Dark moments in my life

In the winter of 2003, I left home for a full year, after the SARS period. Because of his young age, he did not have a deep understanding of SARS, but he had one more pass in and out of the rental house.

I bought a pager in Chinese for only 100 yuan, and now I can't remember the switchboard number of the pager at that time, because there were a lot of radio stations at that time. The paging number was compiled by itself, five digits, and finally used for its own birthday, 19871. It took less than a year, the pager broke, and the radio slowly went out of business. That was the winter of that year, I rented a house outside and lived alone. Dongguan Hutun on Garden Road, a particularly clean rental house, the rent is 180 a month, other places are 120--150 a standard room, 180 is expensive, there is a kitchen, there is a bathroom. I was satisfied, but the cost of living was less than 500 at the time. So it's also a relatively large expense.

I was 16 years old, rebellious, unspeakable rebellious! The only friend is the old watch, who lives in a village, but is far away, the only communication is that he will send me a page every time he leaves work, and when I get home, I will use the extension in the house to call him back, and before he can connect me, he will hang up, and he will understand. There are two reasons, one is that the telephone bill is very expensive, one minute is more than 3 cents, you need to use 201 or 301 cards to dial out, and the residents have more extensions. A lot of times it's busy. Second, the extension will cross the tone, that is, when the phone is on the phone, other phones can hear the conversation. PHS and mobile phones are expensive, so you can only communicate like this.

Because of rebellion, he began to hate everyone and avoid everything, like a neurosis. For 2 or 3 months without saying a word, going to restaurants to eat with their fingers, answering always, um, um. Later, because I needed to work and live, I had to go to work in a shop on Traffic Road and Rehabilitation Front Street, because I didn't want to communicate with people, so I never did a bus, and there were too many people on the bus. 100 yuan to buy a second-hand and assembled bicycle at the place where the bicycle was repaired. The wind and rain never stop, and I fight with myself. Silly as well. I get up at 6 o'clock every day, because I go to work at 8 o'clock, and I need to leave early, at least 50 minutes on the road, or in the case of running a red light. Every day after work at 9 o'clock, when there are people, there is no point, and most of them come home at 10 o'clock and 11 o'clock.

I remember one day it was snowing heavily and I came home wet. Still not addictive, not exciting enough, really dead, I took a cold shower in the winter for the first time. No air conditioning, no electric heating, no electric blanket, just like this ice water poured through, at that time I felt very grandfatherly, but I did not know that later there was irritating stomach cramps, until now the stomach can not be cold, because it will hurt the stomach. It's exciting enough.

At that time, I was not accustomed to seeing all people doing things, and I felt that they were not real enough, and they were all hypocritical, as if they were only a saint. I didn't call my parents once in half a year, and as for my family looking for me later, I didn't answer the phone on the pretext of being busy. Think about how stupid it is. I can't feel my parents' feelings at all, and I don't care how worried my parents are and how irresponsible they are.

The rebellious period of adolescence is very special for people's lives, and the originally extreme character becomes more incomprehensible because they close themselves off. How many years later I learned that I was an Aquarius, extremely stubborn, self-righteous. Once the bicycle tire was punctured, because the repair master felt that there was no need to repair it, and it was necessary to replace a new tire, and I ghostly forced the master to remove and replace the other tire. Because I think the two are not the same. It can't be different! I still remember the look in my eyes when the master looked at me! Puzzled? Still confused? After I left, I guess I only laughed, huh!

Those days refused to communicate with everyone, everyone to communicate, so that everything that happened was done by themselves, and they could resist death, and they couldn't resist love. Slowly life is becoming more and more difficult, even eating is a problem, and smoking and drinking, the body is getting worse and worse every day. Weighing less than 100 pounds, skinny and skinny. That is, at that time, it affects the development of the body, and nutrition cannot keep up when the body is long. Later, the old watch really couldn't see it, so he often brought his girlfriend to come to me for dinner, slowly opened his heart, and slowly accepted the outside world. It's ridiculous to think about. It took half a year to get out of the world only for myself. Sometimes in retrospect, that's when I learned true independence. Mutation of independence!

Now as parents, they also understand the importance of parental companionship. How important it is to have family or friends guide you to solve things. This really affects the direction of a person's life. Choosing the darkness of my heart on the sunniest days is also a kind of wealth for me personally.

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Those years are still unforgettable, often remembered, often sighed! Please cherish time, cherish feelings, cherish everything that can be cherished, because there is no future life in the past!