Successful marriages, there is no reason not to be a good match
Text/Jiang Xiao (Guizhou)
In real life, people often point fingers at other people's marriages. The difference in temperament and appearance of each couple, the disparity in family economic conditions, the size of age, and the difference in cultural quality... It will become the topic of people's gossip after tea and dinner. In fact, a successful marriage, there is no reason not to be unworthy. Every seemingly unworthy but very successful marriage is an impregnable castle.
One
There is a saying in the "Augmented Sage Text": horses often drive idiots and go, and clever wives often sleep with their clumsy husbands. Regarding the marriage of husband and wife who are not matched in appearance but are happy and happy, there are countless chinese and foreign marriages in ancient and modern times. The names of the Three Kingdoms
Zhuge Liang's "eight feet long and great appearance" is, in today's words: tall and dignified. In addition, he is knowledgeable and has a good personality, which is simply the "diamond king old fifth". He made a very special friend named Huang Chengyan. He admired Zhuge Liang's character and knowledge. One day he suddenly said to Zhuge Liang, I have an ugly daughter with yellow hair and a black face, but her talent is compatible with yours. After hearing this, Zhuge Liang actually agreed to this marriage. Huang Chengyan's daughter, named "Huang Yueying", was later commonly known as "Huang A ugly". Zhuge Liang's choice of an ugly woman as his wife was not only rumored to be a joke at the time, but also has been talked about by future generations to this day. However, for Zhuge Liang, the ugly-looking Huang Yueying is not only a political assistant with both ability and political integrity, but also an excellent woman who is gentle and virtuous, and their married life is happy. During the Song Dynasty, Su Xiaomei, who "last year's two tears of acacia, which has not yet flowed to the cheeks", actually wanted to marry a charming Qin Shaoyou, and QinSe and Mingfu sang women with happiness for a lifetime, and the reason for their companionship was to appreciate each other's outstanding literary talents.
Two
"Flowers on cow dung" is used by secular people to describe couples who are not well-matched. Modern people say: "Flowers are planted on cow dung because cow dung is nutritious" is the best annotation to the appearance of a talented woman. All along, the saying that Lang Cai matches female appearance and talent matching beauty has been widely accepted by people, whether it is an elderly man and woman who has been deeply involved in the world, or a young talent who has deviated from the past, when choosing a partner, he cannot bypass this concept inheritance that has been inherited for thousands of years. In fact, no matter the concept or human nature, from ancient times to the present, which man does not admire the beauty of sinking fish and falling geese and closing the moon and shy flowers, and which woman does not like to learn to be rich in five cars and learn the talents of the ancient and the modern? Women's beauty, first of all to men to bring visual pleasure, their skin is like gelatin, eyes like paint, mouth like cherries, they are like flowers, just like jade, their weakness, delicacy so that any man will produce compassion from the bottom of his heart, want to care, want to possess. Women's beauty can also give men a proud capital in their hearts, women are like a beautiful and luxurious dress for successful men, decorating their facades, highlighting their tastes, there is no doubt that no matter when and what generation, men are the most vanity animals, they hope to attract the attention of everyone, hope to win everyone's respect, at this moment, he is surrounded by brilliant, charming women, must be their proud work as a successful person icing on the cake. Women's beautiful genes, but also an important factor for men to consider passing on the generations, everyone hopes that their children are handsome, as parents, as "people who come over", of course, they know that a person's appearance is a natural condition, almost irreversible, unlike knowledge, ability, through the efforts of the day after tomorrow can be obtained, so excellent genetic genes are particularly important.
Men's talent, first of all, can bring women a sense of security, no matter how strong, how successful women, in front of stable and reliable men, always want to have a bird to rely on people, they want to snuggle in the man's solid arms, a show of women's femininity and affection, because such a self is the true embodiment of their hearts.
Second, talented men can bring glory to women. Although the society is developing rapidly, people's concepts are also changing, but this society is still a little higher in the composition of patriarchy, we usually listen to the people around us, who is this woman's wife, his husband is the boss of the enterprise, or his husband is the director, this woman has a good life, but married to the right person... To put it vulgarly, marrying the right person, you have gained identity and status, such a woman, wherever you go, will feel the envious eyes of others, will also be respected by others to varying degrees, their self-confidence and self-esteem will be greatly satisfied, and the sense of happiness will of course increase. Men's talents, of course, will also bring rich material conditions to women. People who have the ability and are willing to work hard, no matter in what era, can become superior people, and their efforts enable them to accumulate more material wealth than others, which is the inevitable law of social development and the gift of society to the hard-working people. The material condition is money, although money is not omnipotent, but no money can not be. Therefore, it is not so much that the husband and wife are not a good match, but rather that they are the result of the complementarity of each of the resources needed.
