happen, and then continue to maintain a normal life, but it is only suppressed, not gone
For example: when we are hurt in a relationship, we will instinctively hide this part, not to talk to outsiders, every day is still normal life, as if it has not happened, but in fact, this is only suppressed by you in the depths of the heart, it has not disappeared, may come out again in the middle of the night, reminding you, making you think again.
Second, denial
We deny things that trigger negative feelings such as anxiety and guilt to cover up and protect ourselves. For example, if we say something hurtful to each other in a relationship, or do something bad, when you bring it up again, you may say no, I don't remember I said so, you exaggerated it, etc. to deny that I have said that I have done some bad things, to protect myself and prove that I am not that kind of person.
Third, reverse formation
This means that we often exhibit emotions and behaviors that are inconsistent with common sense. For example, someone in the family has died, but the father pretends to be calm and indifferently deals with many things, which is inconsistent with common sense feelings, the father is just pretending to be strong, and does not want everyone to see his vulnerability.
Fourth, regress
It refers to escaping reality by allowing ourselves to retreat to the happy times of early life because we encounter some setbacks or difficult things in real life. For example, there are now some college students whose purpose is not just to improve their studies, but to face the pressure of social employment and the cruelty of the real society, so they retreat to the carefree study time of the school to escape the cruelty of society.
5. Rationalization
We will reinterpret the things that cause us anxiety to make him seem more receptive. For example, many people now call themselves social fears, which are used to explain their relatively lonely behavior and do not interact with others, to cover up their inner insecurity. But in fact, he is just afraid of interacting with people, afraid of being hurt, afraid of others seeing his vulnerable side, which is a protective explanation. For example, when someone cuts in line, we don't go up to argue with him, find a reason for ourselves that it is because this person is not qualified, I don't bother with him to cover up, in fact, I just don't dare to argue, not courageous enough.
6. Transfer
We will transfer the event or emotion that causes our anxiety to someone else to make ourselves feel more comfortable. For example, in the company was wronged, but did not have the courage to fight back, with a ball of anger in the heart, after returning home, began to provoke the husband and children, back home to know to play games, did not see the room so messy? Don't know how to write homework, didn't you see your mother work so hard a day? By transferring this bad emotion to others to give myself a short comfort, see that I am not so useless, I still have control at home.
7. Sublimation
Sublimation is when you grow up and turn what you don't allow into behavior that society approves. For example, if you are particularly jealous of others, look beautiful and have money, you will guess in the back that there must be a rich boyfriend or how, but growth is that you do not have to look at others with colored eyes, are willing to walk into others, and let go of your jealousy, willing to learn from others, this is the growth sublimation.
VIII. Projection
Projection is when you think that other people think the same way you think. For example, if you are in a bad mood today, low energy, angry, you feel that others also look at you unfavorably, others may just accidentally walk and bump into you, you think he must be deliberate, but when you are in a good mood today, you feel that everyone is smiling at you, and the flowers are much more gorgeous than ever, a bit like the law of attraction.
For example, you are a cautious, suspicious person, you will also think that the other party is also such a person, you send messages to others others have not replied, you will think that the other party must be angry because of yesterday's events, so deliberately do not reply to my message, you will project your sensitivity and paranoia onto others, think that others are also sensitive and suspicious, in fact, just because others are busy and have not seen.
This is the defense mechanism shared today, but which one do you use most often? Leave a message and share it with me.