Wen Road Angel
The strange friend in this issue is a bipolar disorder patient. Bipolar disorder, also known as bipolar disorder. If depression is like a black dog, then in the life of a bipolar disorder patient, there are not only black dogs, but also violent dragons. In a short period of time, the patient's emotions will fall from the peak to the bottom, from one extreme to the other.
A few days before the marriage, the results of the hospital examination came out, and it was bipolar disorder.
I used to think that I had a strange temper, that I was irritable, and that I was prone to tears. When I collapsed, I felt that the negative energy was about to subvert the world in an instant, and my husband was helpless.
After checking it out, we were all relieved. It turned out that the reason I was so bad was because I was sick, not just a "personality" issue. Knowing why is a hope and a relief for us.
Bipolar disorder is a combination of two extreme emotions of mania and depression. /Unsplash
Since the condition was a bit serious, the doctor recommended that I be hospitalized for a month. The gentleman insisted on getting his license on time, I understood what he meant, and he wanted me to be relieved to receive treatment. On August 18, we did not consult with our parents, accompanied by several friends, went to the Civil Affairs Bureau to get a permit.
Next, the prepared wedding was cancelled, and the honeymoon went on, but the location was changed to one of the most famous psychiatric hospitals in Chongqing. Having made this decision, we all found it interesting.
I'm a tattoo artist, and in my spare time I used to post my work online, and my husband and I met that way. He felt that the world depicted in my work was very much like his childhood fantasies. From an early age, he had all kinds of strange ideas, and often in class, he began to fantasize that he had found a wormhole and traveled to outer space. After college, he became a securities broker, and in his spare time, he wrote science fiction novels online.
We were drawn to each other's whimsy.
The same weirdos, attracted to each other. /Bonnie and Joan
Probably since adolescence, I have felt something different about myself. Sometimes I often feel that emotions are high, and countless thoughts are gushing out of my head, and they gush out too fast for language expression to keep up. Sometimes with friends, I will become talkative, fast-talking, and often make friends laugh.
But in this case, I also became impulsive, once, in the middle school dormitory, I couldn't sleep in the middle of the night, I felt that there were countless ants crawling on my body, I wanted to go to the Internet café, so I climbed over the wall and broke my leg.
But when this state disappears, I will go to the other extreme and become very tired. Unprovoked frustration took control of me and kept me falling, like a never-ending abyss. Sometimes when I walk on the road, I fantasize that I will suddenly be hit and die by a falling object.
It is a luxury for people with bipolar disorder to encounter understanding. /American drama "Modern Love"
The most frightening thing is that these two extreme emotions may appear on the same day. When I am onset of mania, I feel that I will have all kinds of strange thoughts popping up in my head, and I often don't feel that I have any problems at this time; when depression comes, my mind is often very empty, I don't want to do anything, so I will always lose contact with my friends.
It seems that no matter how much language is used, it is impossible to fully express the state of "biphasic".
In fact, I have checked a lot of information before, vaguely aware of my own problems, but I know that treatment is very expensive, do not want to drag down my parents, so I graduated from high school and left home to live on my own. It wasn't until after being with my husband that he suggested I see a doctor that I confirmed, "Oh, I'm the legendary bipolar disorder."
On August 19, the day after we got our permits, we packed our bags and went to the hospital. All along, the "mental hospital" has been the occasion of suspense novels and horror novels, and before I went in, I was still a little nervous. After moving in, I found that it was more like a comfortable nursing home.
Mental hospitals are not as terrifying as the legend goes. /Pexels
All the doors and windows inside can't be opened, and those that can be opened have railings, which is a bit like in the TV. Other than that, everything was cosy, wooden floors, pink sheets, green hills and woods outside the window, and the sun was shining in from morning to night. There are also activity rooms and reading rooms for everyone to do.
The schedule here is very regular, and I feel like this derailed train is back on track. Eat breakfast at 7 o'clock every morning, then take medicine, do exercises, followed by various treatments in time, and do another exercise in the evening, and go to bed at 10 o'clock after doing it.
On the first day of taking medicine, I felt dizzy, like drinking white wine, and I was stumbling when I walked. Maybe it was the first time I took the relevant medicine, so the effect was particularly strong.
When I was a child, I didn't dare to drag down my family, so I had never received treatment before. /Unsplash
On day 5, I attended the hospital's group birthday party. The gentleman accompanied me in the back and told me before the opening, "If you feel uncomfortable, tell me right away, we will go back and not play", but I felt very good, everyone sang, ate cake, shared their feelings, and that moment felt like going back to kindergarten.
On day 10, I felt my "emotions" come back a bit, and I used to be easy to empathize with things in the distance, but I was very indifferent to the people and things around me. Now, I often feel a feeling of love in my heart. Before going to bed that night, I felt that I was a little irritable again, but the gentleman held me and gently patted my head, and then I lost consciousness and fell asleep.
Except for fixed matters, I could arrange the rest of the time myself, so I walked around and recorded everything I saw. There are mothers accompanying their children in the ward, there are elderly people who accompany their wives, and there are also those who are alone. Here, tears, laughter, and pain coexist, some of which are alleviated by symptoms and when they are readmitted.
Occasionally, my husband pulled me to chat with them, and I realized that I was not the only one who had such pain.
The singer I like, Lu Kaitong, left because of "biphasic".
Now, we have spent more than ten days in the hospital "honeymoon", I suddenly feel that this is really a "honeymoon", receiving treatment in the hospital, and with the company and support of Mr. Wang, I feel that it is getting better a little bit.
It's just that sir and I are mentally prepared, bipolar disorder is not so easy to deal with, it may torture us over and over again, only if we are stuck like a tight gear, we can move forward step by step.
Love is always the way out for humanity. / Norwegian TV series Shame