Three
The disparity in the economic conditions of the family often becomes a factor for people to evaluate the incompatibility between the poor parents and the party with superior material conditions in marriage. In fact, a truly successful marriage does not require the material conditions of both parties. Yanni was four years old and came from an aristocratic background. The two had a long-term relationship, and when Marx was 18 years old, he secretly made a marriage contract and entered the palace of marriage after 7 years of love. At that time, Marx and Yanni were not right, or long-distance love, sister and brother love, so their love suffered resistance from all sides. But afflictions see the truth. Marx did not abandon his revolutionary path, and Yanni did not leave Marx. She used her strength to love him and support him. No matter how bumpy and difficult life is, both of them suffer and share a lot of trouble, as usually said in marriage vows, "until death separates us". Marx's life is inseparable from Yanni's support and help. She was his faithful companion, his solid backing, a comrade-in-arms who fought side by side, and an extraordinary woman. A friend of mine grew up with his parents dying early, and his family was surrounded by walls, relying on odd jobs to survive. Later, he taught himself and embarked on the path of literary creation and arts and crafts processing. More than twenty years ago, his family was poor and destitute, and according to the world's eyes, my friend's marriage to his daughter-in-law was like a Shu Dao difficult to go to the qingtian. However, the reality of the sun is very kind to him, when one of his articles was published in a famous magazine in the north, a female fan fell in love with his talent, this girl is not only beautiful and generous, the family economic conditions are also very generous; this girl from adoration to admiration to love, not far away to his nest, with him to form a couple, husband and wife, hand in hand to create a better future. Now, more than twenty years later, he once had nothing, he has a house and a car with the help of his wife, and his children have been admitted to 985 University, becoming a happy family envied by many peers.
Four
Differences in age and cultural quality will also be considered as reasons for marriage mismatch. In fact, happy marriages with age gaps abound. Musician Li Shuangjiang is 27 years older than Mengge, in the entertainment industry also belongs to the age gap is relatively large, that year, Li Shuangjiang and Mengge's love, most friends are in favor, but there are also a few people who disagree with some gossip, and some even go to denigrate Li Shuangjiang. In this regard, Li Shuangjiang and Mengge are very calm. He firmly believes in his choice. For the attacks of others, they laughed and finally achieved a marriage of pearls. Couples with differences in cultural quality are also often considered to have no common language and are not easy to communicate, but the gap in cultural accomplishment still does not affect the perfect marriage of two people, and the marriage of Hu Shi, president of Peking University, and his wife Jiang Dongxiu is a classic case. In the history of the Republic of China with splendid culture, many literati and inkers, talents and talents appeared in turn, if the talented and beautiful people are compared to a gorgeous giant ship, then Hu Shi is one of the absolute navigators. He is one of the leaders of China who actively supported the overthrow of the vernacular and the propagation of the vernacular, and he is also a cultural all-rounder, involved in almost all fields, culture, history, art, music, all of which are familiar. Although he is not the top person in every field, he is erudite and knowledgeable. He is also a great scholar and the president of Peking University, cultivating many pillars. He was also nominated for the Nobel Prize in Literature.
As the saying goes: BMW gives heroes, and the country and mountains match beauty. Such a scholar, his wife, must be a big girl, and he must be proficient in piano, chess, calligraphy and painting, after all, so that he can match him Hu Shi. However, heaven seemed to have made a big joke with him, and his original match was neither a famous bridesmaid, who could play chess, calligraphy and painting, nor was he a famous lady, who could sing and dance. Rather, an illiterate littlefoot woman. That little-footed woman is called Jiang Dongxiu, a native of Anhui, and her ancestors were also officials, and she can also be regarded as a local famous family. Jiang Dongxiu's education level is not high, and she is short in stature, fat and round, not beautiful, and does not belong to the type that the more you look at it, the more you want to see. Their marriage is also a typical parental order, the word of the matchmaker. They have no love, and there is no so-called romance, because romance requires a certain amount of thought, knowledge, and obviously they are not romantic. Even if they are married, they will divorce now. But
Although the two have many differences and contradictions, but the companionship of a lifetime together is enough to make up for all dissatisfaction, Hu Shi's dedicated research and dedication to literary research have long been enough to make him live for hundreds of years, but Hu Shi's most admirable thing should be Hu Shi's tolerance and modesty, and the marriage that others seem to be unworthy has made him and Jiang Dongxiu live a sweet and happy life.
Five
A hundred years of repair to cross the same boat, a thousand years to repair a sleep together. Successful marriages, there is no reason not to be a good match. Recently, brushing a vibrato is very classic: marriage no one earns who loses, this is like three dollars a bag of salt, to fry dozens of tables and hundreds of dollars a table of dishes worth tens of thousands of yuan, but no salt bar is not OK, no dish is not OK. Successful marriage, although the outsider seems to have a thousand and ten thousand reasons for mismatch, but the couple is dependent on each other and sticking together sweet and happy days are enviable, they themselves think it is the standard match. As Hegel said in The Principles of the Philosophy of Law, "Existence is truth." The only criterion for evaluating whether marriage is a match is whether the feelings of both husband and wife are harmonious, and whether the man and woman in the marriage are happy with each other, not the superficial or even vulgar factors that are seen in the eyes of outsiders.